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Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

How do you deal with friend issues?

Posted by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 5:34 PM
  • 5 Replies

The group of boys my son hangs out with at recess were being mean to another boy in the group.  My son stuck up for this kid and then the other boys told my son he's a traitor and they were friends with him anymore (I swear I thought girls were catty but boys are horrible!)  I told DS I was proud of him for sticking up for his friend and it would blow over but he said,"Mom, these kids are not very forgiving.  Once you're out, you're out."  He is pretty bummed, I tried telling him that this is part of life and to find nicer kids to hang out with.  How would you handle it?  I want my child to be confident and not a follower but I also need to be sensitive to his feelings.  It's also hard because he is new to the school this year and most of the other kids have been together since Kindergarten.  It's a smaller school.

by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 5:34 PM
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shamroc374
by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 5:36 PM
1 mom liked this
I went through this with my son. He made new friends, and then after a little time he became friends with the old group again too. It just had to run the course and now he has a larger group of friends that understand that he is not a follower and he respects everyone.
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steelcrazy
by Emerald Member on Jan. 10, 2013 at 5:38 PM
1 mom liked this

I would let my child handle it.  I'm not exactly sure which grade your child is in, but if you've talked to him about what you expect from him and what makes a good friend, he most likely is more than able to handle it in his own way.  Even if his way isn't how you would have handled it, let him learn from his own decisions.

Mama2ETA
by Bronze Member on Jan. 10, 2013 at 5:38 PM
1 mom liked this

 this exactly. Just keep building his confidense and telling him how proud you are that he stuck up for the other boy, and is nice to everyone.

Quoting shamroc374:

I went through this with my son. He made new friends, and then after a little time he became friends with the old group again too. It just had to run the course and now he has a larger group of friends that understand that he is not a follower and he respects everyone.

 

marysmithy
by on Jan. 10, 2013 at 5:42 PM
1 mom liked this

4th grade.  I like the way he handled it and it's not something I would call the school about.  I just want to make sure I am telling him the right things because I made it out not to be a big deal, that it would work out.  BUt it's hard to see your kid upset.

Quoting steelcrazy:

I would let my child handle it.  I'm not exactly sure which grade your child is in, but if you've talked to him about what you expect from him and what makes a good friend, he most likely is more than able to handle it in his own way.  Even if his way isn't how you would have handled it, let him learn from his own decisions.


frndlyfn
by Gold Member on Jan. 10, 2013 at 5:43 PM

I would do as the others have said, remind him that he can always find friends who will respect him for standing up for someone who is being targeted with meanness.

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