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8 yr old with severe fits

Posted by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 1:57 AM
  • 9 Replies

This is an ongoing problem that has progressed going on 3 years now. Yes, I know that kids have fits. But I have never seen or heard of fits these bad. She will be have one over the smallest of things, being told to do a chore over playing or in general being told anything she doesnt like or want to do. She doesnt do this on a daily basis, rather she is very good most of the time, so I never know when its coming.  So hear are the " symptoms"  Saying no or pouting then after being told to do something repeatedly she ignores me n bows her head. When I carry her to her room (when she refuses to do so herself) she then starts screaming at the top of her lungs and will trash her rooms bang on walls and even repeat what i told her she has to do over and over (no I dont wanna go to my room! even when shes sitting in her room) ,( this will continue for hours and hours) sometimes she will even wet herself and sit in it until i check on her. I am sooooo exhasted of hearing the blood curling screaming, (as well as my neighbors must think I'm beating my child when I'm not ) What do I do??? I have already started to enroll her in councelling, but is that enough? I have done the taking away her things, and it doesnt seem to affect her, Im so lost....

by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 1:57 AM
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by Ruby Member on Apr. 11, 2012 at 8:54 AM

 Remove everything from her rm except her mattress so she can't trash it. If she wets herself, she has to do the laundry and clean up any other mess from it. Stay consistant. Remember it will take time for the counseling to help (good for you for getting her help, btw).







by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 8:54 AM
Go to the counseling. She is experiencing something if its uncommon but becoming more frequent. Hugs to you. I go through this with my adhd daughter and it is a test of patience.
by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 9:29 AM
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My youngest daughter did the very same thing, I can totally relate, they started when she was 3 and she is slowly starting to come out of them now, at almost 7.   I tried taking things away, yelling back at her, ignoring it, all the stuff those know-it-all magazine articles tell you to do. Nothing worked. Till finally I had enough.  During one of her fits, I went to her door, stood there calmly, and asked her, without raising my voice so she had to quiet down to hear me,  "Do you see how you are acting right now? Is this how Big girls act? Do you ever see me act like this?"  She stopped and thought about it, then put here head down and said, "no"  Sometimes we just need to talk to our kids, they are people too and don't understand how to handle their feelings all the time.  Try explaining to her how you feel, and that it's not appropriate to act that way. See if that helps. :) making my kids stop and reflect on their behavior really goes a long way.

by Barbara on Apr. 11, 2012 at 1:42 PM

I have no advice, sorry, besides counseling--which you're trying--and maybe looking at books written on the subject.

You can always come here for some support at least. Hugs.

by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 2:31 PM
Does she have any other symptoms (OCD behaviors, blinking or odd facial movements, or any sensory (socks feel weird, tags, loud noises, light, etc). Has she had several strep infections? Does she have allergies?

Cognitive Behavior therapy is get for someone like her. Someone that can get her to get past the issue.

I would get her to an immunologist to see if there is something causing these rage issues.

She sounds exactly like my son. He has PANDAS, tourette's, severe allergies & an autoimmune disorder.

Hand in Hand parenting has great articles for parenting through major meltdowns.

Hope this helps!
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by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 6:57 PM

Talk to her doctor.  There are a lot of childhood problems that can play out as behavior issues.  Something as simple as a vitamin deficiency or something as complex as Autism. 

My oldest has Autism and had behavior problems until we found better was of expressing himself. Behavior therapy has worked wonders for him, but it takes time. We have been going for 5 years now.

by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 10:22 PM

You are receiving great advice and I agreed with the comments made in the post. Good luck with your counseling. Whatever you decide to do always be constant with her.

by on Apr. 11, 2012 at 10:34 PM

my daughter will do the same thing and shes 7 and in counceling she even had her brothers doing it for a time and they are on counciling too with her its takeing longer but its worth it. i agree with the pp that said take all but what she needs and make her clean up the pee. my daughter will scream and force herself to vomit and i make her clean it up. AND if she refuses to clean her room she cna stay in there till its clean and IF she chooses to come out she gets in trouble. i will give her a choice and she hates the choice cause with any one of them she has to clean a room an ddo it NOW not latter. and if she refuses and it comes time to go to visit her great grandparents or go off with daddy she cant go anywhere. good luck with this one mine screams so loud you can hear her across the yard from inside her room... AND WE LIVE IN A BRICK HOUSE!!

by on Apr. 12, 2012 at 12:47 PM

My daughter used to have out of control temper tantrums like you describe.  Hers turned out to be in reaction to allergy medication.  The Doctor had us give her claritin, then zyrtec to control seasonal allergies(not at the same time).   It wasn't until she experienced hallucinations while on a trial of Allegra that we realized it was the medicine causing the issues.  Is your daughter on any medications?  Once we took her off the medication her tantrums decreased both in severity and frequency.  The few tantrums she had after that were "normal"...I was so relieved.

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