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Bullying and grade decline

Posted by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 9:50 PM
  • 7 Replies

My daughter is 12 and in 6th grade. She has ALWAYS been a straight A student..and very hard on herself. Her dad and I have NEVER said you have to make straight A's but we have always told her we do expect her to do her best.  About 4 weeks ago her teacher called me to notify me that her grade in one of her classes was no where near where it has ever been and definitely not where it should be...she told me that my daughter had a zero for not completing and turning in homework that she was given a 2nd chance to do so. We talked about "outside influences", possible problems at home or in the neighborhood etc. I told her I would talk to my daughter, but I also did some investigating of my own..3 girls at school were "Bullies"- and not just to my daughter, but to other girls in the school. I found out that during PE fights would go on, but the PE coach never caught-on. I made copies of horrible messages sent to my daughter and talked to her when she got home. She told me that she tried to just stay away from the girls, but there is only so much she could do herself. I called the school and was told they took care of it- they transfered my daughter to another class and the teacher walked my daughter to and from the bus..this happened for 1 day and actually only made it worse b/c the next day she had to go back to the same class with the same girls. The messages and threats continued so I went to the school and talked to the principal, I showed her all of the messages, thereats etc. They switched my daughter that day to another classs, made sure her schedule didn't coincide with theirs at all and my daughter was "safe" Since they (the middle of December) there have been no problems and the girls actaully apologized to my daughter. 
 Today my daughter brings home her report card and she is failing a class...I don't know what think...is it still backlast from the incident (the semester ended right before Christmas break and report cards just went home today) or do I think that she is just not trying her hardest anymore because she has always done so well? I requested a conference with her teachers and I have also deactived her facebook until progress reports in 3 weeks..  

It's not goodbye, it's see you soon. girl on a swing

by on Jan. 15, 2013 at 9:50 PM
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Replies (1-7):
coolmommy2x
by Gold Member on Jan. 15, 2013 at 10:41 PM
I would wait for the conference. If the actual marking period ended at the time this was being fixed, it sounds to me like it's residual. What did DD say about it?
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steelcrazy
by Emerald Member on Jan. 15, 2013 at 11:29 PM

Have you talked to your dd about it?  I'm also thinking that it is just residual and nothing to get too worried about just yet.  You need to give it time to see if her grades improve now that the changes have been implemented.

If your school has a way to check grades online, do that weekly to keep up with how things are doing.

Barabell
by Barbara on Jan. 16, 2013 at 11:03 AM

Of course the emotional distress she's been through this year is going to affect her grades.

I suggest talking to your daughter about this, and I would also talk to the teach to see what caused the failure and how your daughter can improve in that class.


Pukalani79
by Silver Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 12:26 PM

 I think the first thing you need to do is to talk to your daughter and find out from her.

corrinacs
by Silver Member on Jan. 16, 2013 at 12:35 PM

Good call on deactivating her facebook.  A child that age shoudn't have an account anyway.......and unfortunately, at this age they aren't responsible (not her perse, but bullies) . There's lots of talk in the news about online shaming, and facebook is one of hte major ways its taking place.

I would talk to your daughter about what's going on.  It could be related to the bullying.  Is this class right after PE or right before PE where she came in contact with these girls?  If so, it could be that she's unable to pay attention as she's thinking about "waht she's going to do" to avoid the conflict.  It could be simply that she's not understanding some key part to the class she's failing.  It happens from tiem to time, but as long as you all get to the bottom of it, she can catch up :)

Talk to the teacher, principal, etc some more.  Make sure they tell you that they are making the bullies' parents involved and that there are repercussions for them.  Don't let them get away with just "we are putting her elsewhere for today".  That dosen't solve the problem, that just puts a bandaid on it for a day.

Good luck!


CEMomma1979
by on Jan. 20, 2013 at 9:57 AM

I talked to my dd teacher. She said that the grades on her report card do not reflect how she is doing now, and actaually right now she's back to her straight A's. The report cards were from the "bullying" time frame. The girls were in the class that she failed and she thinks that my dd was distracted/worried/scared and therefore didn't do her best. We are going to email weekly- grades, conduct etc and if any issues come up handle them asap. 

It's not goodbye, it's see you soon. girl on a swing

janitablue
by Janita on Jan. 20, 2013 at 1:48 PM


I am glad everything work out. Kudos to you for taking the steps that was needed to help your daughter. 

Quoting CEMomma1979:

I talked to my dd teacher. She said that the grades on her report card do not reflect how she is doing now, and actaually right now she's back to her straight A's. The report cards were from the "bullying" time frame. The girls were in the class that she failed and she thinks that my dd was distracted/worried/scared and therefore didn't do her best. We are going to email weekly- grades, conduct etc and if any issues come up handle them asap. 




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