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Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

Attendance awards are cruel?

Posted by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:12 AM
Max
  • 90 Replies
14 moms liked this

This is an obvious spin off from the post about attendance awards. 

I already said in that post I don't think they really encourage the kids with poor attendance to come to school more so they don't really help attendance problems. 

But as I read through the thread I was struck by how many moms thought it was unfair or even cruel for some kids to be given this award since their own child wouldn't be getting it. 

But isn't that true for any award? What would the point be of award if everyone got it?

Should we stop giving sports awards because the less coordinated kids will be sad they didn't get it? Is an art award unfair to the students who don't draw well?

The bigger question is really why are kids upset if their classmates get something they don't? Not receiving an award isn't a punishment. But somehow it seems to be interpreted that way but students and parents. Of course a young child may feel a little disappointment when he or she sees a classmate get to take home a certificate or trophy. But as parents isn't it our job to teach them they should be happy for the other child and help them realize that everyone has different strengths?

One my struggling students is working to earn perfect attendance this year. He has his own alarm clock in his room and gets up and out to the bus 10 minutes early every day because he knows if he misses the bus he can't get to school. He earned perfect attendance last year and the trophy sits on a shelf in the middle of the living room. Anyone who comes over is shown the trophy the second they walk through the door. This award gave him something to be proud of.  He comes to school every day and watches his classmates out score him on every test and assignments. So when he got to walk up on that stage to get his trophy it was a huge accomplishment to him. 

So if you think it's so cruel your kid didn't get an award because they got sick a few times maybe you should consider just being happy for the kids that did get it. 

by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:12 AM
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Replies (1-10):
jen113000
by Jenna on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:19 AM
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I definitely agree with you. Kids need to learn that not everyone gets an award for everything. My sons school doesn't have awards for attendance because parents were sending in sick kids so they did away with it. I'm glad only because now hopefully parents will keep their kids home when they are sick.
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maxswolfsuit
by Max on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:21 AM


Quoting jen113000:

I definitely agree with you. Kids need to learn that not everyone gets an award for everything. My sons school doesn't have awards for attendance because parents were sending in sick kids so they did away with it. I'm glad only because now hopefully parents will keep their kids home when they are sick.

I agree. 

I'm not saying I think attendance awards are awesome. I just think getting rid of them because they are "unfair" is BS.

momma1708
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:32 AM
3 moms liked this

some parents just can't stand to lose. Jeeze. I'd like to know if the kids are really the sore losers or if the parents are. 


Quoting jen113000:

I definitely agree with you. Kids need to learn that not everyone gets an award for everything. My sons school doesn't have awards for attendance because parents were sending in sick kids so they did away with it. I'm glad only because now hopefully parents will keep their kids home when they are sick.



Starshine-bela
by on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:37 AM
3 moms liked this
It seems to be a mindset with parents these days. No such thing as winning or losing so no real chance to fail and thus no real chance to improve. It's unfair if one's child doesn't get a trophy or medal just because another child did. I don't agree with this mind set. I believe in teaching my child to work hard and failing if necessary just so he can learn to improve. His karate teacher teaches black belt ethics. For the one titled effort, he teaches the kids, "winners never quit and quitters never win. Always work hard and try your best." We practice this at home too.
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maxswolfsuit
by Max on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:41 AM

clapping

Failing is the only way to really accomplish anything great.

Quoting Starshine-bela:

It seems to be a mindset with parents these days. No such thing as winning or losing so no real chance to fail and thus no real chance to improve. It's unfair if one's child doesn't get a trophy or medal just because another child did. I don't agree with this mind set. I believe in teaching my child to work hard and failing if necessary just so he can learn to improve. His karate teacher teaches black belt ethics. For the one titled effort, he teaches the kids, "winners never quit and quitters never win. Always work hard and try your best." We practice this at home too.


huskermom98
by Silver Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:49 AM
2 moms liked this

I think if a kid just happens to have perfect attendance, then that should be rewarded---but I didn't think the situation in the other post (pizza party for the class with the best attendance for the next two weeks, or something like that) is a good idea because it may cause sick kids to attend when they shouldn't which leads to more sick kids.

My oldest had perfect attendance in kindergarten, but it didn't get recognized (I'm guessing the school doesn't do that...?)  But it would have been nice because it was quite an achievement in my mind because at one point half of his class was sick for nearly a week!  He missed two days in 1st grade (sent home sick because he threw up halfway through the day, and then we kept him home one extra day over Cmas break to watch a Nebraska football Bowl game).  So far, so good this year in 2nd grade...

teri4lance
by Bronze Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:49 AM
1 mom liked this

I don't think it's cruel. That said, what I personally had an issue with was the teachers telling the kids if they tried harder they could get it too, and went on and on about handwashing and eating right etc. ya know, when your kid has a chronic disease, like crohn's, and has to have infusions that take take 4 hours, and he has to have them every 8 weeks - he's not going to get perfect attendance no matter how many times he washes his hands or how many apples a day he eats. That irritated me.

And now the middle school is tying perfect attendance and no disciplinary referrals into a dance. so now my child will be lumped together with the trouble makers because of a condition outside his control. That I have an issue with. An award at the end of the year or 9-weeks? Go for it! Honor those who earned it most definitely - but don't berate and lecture and exclude those who didn't - because some of these kids have no choice.

mommaFruFru
by Gold Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:50 AM
I completely agree with you!

The *award every one* mentality us one reason we don't put the kids in mist sports.. if my kid sucks I want the coach to tell him! Nit give him some crap award!
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Mama2ETA
by Bronze Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:54 AM
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 I cannot stand the entitled mentality. Not everyone is a winner at everything. Everyone has their day to shine. I hate *yes, hate* when they give every child in sports a trophy or medal. It defeats the purpose. Isn't the purpose to show those that thrived in that area how amazing they did? For attendance, it IS the same thing. Yes, some kids get sick, some have bad immune systems (my 1st grader and K have missed school both years for my 1st grader and this year for my K because they get sick easily) but it doesn't matter. The kids who are at school every day deserve to be rewarded for their constant effort!

Mama2ETA
by Bronze Member on Jan. 26, 2013 at 9:55 AM
3 moms liked this

 Also, this mentality is setting up their kids to have culture shock and have a higher failure rate when they go into the real world. I hate to see what work ethic is going to mean in 10-20 years. Makes me very sad.

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