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Home work debate at my home

Posted by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 7:25 AM
  • 32 Replies

My husband and I have a different views on homework. My husband feels that it is our eight year old son responsible in complete and let us know if he has homework. When my husband checks his homework he does not tell our son what he did wrong. My husband just return assignment to our son tell him that he did it wrong and let him figure the mistake he made in his homework.

I go in my son folder and also check his planner. If he  has problem or do assignment that is wrong I mark and tell him to do it over. I feel as parent it is my responsible to make sure he does his homework

What are your views on homework ?

by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 7:25 AM
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by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 7:30 AM
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this is our run down. DS gets home and has to do his work right away. then i ask him about it. what did you read, tell me about your math, as I look it over. while we engage in convo I will point out things he may have needed help in. Hes a rusher, he knows answers but doesnt always take the time to correctly complete things. Then we are done. his father doesnt do a darn thing. and his step dad participants in the discussion. he also plans to help him when he gets into history at school (1st grade still) We feel re-enforcing lessons at home is important to the learning process. It's not just checking the work it making sure he is understanding it. 

by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 7:56 AM

When they're younger, I do what you do.  I check what they did, erase the wrong answers and they do it over.  Mine are in 3rd and 4th grade now and they do their work and put it away.  I don't even check it.  If they didn't complete it or they got some wrong, it's their responsibility.  If they get a bad grade, they get in trouble.  Then I bring it back around and say that they have to be careful with their work and make sure they check it over to see if all of the answers are right.  Their teachers know I do this and agree with me.

"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19

by Tammy on Feb. 8, 2013 at 8:21 AM

 I've always had to help my oldest more. He's on the autism spectrum and has struggled quite a bit over the years. If he gets to doing something wrong (especially math) he will have that wrong way stuck in his head and it's a mess to untangle. He often has a hard time recalling everything he learned in school about the subject, especially when it is new and they've only been doing it for a day. I don't by any means do his work, I just work very hard to clarify everything for him so that he doesn't get wrong info cemented in his head lol, and so that he will have confidence when he has to take a test and, of course, do the work all alone.

My younger two are super independent. I check over their work to make sure it's done and mostly right. If they would totally screw it up (has never happened, just a hypothetical... lol) I'd go over with them and have them correct it, but for now I just let it slide if 1 or 2 are wrong.

I also hear what each teacher has to say about it at Back to School Night. We've had some teachers that want parents to be very hands off-- let them totally do it alone and if it's totally wrong the teacher will have a true idea of where the child's at (doesn't work well for my oldest, but do this with my younger two at the teacher's request).

BUT, we also have teachers who want heavy parent involvement to the point where they set homework up in such a way that you have to be there helping to be able to sign off on the assignments. My oldest's teacher this year even said that since the math books are online parents don't have the excuse that they don't know how to do the math and that they should look up how it's being taught in order to help with math homework. In my experience more teachers have favored a more "hands off" approach, though.

by Ruby Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 8:42 AM

 I double-check dd's homework (not that she gets very much)- she's in 1st gr. I will sometimes check over ds2's homework, and if I find any mistakes (usually math), I'll point it out and have him redo it, but since he's in 3rd gr, I check it less than I used to.

I don't really check ds1's anymore- I ask what homework he has in each class, and I'll ask if he did each thing when he says he's done, but that's about it. I'll help if he asks me to, but that's pretty much limited to his Spanish homework. He's in 8th gr.






by Bronze Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 8:56 AM

He's eight.  It's time for him to start taking responsibility for it. 

by Platinum Member on Feb. 8, 2013 at 9:10 AM
I do a little of both. Sometimes I let them suffer the consequences of not being responsible and sometimes I step in. DS is in middle school and I kept being warned how muc homework they would have. He doesn't seem to have/do much but he's an honor student so I don't get on him like I used to.
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by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 9:11 AM
We have always had teachers tell us not to correct homework. If we correct it, they won't know what the kids don't understand, and what they need help with.
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by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 9:13 AM

I make sure everything is done and done correctly. He gives me his agenda and points balance sheet to sign them.

by Queen25Princes on Feb. 8, 2013 at 9:17 AM


by on Feb. 8, 2013 at 9:22 AM
My kids are 9 and 10. At about 8 we stopped hovering over their homework. For DD9, I have to sign her agenda and reading log, so I glance at her homework. If things are wrong, it depends...if the whole math is wrong, I go over it with her, if she gives me a hard time at all(I have issues with her attitude when I'm trying to help her, we butt heads a lot) I let her bring it to her teacher and tell her she's not understanding. If she doesn't approach her teacher, I let the teacher know to approach her (we have had lots of issues with this teacher and DD not feeling comfortable in her classroom so she won't ask the teacher for help). If DD just gets one thing wrong and I know she can figure it out, I just say '#2 isn't right' and then she snaps at me and I walk away. She then figures it out most of the time after she calms herself down.

DS10 is now in middle school and they don't have us sign anything. So I never know if he had homework or not, he gets it done during their kind of study hall time at the end of the day. I don't see most of it ever. He now has a workbook he has to do a couple pages in after school if he doesn't bring home homework (trying to encourage study habits DH and I were never taught). His teacher are overly in love with him and think he can do no wrong, which you think would be a good thing but it's really annoying bc he is so far ahead, he should be held to a higher standard than his peers but he is not, they just think he's so great and can never make a mistake, so he rushes through things and doesn't do his best bc the teachers don't expect any more of him.

I think at 8 they should be doing their homework, then you check it over and let them know which numbers are wrong, and sometimes don't even tell him, just let the teacher go over it with him. If he asks for help be there and help, but make sure he is still responsible for it.
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