Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

Question to moms who have kids in daycare

Posted by   + Show Post

I work monday-wednesday, so my daughters are in preschool during those times. I love the daycare, its very convienant because it is 3 blocks from my house. I like almost everyone that works there, and interacts with my kids. My youngest daughter is also in their daycare program. My only "problem" with the daycare isn't so much as a problem, just an aggrevation, and I would like some others thoughts on the matter.

My girls just started daycare about a year ago. Before that, my sister watched them when I had to go to work. I did alot of research on the different daycares//preschools in the area to pick the one that I thought best. One, my sister used to work at, and it was nice but a little out of the way from the way both I and my ex travel for work. The other my exes sister and mother both used to work at and was only a block away from the one my sister used to work at. And the one that they go to, which is where my exes girlfriend works at, and is 3 blocks from my house. 

We ultimately decided to send he girls to this daycare because its so close to where I live, and I am the main caregiver. My exes gf and I do not like each other, and really dont get along, but we always put on a nice face for the kids. Another deciding factor for them going there was because she worked there. Yes, I don't like her, but my kids were familiar with her, and my ex and I both thought that a familiar face might make the transistion easier for them.

When they started going there she was not on the approved list for pick up. She was aware of this, and was ok with the decision because she had just started dating him a few months earlier. Well a few times she did take the girls home on their dads weekend, and no one told me about it. I only found about it because my daughters slipped and told me. I was FURIOUS! They didnt call to ask me, they didn't call and ask my ex, they just let her take them beacuse they knew she was dating their dad. I don't feel that this was right. I called and complained to the owner and she said it wouldn't happen again.

Fast-forward to this year. She was put on the list for pick up in case of emergency, It has been almost 2 years and apparently they are getting married next month. My daughter let slip again that the gf MOTHER came to pick her up one day because it was her dads weekend and he was at work, and the gf was off that day. The mother was not on the list, but because she was the gfs mom, she was allowed to pick my daughters up. And more recently, last week, my daughter got sick and started puking in daycare on Friday. It was her dads weekend, but I was off work. NO ONE from the daycare called to let me know she was sick. Instead they made her go down and sit with my exes gf until my other daughter got off the bus. Even if I was at work that day, if my daughter was sick I would have gone home and picked her up instead of making her sit for 4 hours in the daycare still. And again, I only found out because my daughter slipped and told me.

My question is: Am I over-reacting here or am I justified in being upset? What would you do if you were in this situation?

by on Apr. 28, 2012 at 8:33 PM
Replies (41-46):
JadensMom1116
by on May. 10, 2012 at 6:20 PM
1 mom liked this

I'd sit down with your ex & the GF and lay it all out. Say "This stops now, or I will file a formal complaint. Further, I will go back to court and present this evidence that you are willfully endangering our children & breaking the law, and ask for supervised visitations only. This is the last warning." Be sure the GF is there - she seems to be the root of this problem. If you don't stand up and make sure your kids are safe, they will keep walking all over you. What happens if your ex & this GF breakup? These are YOUR kids, not hers, and she has NO right. She is an employee, not a family member.

AlliBeeC
by Member on May. 10, 2012 at 9:41 PM

When I picked my youngest up from daycare today I arranged a meeting between the director, their dad, the gf and her cousin for next week. I have copies of the signed "approved pick up lists" from when they were turned in, and everytime my kids told me about her picking them up before she was on it, her mom picking them up, the flu incident I wrote down. So we will see what happens.

Quoting JadensMom1116:

I'd sit down with your ex & the GF and lay it all out. Say "This stops now, or I will file a formal complaint. Further, I will go back to court and present this evidence that you are willfully endangering our children & breaking the law, and ask for supervised visitations only. This is the last warning." Be sure the GF is there - she seems to be the root of this problem. If you don't stand up and make sure your kids are safe, they will keep walking all over you. What happens if your ex & this GF breakup? These are YOUR kids, not hers, and she has NO right. She is an employee, not a family member.


pinkcsmtlgy
by Bronze Member on May. 11, 2012 at 8:54 AM

I would seriously consider switching daycares.

nonnahsregah40
by on May. 11, 2012 at 9:16 AM

I don't think you are over reacting- I would sit my ex- the soon to be ex'swife and the owner of the day care down and talk about the issues at hand and explain to them exactly- that in cases of sickness you want to be notified no matter what and explain to all that unless the person is on the pickup list- your children are not to be aloud to go anywhere without your permission. You do know you will step on his toes! Good luck! that pickup list is a legal document and if anything happens to your children in someone else's care that isn't on the list the school will be held liable.

cherokeegoddess
by on May. 13, 2012 at 1:35 PM

you have every right to be upset.. I work in a childcare center myself. our policy is that if we cannot get ahold of the parents then we go to the emergency contacts. but that is very rarely that we ever do the emergency contacts unless the parent says so after we contact them.. and they have to show ID but what that daycare is doing is illegal they can be shut down. i would find alternative care. the daycare is supposed to be looking after the well being and safety of the child.

andreahm
by on May. 13, 2012 at 3:18 PM

 I would be upset also.  I would call and let them know that if this sort of thing continues, that youll be pulling your children out of there.

CafeMom Tickers
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN