help!!! i am losing my mind.... PLEASE BE NICE!!!
So i have 3 boys.. ages are 11,9,7.. well they dont listen much... but my 7 yr old is driving me crazy... He has ADHD... but he dont listen to me at all.. if i get on to him he just laughs in my face.... i have to tell him 100 times to do something... and then it still dont get done right...
this morning i got all 3 of them up at 6:05 the bus runs at 6:45.. well my other 2 was ready by 6:15 and eat b-fast.. but my 7 yr old was slow about getting ready.. if i dont stand over him he wont get ready.... well this morning he didnt want to put his shoes on.. he almost missed the bus.. then he didnt want to get on the bus when it stopped.. he didnt get to eat b-fast before he left...
I DONT WHIP ANY OF MY KIDS.. I FEEL LIKE A BAD MOTHER IF I DO...
MY HUBBY (THEIR STEP-DAD) TELLS ME ALL THE TIME TO WHIP THEM.. BUT I CANT....
they get what they want.. i let them do whatever they want to as for as playing outside and stuff like that...
I JUST DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE... HELP PLEASE!!!
Some of it is the age- Ds2 (8) hasn't been too bad, but ds1 at that age. . . yeah, not fun.
What sort of punishment/discipline does he get when he misbehaves? Find his "currency"- what will make the biggest impression on him, and be consistant w/ it. It will take a while, but it will eventually sink in that you mean business and he can't get away w/ his behavior.
I GUESS YOU CAN SAY THEY DONT... I DO TAKE THE TV AWAY AT TIMES OR NOT LET THEM PLAY OUTSIDE BUT OTHER THAN THAT THEY DONT...
THIS MIGHT BE MAKING ME A BAD MOTHER LOL...
Quoting ShesALady:
Well you said they get what they want, but what are their consequences? How are they disciplined?
I DONT GET WHAT UR SAYING??
Quoting JoyfulMommy1221:
Look up love and logic. Seems like that would fit your parenting style better!
This is your biggest problem: "they get what they want.. i let them do whatever they want to as for as playing outside and stuff like that... "
they need to have consequences for bad behavior. You can discipline your children without whipping them. If you tell him to do something and he doesn't do it, he doesn't play outside (if that is what he wants to do) or he doesn't play with that video game. Whatever it is that he likes to do.
It doesn't make you a "BAD" mother but it makes you ineffective.
Think about it - if there were no consequences to YOU just sitting around doing whatever you wanted to do - - wouldn't YOU do it?
You don't because you know what happens - that there are consequences to pay.
So if YOU know - - why aren't you teaching your children the same?
Don't be their buddy - be their mom. Whipping does not need to be involved IMHO.
a google search is what she means. Here, I've done it FOR you
Quoting krisgarcia:I DONT GET WHAT UR SAYING??
Quoting JoyfulMommy1221:
Look up love and logic. Seems like that would fit your parenting style better!
WELL THE THING IS THEY DONT HAVE A TV IN THEIR ROOM ( THEY SHARE ONE ROOM).. BECAUSE THEY HAVE TORE ALL THEM UP ( THEY WENT TOUGH 4 TV'S IN 5 MTHS) SO I PUT ANOTHER ONE IN THERE... ALL THEIR TOYS ARE BROKE ( BECAUSE THEY BREAK THEM).. I DO GROUND THEM FROM OUTSIDE BUT THATS ALL I GOT TO TAKE AWAY FROM THEM...
Quoting wakymom:
Some of it is the age- Ds2 (8) hasn't been too bad, but ds1 at that age. . . yeah, not fun.
What sort of punishment/discipline does he get when he misbehaves? Find his "currency"- what will make the biggest impression on him, and be consistant w/ it. It will take a while, but it will eventually sink in that you mean business and he can't get away w/ his behavior.
What time does the 7 yr old go to bed? My 8 yr old goes to bed at 8 pm and is up at 5:00 am
He gets up a 6:05 and leaves for the bus at 6:45? That only gives him 40 minutes to wake up and then get ready for school. I couldn't do that. Wake him up at 5:30 am, give him 30 minutes to wake up and drink some oj. Give him a chance to kinda wake up a bit and start his day on a nicer note. Then have him get ready for school and leave.
Make him a sticker chart. If he can get ready on time on his own without problems he gets a sticker. ( or if you can't do stickers draw a happy face on a homemade chart) 5 stickers in a row he gets a small reward, maybe a candy treat or some time with mom.
If he gives you problems he doesn't get his sticker that day and he has to go to bed 30 minutes earlier.
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Sister's kids' parties and events....too much...need advice
- krisgarcia
on Feb. 17, 2012 at 8:32 AM