A little help needed, sex and kids when is it too much?
I'm new here and here I am introducing myself with a heavy subject! gahhhh! But, I figure this is probably the best place to ask.. it might be long winded, bare with me.
My friend son had sex-ed in school, he was about 9. He came home and told his younger brothers and sisters AND my son (I never LET him play there and the ONE time I did.!!!) In graphic detail also told them about anal sex. I discovered this when my then FOUR year old drew a picture and told us all about it. I was mortified that he was told this way and shortly after he started masturbating.. All in all we handled it well, and my son is very balanced about it and is now 9 himself.
Fast forward - They moved and so I didn't see much of them. But I invited them all over for a halloween party (last year) Both the parents and the kids in that house had told me about this kids masturbating a lot, and they have a full house so they were part teasing but also part, you can't keep doing this! -- I'm just watching and observing I too don't have the answers and its... well.. you know...
BUT--- while he was here I noticed a pair of knickers on the floor, I thought they were mine dropped from the washing so I scooped them up and put them in my pocket. It was only after the kids left that I realized they were not mine.. the were adult size and very likely belong to his mum
Alarm bells go off when I realized. I'm thinking future pervert, future rapist. His brothers have told me he talks about sex with animals and what would it be like.. his parents KNOW that part.. they don't know about hte underwear though
If I tell them, the dad is very strict, shouts, scare me even. I feel their punishment or reaction will certainly be over the top.. but then again, in this situation, what counts as over the top.. I just know if I tell them they will flip! If I don't tell them.. I mean HOW VITAL is this information.. is it fairly normal for young boys with a high sex drive to do this.. is it harmless, or is it typical behavior of someone who goes on to become a preditor?
Please do not critisize me for I've never been a parent before, I'm learning on the job JUST like everyone else. By all means vent your opinion but please don't get personal or nasty about I know its a "oh my god" subject. I need help, not critizism.