Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

when did u......

Posted by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:00 AM
  • 20 Replies

talk to your kids about sex? ive been telling my husband for several months now that i think we need to talk to our 9 year old (almost 10) about sex but he says its way to early! i think we really need to talk to him before he learns about it from someelse and maybe even gets incorrect information. weve talked with him about drugs and addiction and things like that but when it comes to sex my husband like freaks about talking to the kids. i told him i would do it but hes like adamant that he thinks its too early and im gonna screw up his head or something. what age did u talk to your kids about it? and how did u initiate the conversation???

by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:00 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
steelcrazy
by Emerald Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:04 AM
1 mom liked this

I am one of those strange people who doesn't believe in having "the talk".  We've had many talks over the years and it began with teaching the proper names for body parts when they were toddlers and has gone on from there.  Every time that they have a question, I answer it honestly and age appropriately.

Does your dd know about periods and her changing body?  If not, I would begin to discuss that ASAP.  I have boys, but several of the ladies have mentioned a good book by the American Girl people, you may want to check that out for some help on this exciting topic.

ProudMommy51006
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:05 AM
Follow your husband. He was a little boy once, he knows how little boys are and how other little boys are. My dh is guiding me with our son because I am terrified to introduce sex to early to him. I was a little girl once so I can relate better to our daughter, I will guide us with her.

*edit, oh and dh said he thinks middle school is an appropriate time with our son.
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
auroragold
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:06 AM

way before age 9 for sure.

I see it as a series of ongoing conversations that are applicable to his/her age. Not everything needs to be said in one sitting

auroragold
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:07 AM


Quoting ProudMommy51006:

Follow your husband. He was a little boy once, he knows how little boys are and how other little boys are. My dh is guiding me with our son because I am terrified to introduce sex to early to him. I was a little girl once so I can relate better to our daughter, I will guide us with her.

Yet times have changed so much since "we" were little. The things our children are exposed to in elementary school I learned about in College!

endurablemist
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:09 AM

I have always answered any questions she had honestly. I think the first "talk" we had she was 5, and I heard her playing with barbies and had one of the barbies ask the other if they wanted to have sex. DD is 9 now, and knows all about sex, and puberty, or at least the basics. She also still asks questions, but doesn't like to talk about it in front of her dad.

Javamama619
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:12 AM

I do a little at a time like when they pick something up from school or have questions its all age appropriate things, and really I never over did it or made it like an uncomfortable thing, my son is 8 and knows all propper terms, that bath time is alone time, I BF my babies and he sees that breasts are functional not just sexual (unlike my younger brother who is 9) but really thats how I do its just mini convo's that play into aily life about basic things after all it is a normal part of human nature an nothing to be uncomfortable about

ProudMommy51006
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:13 AM
I do agree with this to an extent, we are young parents though, so it wasn't all that long ago that we were in middle school.

Times are so different, especially with all the technology. I think it is still dh's job to guide the discussion... I have never been a little boy, boys are made up different than girls. So, in my opinion dh is more qualified to determine this. Lol at least in our home. We both are very open, but cautious parents.


Quoting auroragold:


Quoting ProudMommy51006:

Follow your husband. He was a little boy once, he knows how little boys are and how other little boys are. My dh is guiding me with our son because I am terrified to introduce sex to early to him. I was a little girl once so I can relate better to our daughter, I will guide us with her.

Yet times have changed so much since "we" were little. The things our children are exposed to in elementary school I learned about in College!

Posted on CafeMom Mobile
Traci_Momof2
by Silver Member on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:21 AM

Well, I think I was about 10 or 11 years old when I learned the mechanics of sex - and I learned it from a friend.  That was back in the mid '80's.  So I would say that if you don't want him learning from a friend first, you probably shouldn't wait too much longer.

Has he already learned all about puberty and what is going to happen to his body?  IMO, that should come before talking about sexual intercourse.  And you really don't want to hit him with everything all at once.  Has he come to either of you with questions?  That would be a good place to start - answer the questions that he has and then see if it generates more for him or not.  Sort of let him lead the conversation , letting him decide how much is too little or too much information.

rnmom4lif
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:27 AM

yes agree not only have things changed  a whole hell of alot since we were kids but even if i did say ok compare to my dh- well the first time my DH had oral was at 9 year old so HELLO- dont u think maybe we should talk to our son about it???? 

Quoting auroragold:


Quoting ProudMommy51006:

Follow your husband. He was a little boy once, he knows how little boys are and how other little boys are. My dh is guiding me with our son because I am terrified to introduce sex to early to him. I was a little girl once so I can relate better to our daughter, I will guide us with her.

Yet times have changed so much since "we" were little. The things our children are exposed to in elementary school I learned about in College!


rnmom4lif
by on Apr. 30, 2012 at 9:28 AM

i dont have any girls- only boys so i dont have to have the period talk thank goodness but i do think he needs to be aware of erections, wet dreams, changing body and what have u and my husband thinks its too early even to talk to him about thoose things.- i strongly disagree. 

Quoting steelcrazy:

I am one of those strange people who doesn't believe in having "the talk".  We've had many talks over the years and it began with teaching the proper names for body parts when they were toddlers and has gone on from there.  Every time that they have a question, I answer it honestly and age appropriately.

Does your dd know about periods and her changing body?  If not, I would begin to discuss that ASAP.  I have boys, but several of the ladies have mentioned a good book by the American Girl people, you may want to check that out for some help on this exciting topic.


Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

close Join now to connect to
other members!
Connect with Facebook or Sign Up Using Email

Already Joined? LOG IN