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Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

Should I be proud or upset? **UPDATE**

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Today I got a note from the teacher saying, "punched child in stomached because child took his lunch card." when I read that I stared laughing. I did speak with him and told him while I'm proud of him for standing up for himself next time he should inform a grown-up. When I was little I was taught that if some one messes with you or picks on you to "give them hell" while I never told my son that to me another person taking his lunch card is the equivilat of them taking his lunch money. I know the other child couldn't use it but also why did the kid take it from my DS in the first place?

**UPDATE**Okay first of all I read the posts and I saw alot of moms are saying I am raising a bully. Okay that's your opinion and you are entitled to it. We do not teach to hit first but if push comes to shove then what else is there to do? I did speak with my son about walking away first and letting a teacher or adult know what was going on. While I was taught to fight back I tell my son ONLY and if the child hits him more than once or pursuse him after he walks away from them. I did not laugh about the note infront of him I was actually in another room when I read the note. When I was my sons age I got picked on and hit quite a bit but never hit back and told the teacher and I was branded a "tattletale". Some of you out there are probably familiar with that term. I was always picked on but because I never EVER did anything about it. I was a constant target all through elementary school up until the day I got beat up because some other kids thought they wouldn't get in trouble for doing it. So yeah I would rather my son NOT experience alot of the same that I went through so excuse me if I am a little proud that my son won't take being bullied laying down. I did speak with the teacher and apparently this child who took my sons card from him has been messing with him at school and the teacher does keep them apart but that particular day the child decided to get out of his place in line to walk over and snatch the card from my son. So really who is the bully? Thank you all for your replys wheather they are supportive or not.

by on Jan. 30, 2013 at 5:10 AM
Replies (111-118):
maxswolfsuit
by Max on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:08 PM
1 mom liked this

I am so confused about why some moms think it's "obvious" the other child is a bully. 

All the post says is that the child took the lunch card. It could have been as simple as, "Hey let me see your picture." I am baffled as to how taking a card out of some one's hand warrants a punch in the stomach.

If the child was threatening the OP's child why wouldn't she have told us that in the OP?

Quoting churchlady08:

Which is why I am glad we homeschool.  And--I would have been proud if it had been my child because it is obvious that this kid who took it was a bully and probably threatening your child in the first place and since the administration tends to look the other way in cases like this, all the more reason for your child to look out for themselves.  No, violence doesn't solve anything but, in this world that we live in today, you have to look out for yourself.  Enough said!


maxswolfsuit
by Max on Feb. 2, 2013 at 12:09 PM


Quoting bizkit_fanky:

I never said I would be proud if dd punched someone....But, I would be happy she stood up for herself, rather than dealing with the same bs every single day....When kids see another child not defend themself......They think easy target....If someone thinks dd is a lil bully for taking up for herself then so be it....Maybe they will think twice before picking on her...

And as it's been pointed out over and over in this post there are many ways to stick up for yourself that don't involve punching someone in the stomach. 

MsLogansMommy
by Bronze Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 1:21 PM

and to just add on to this post that I completely agree with there are soooo many children now that are being diagnosed with ADHD and other disorders that have amazing problems with impulse control and they would likely take a card from someone just to see it and then hand it back (I am not saying that is okay but it is absolutely nothing near bullying) so therefore the child who's card got taken may be annoyed but certainly is in no threat of physical danger  


Quoting maxswolfsuit:

I am so confused about why some moms think it's "obvious" the other child is a bully. 

All the post says is that the child took the lunch card. It could have been as simple as, "Hey let me see your picture." I am baffled as to how taking a card out of some one's hand warrants a punch in the stomach.

If the child was threatening the OP's child why wouldn't she have told us that in the OP?

Quoting churchlady08:

Which is why I am glad we homeschool.  And--I would have been proud if it had been my child because it is obvious that this kid who took it was a bully and probably threatening your child in the first place and since the administration tends to look the other way in cases like this, all the more reason for your child to look out for themselves.  No, violence doesn't solve anything but, in this world that we live in today, you have to look out for yourself.  Enough said!



 

MsLogansMommy
by Bronze Member on Feb. 2, 2013 at 1:30 PM
2 moms liked this

 ok since we do not know the whole store lets assume for the sake of this question that we know for sure this is a one time incident and that the child who took the card has never interacted with the kid who punched before then would your answer be different? I understand what your saying no one wants their child to be a target for bullying but I am going to make up a fake post right now about what the other parent might have posted if they were on this board and tell me how this sounds.

My son was at school today and he is the nicest sweetest child but he is very impulsive and during lunchtime he was in line with another little boy my son saw the boys lunch card in his hand and since he had never seen one before he wanted to look at it and without thinking he just grabbed it while he was handing it back to the little boy the child punched him really hard in the stomach and then laughed and all the other kids in line also laughed and now he doesnt want to go back to school he is very sad and doesnt understand why that little boy did that

So now do you see how the other side of the coin may look although we all agree the child should not have taken the lunch card the truth is kids do that all the time they are impulsive and learning how to control themselves it is not a skill most children are innately born with. But that hardly makes him a bully

 


Quoting bizkit_fanky:

I never said I would be proud if dd punched someone....But, I would be happy she stood up for herself, rather than dealing with the same bs every single day....When kids see another child not defend themself......They think easy target....If someone thinks dd is a lil bully for taking up for herself then so be it....Maybe they will think twice before picking on her...


 

maxswolfsuit
by Max on Feb. 2, 2013 at 2:25 PM

It makes me sad to think of the world kids are growing up in nowadays. They can't even interact with each other. This is why kids don't have social skills. As soon as they make a simple mistake, like taking a card to look at it, they are labeled as a bully and deserve a punch in the stomach. So many kids have just stopped making any kind of effort because the expectations for how they should get along are completely unreasonable. 

If kids are going to interact they are going to be rude and thoughtless at times. They are kids. Adults need to stop expecting them to be perfect. 

Quoting MsLogansMommy:

and to just add on to this post that I completely agree with there are soooo many children now that are being diagnosed with ADHD and other disorders that have amazing problems with impulse control and they would likely take a card from someone just to see it and then hand it back (I am not saying that is okay but it is absolutely nothing near bullying) so therefore the child who's card got taken may be annoyed but certainly is in no threat of physical danger  


Quoting maxswolfsuit:

I am so confused about why some moms think it's "obvious" the other child is a bully. 

All the post says is that the child took the lunch card. It could have been as simple as, "Hey let me see your picture." I am baffled as to how taking a card out of some one's hand warrants a punch in the stomach.

If the child was threatening the OP's child why wouldn't she have told us that in the OP?

Quoting churchlady08:

Which is why I am glad we homeschool.  And--I would have been proud if it had been my child because it is obvious that this kid who took it was a bully and probably threatening your child in the first place and since the administration tends to look the other way in cases like this, all the more reason for your child to look out for themselves.  No, violence doesn't solve anything but, in this world that we live in today, you have to look out for yourself.  Enough said!





cjsbmom
by on Feb. 2, 2013 at 2:40 PM
1 mom liked this

 Agreed.

Quoting Lslk:

I would not be proud. If there is a problem the first course of action is to tell the Teacher. If it continues to happen then tell me and i will go to the school. If it still happens then I tell my child to stand up for themselves. To me if the school isn't going to take care of it then the child has every right to stand up for themselves. If this was my child and they did not tell the Teacher before they punched someone for a lunch card then my child should get punished. Yes it is not right that the other child took the lunch card but come on it was just a lunch card and the other child may have been just playing around. I sure as heck wouldn't have been laughing about it either. It was ,after all, just a lunch card. What does he do if someone pushs him down?

 

Barabell
by Barbara on Feb. 3, 2013 at 11:30 AM


Quoting MsLogansMommy:

It is so sad reading replies from parents that think this behavior is something to be proud of. A healthy well rounded child that is not a push over or target for bullying is what we all seek for our children but I think some people have taken it to the extreme to make sure their kid doesnt get bullied they become the bully and that is hypocritical and not helping your children grow into healthy functioning adults.

I agree 100% with your sentiment.

midjet117
by on Feb. 3, 2013 at 1:15 PM
I agree. It's not like the kid attacked him or anything. I think if that's something you're proud of then you're only going to raise a bully

Quoting barrelracer1699:

I don't agree that someone taking his lunch card was punch worthy. In a case like that he needs to inform an adult!

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