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School lunch gripe - Asperger's Child

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Ok, I have a huge gripe!!!  We are in Michigan, and we have had a few snow days.  We get a monthly schedule of the lunches, and without any notice, the school changed the menu a few times.  

When you have an ASD child, you have to prep them for many things during the day.  And a lunch that they dont like can cause a HUGE meltdown.  Luckily, his teacher called me last week, and I was able to run a cold lunch to him.  I thought of the others that arent so lucky.  

So my question is, am I being silly to be cranky on their deviation from the printed lunch schedule?  There are very few things my son will eat, and we have a peanut allergy, so school provided PB&J is NOT an option.  

And since I am one to offer suggestions to help solve a problem, any ideas on how I could approach this?


by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:05 PM
Replies (11-20):
kjbugsmom1517
by Bronze Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:42 PM
Wow yea very unrealistic. Autistic kids have to learn that the world doesnt revolve around them and their potential for a meltdown over a change. Lunch menus change it happens. Send their lunch if its a concern then there is no potential for a meltdown.
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Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:45 PM
Why should she have to always pack his lunch if he's willing to eat some school lunches? It's very understandable for her to be concerned. Part of his NEED to exist as peacefully as possible is to have routine. Just because his issue isn't a physical reaction that could lead to death like allergies, it is VITAL to his success to have things be like they are expected to be. Yes, he is most likely learning coping skills but mom's request isn't ridiculous by any stretch. We all want our children to have success at school and in life

What I would do is go speak to the lunchroom manager and see if she will email you the day before if things change. Explain your situation and see if she'll work with you. I'm sure there are other parents that would like to know if changes occur. Maybe the manager would do a daily email with menu for the next day for any interested parents.

Maybe even offer to be in charge of the list or whatever.
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mjande4
by Platinum Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:48 PM
3 moms liked this

This is very unrealistic.  Depending on how big the school district is, the lunch menu probably isn't even generated at the site, but at the district office.  To expect a classfied, most likely part time, employee to email you the menu so that your child doesn't have a meltdown is asking way too much.  This is one of those life lessons that the child either has to learn to roll with it or pack their lunch.  There are too many variables outside of the actual lunch manager's control.


Quoting Andrewsmom70:

Why should she have to always pack his lunch if he's willing to eat some school lunches? It's very understandable for her to be concerned. Part of his NEED to exist as peacefully as possible is to have routine. Just because his issue isn't a physical reaction that could lead to death like allergies, it is VITAL to his success to have things be like they are expected to be. Yes, he is most likely learning coping skills but mom's request isn't ridiculous by any stretch. We all want our children to have success at school and in life

What I would do is go speak to the lunchroom manager and see if she will email you the day before if things change. Explain your situation and see if she'll work with you. I'm sure there are other parents that would like to know if changes occur. Maybe the manager would do a daily email with menu for the next day for any interested parents.

Maybe even offer to be in charge of the list or whatever.



SahmTam
by Tammy on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:50 PM

 My son is on the spectrum, too, and would have the same issue. I would just pack every day. Luckily, our school has stuck to their menu every day since he was in 1st grade (he's in 6th now)!

Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:51 PM
I just disagree. Other adjustments have been made that may have seemed ridiculous at one time but are standard now.

We make these types of accommodations all the time in the classroom for kids. Why should lunchtime be any different?


Quoting mjande4:

This is very unrealistic.  Depending on how big the school district is, the lunch menu probably isn't even generated at the site, but at the district office.  To expect a classfied, most likely part time, employee to email you the menu so that your child doesn't have a meltdown is asking way too much.  This is one of those life lessons that the child either has to learn to roll with it or pack their lunch.  There are too many variables outside of the actual lunch manager's control.



Quoting Andrewsmom70:

Why should she have to always pack his lunch if he's willing to eat some school lunches? It's very understandable for her to be concerned. Part of his NEED to exist as peacefully as possible is to have routine. Just because his issue isn't a physical reaction that could lead to death like allergies, it is VITAL to his success to have things be like they are expected to be. Yes, he is most likely learning coping skills but mom's request isn't ridiculous by any stretch. We all want our children to have success at school and in life



What I would do is go speak to the lunchroom manager and see if she will email you the day before if things change. Explain your situation and see if she'll work with you. I'm sure there are other parents that would like to know if changes occur. Maybe the manager would do a daily email with menu for the next day for any interested parents.



Maybe even offer to be in charge of the list or whatever.





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OneDay.
by on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:52 PM
1 mom liked this
I would just send lunch from now on
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mjande4
by Platinum Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:55 PM

Because it's simply NOT realistic.  There are many things that go into producing food on site.  It's not a short order kitchen.  This is NOT the same as requesting your child sit in the front of the class because they have a difficult time seeing.  I can guarantee you that the school will tell her the same thing as the rest of us, PACK HIS LUNCH and move on.

Quoting Andrewsmom70:


I just disagree. Other adjustments have been made that may have seemed ridiculous at one time but are standard now.

We make these types of accommodations all the time in the classroom for kids. Why should lunchtime be any different?


Quoting mjande4:

This is very unrealistic.  Depending on how big the school district is, the lunch menu probably isn't even generated at the site, but at the district office.  To expect a classfied, most likely part time, employee to email you the menu so that your child doesn't have a meltdown is asking way too much.  This is one of those life lessons that the child either has to learn to roll with it or pack their lunch.  There are too many variables outside of the actual lunch manager's control.



Quoting Andrewsmom70:

Why should she have to always pack his lunch if he's willing to eat some school lunches? It's very understandable for her to be concerned. Part of his NEED to exist as peacefully as possible is to have routine. Just because his issue isn't a physical reaction that could lead to death like allergies, it is VITAL to his success to have things be like they are expected to be. Yes, he is most likely learning coping skills but mom's request isn't ridiculous by any stretch. We all want our children to have success at school and in life



What I would do is go speak to the lunchroom manager and see if she will email you the day before if things change. Explain your situation and see if she'll work with you. I'm sure there are other parents that would like to know if changes occur. Maybe the manager would do a daily email with menu for the next day for any interested parents.



Maybe even offer to be in charge of the list or whatever.







A_McCool
by Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 7:56 PM

  I remember one time I almost melted down at school over lunch.  My dad packed my lunch instead of my mom.  He thought he was being nice, and he cut into quarters.  My mom never did that.  I wasn't expecting it, and I dropped half of it on the floor when I pulled it out of my lunch box;  I was livid.  I remember talking about it for weeks; I think I was in the 6th grade.


Andrewsmom70
by Silver Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 8:01 PM
She's not asking for a short order kitchen. She's simply asking for notice if menu changes occur. There's a HUGE DIFFERENCE.


Quoting mjande4:

Because it's simply NOT realistic.  There are many things that go into producing food on site.  It's not a short order kitchen.  This is NOT the same as requesting your child sit in the front of the class because they have a difficult time seeing.  I can guarantee you that the school will tell her the same thing as the rest of us, PACK HIS LUNCH and move on.

Quoting Andrewsmom70:


I just disagree. Other adjustments have been made that may have seemed ridiculous at one time but are standard now.



We make these types of accommodations all the time in the classroom for kids. Why should lunchtime be any different?





Quoting mjande4:

This is very unrealistic.  Depending on how big the school district is, the lunch menu probably isn't even generated at the site, but at the district office.  To expect a classfied, most likely part time, employee to email you the menu so that your child doesn't have a meltdown is asking way too much.  This is one of those life lessons that the child either has to learn to roll with it or pack their lunch.  There are too many variables outside of the actual lunch manager's control.




Quoting Andrewsmom70:

Why should she have to always pack his lunch if he's willing to eat some school lunches? It's very understandable for her to be concerned. Part of his NEED to exist as peacefully as possible is to have routine. Just because his issue isn't a physical reaction that could lead to death like allergies, it is VITAL to his success to have things be like they are expected to be. Yes, he is most likely learning coping skills but mom's request isn't ridiculous by any stretch. We all want our children to have success at school and in life





What I would do is go speak to the lunchroom manager and see if she will email you the day before if things change. Explain your situation and see if she'll work with you. I'm sure there are other parents that would like to know if changes occur. Maybe the manager would do a daily email with menu for the next day for any interested parents.





Maybe even offer to be in charge of the list or whatever.











Posted on the NEW CafeMom Mobile
mjande4
by Platinum Member on Feb. 5, 2013 at 8:05 PM
1 mom liked this

NOT the cafeteria's job!  Things happen just like in the classroom, lessons change.  Her son needs to either learn to deal with it or PACK A LUNCH!  It's not rocket science!


Quoting Andrewsmom70:

She's not asking for a short order kitchen. She's simply asking for notice if menu changes occur. There's a HUGE DIFFERENCE.


Quoting mjande4:

Because it's simply NOT realistic.  There are many things that go into producing food on site.  It's not a short order kitchen.  This is NOT the same as requesting your child sit in the front of the class because they have a difficult time seeing.  I can guarantee you that the school will tell her the same thing as the rest of us, PACK HIS LUNCH and move on.

Quoting Andrewsmom70:


I just disagree. Other adjustments have been made that may have seemed ridiculous at one time but are standard now.



We make these types of accommodations all the time in the classroom for kids. Why should lunchtime be any different?





Quoting mjande4:

This is very unrealistic.  Depending on how big the school district is, the lunch menu probably isn't even generated at the site, but at the district office.  To expect a classfied, most likely part time, employee to email you the menu so that your child doesn't have a meltdown is asking way too much.  This is one of those life lessons that the child either has to learn to roll with it or pack their lunch.  There are too many variables outside of the actual lunch manager's control.




Quoting Andrewsmom70:

Why should she have to always pack his lunch if he's willing to eat some school lunches? It's very understandable for her to be concerned. Part of his NEED to exist as peacefully as possible is to have routine. Just because his issue isn't a physical reaction that could lead to death like allergies, it is VITAL to his success to have things be like they are expected to be. Yes, he is most likely learning coping skills but mom's request isn't ridiculous by any stretch. We all want our children to have success at school and in life





What I would do is go speak to the lunchroom manager and see if she will email you the day before if things change. Explain your situation and see if she'll work with you. I'm sure there are other parents that would like to know if changes occur. Maybe the manager would do a daily email with menu for the next day for any interested parents.





Maybe even offer to be in charge of the list or whatever.













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