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Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

How is it so different?

Posted by on Feb. 9, 2013 at 5:47 AM
  • 115 Replies
5 moms liked this

I am very curious to know why parents think they can tell teachers how to run their classrooms but these same parents would have a fit if someone told them how to run their house?

Teachers go to school for a long time to specialize in teaching your precious Suzy/Tommy Snowflake. This is their JOB/CARRER and most would not do anything that would jeopardize their lively hood. But parents see one little thing they don't like or understand and they think the teacher is a NAZI (SFAP) or that the teacher has no right to implement rules in their own classroom.

How is it sooooo different from someone that does not have your experience to tell you that you are too strict/ not strict enough or doing everything ALL wrong in your own home?

I know your Suzy/Tommy Snowflake is so special that no one should be able to tell them what to do but YOU. But what happens when Suzy/Tommy comes in contact with other authority figures in the real world? Do they have the right to tell them what to do?

 




Cindy

by on Feb. 9, 2013 at 5:47 AM
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maxswolfsuit
by Max on Feb. 9, 2013 at 7:10 AM
6 moms liked this

Good point. 

There are so many things that parents don't realize or take into consideration. Look at my post about make up work. At least 3 moms replied that it never occurred to them doing makeup work doesn't really make up for the instruction missed in school. Sometimes what seems obvious to parents isn't really the way it is. 

It would be nice if before parents flew off the handle and assumed the teacher is being unreasonable if they would just ask why the teacher does what she does. Most of the time there is a very good reason that hasn't occurred to the parent. 

mjande4
by Platinum Member on Feb. 9, 2013 at 8:55 AM
4 moms liked this

Excellent post!  Parents also have a myopic view of the classroom/school. They look from their experiences.  School has changed dramatically since we were kids and even in the past 5 + years.  I have taught for 20 and due to society changes, many procedures have changed in that time.  The bathroom is one of those.  The most common place for bullying/drugs/assault/graffiti, etc.  is in the bathroom.  There is a reason that teachers do not just "let" kids go at their leisure.  They HAVE to have some safety procedures in place.  The same moms that get their "panties in a bunch" over junior not getting to just leave the classroom when they want are the same ones that would scream bloody murder if their child was picked on in the restroom.  It's a balancing act for the teachers.  I find that the moms that tend to "Monday morning quarterback" on here are NOT ones that spend any time IN the classroom.  Ones that volunteer regularly have an entirely different perspective, albeit usually an accurate one.

Morrigan333
by on Feb. 9, 2013 at 10:06 AM
1 mom liked this

I think it's parents like myself that are upset with teachers that seem to take NO HEED to the insights we're trying to give into the world of our "special" kids. By special I mean the kid has an IEP or a 504 plan or some kind of BPIS in place to help that struggling kid. These teachers seem to EXPECT the brain/body of EVERY kid to work just the same as every other kid. It doesn't work that way. I think teachers should take courses in college (and get a degree with it) such as Specil Education, Early childhood development, and Psychology.

mjande4
by Platinum Member on Feb. 9, 2013 at 10:20 AM
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Quoting Morrigan333:

I think it's parents like myself that are upset with teachers that seem to take NO HEED to the insights we're trying to give into the world of our "special" kids. By special I mean the kid has an IEP or a 504 plan or some kind of BPIS in place to help that struggling kid. These teachers seem to EXPECT the brain/body of EVERY kid to work just the same as every other kid. It doesn't work that way. I think teachers should take courses in college (and get a degree with it) such as Specil Education, Early childhood development, and Psychology.



To become a CERTIFIED teacher you DO take COLLEGE courses. Psychology is included in all of the programs, undergraduate AND graduate, that I have seen. Special education and early childhood specific courses for those that plan to be endorsed in those areas, although most programs have a course with an overview in SPED. My point being, this is already STANDARD practice. Part of the inclusion model, which many parents of SPED students insist upon, is functioning as a regular student in a regular classroom.
jaytee
by Jen on Feb. 9, 2013 at 10:33 AM
This is a good point. I agree with you mostly. I've only ever questioned a teacher when she told me she didn't have time for reminders.
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HH6
by Member on Feb. 9, 2013 at 10:38 AM
4 moms liked this

Oh my goodness, thank you!  In order to spend my day with roughly 150 preteens who are known for their eye rolling, drama, and generally difficult attitudes the world over, I HAVE to love them.  And I do....every single eye rolling, back talking, difficult adolescent in my room is someone's baby who has within them the potential to become someone incredible. I teach because I believe this and I believe in my students.  That does not change the fact that in order for them to reach their potential I must push them soemtimes, I must discipline them sometimes and I must be that "mean teacher" that forces them to face the consequences for bad behavior or not turning in their work.  I wish parents understood that I want the SAME THINGS they do for their child - for them to be their best selves. I have a BA and a Masters and 14 years of experience with kids from all backgrounds with every level of ability.  I know what I am doing and I want the best for your child:  Trust me.

 Help me by telling me about your child but don't tell me how to run my classroom or teach my curriculum.  When I take my vehicle to a mechanic, I tell him what sounds it is making, how it behaves, what we have had done in the past, etc. but I do NOT tell him how to work on it.  The same is true with your child - help a teacher by giving honest info about your child but trust the teacher to make professional decisions.  I don't always love that mechanic when he tells me the bill is going to be painful and the fix difficult but if he is good, I know he is right. The same is true for education - you may not like the consequences your child must face or the difficulty of the work but if your teacher is a good teacher, they are doing it for the benefit of your child.  

And yes, there are some bad teachers out there.  But most of us are good - we love your kids, we work hard, we make hard decisions and we want the very best for your children, just like you do. Work with us and trust that we are professionals at what we do. 

steelcrazy
by Emerald Member on Feb. 9, 2013 at 10:45 AM
3 moms liked this

Here is a little tid bit that I've learned over the years.  Fixing every little things for your child and constantly catering to their every want and desire is doing absolutely nothing to help them.  Eventually they will have to face the music and the sooner that it happens, the easier it will be on everyone.

Jinx-Troublex3
by Platinum Member on Feb. 9, 2013 at 11:01 AM
1 mom liked this

There is a HUGE difference between "fixing every little thing" and trying to work WITH a teacher to help your child.

When DS changed schools in 1st grade, he was in the process of being evaluated for ADHD, he had serious issues in behavior at the school we left (we found due to sensory issues) and I tried to take the teacher aside and let her know what was going on, give her my contact info, let her know I wanted to be part of a TEAM for DS.

Her statement? Oh, Mom's sugar coat everything, and I see the REAL thing.  I don't want to talk to you until I have a chnce to see for myself what is going on" and she turned and walked away from me @@ DAY 1...It never got any better and she bullied and harassed Ds until he was asking, "Why did God make me so stupid?"   I had to work with him nightly to keep him at grade level because he was put in the corner of the room and ignored as "the bad kid" @@

I wanted nothing more for him to "face the music" and be a normal kid, held to task but helped as needed, not tossed aside.

Quoting steelcrazy:

Here is a little tid bit that I've learned over the years.  Fixing every little things for your child and constantly catering to their every want and desire is doing absolutely nothing to help them.  Eventually they will have to face the music and the sooner that it happens, the easier it will be on everyone.



Jinx - Homeschooling, Scouting & Karate butt-kicking  Mom to Star Scout Ian 1/98, Scout Sean 9/00, Junior GS Heidi 4/03. Wife to Joe & Alpha to German Shepherd Spazz.

Jinx-Troublex3
by Platinum Member on Feb. 9, 2013 at 11:03 AM

I wonder, if we would be where we are today, and homeschooling, if I got a techer that was willing to work with DS not just toss him aside. However, that has turned DS into the hard worker and sensitive person he is now because he sees when ther kids hurt like he did!

coolmommy2x
by Gold Member on Feb. 9, 2013 at 11:19 AM
I only see this here. IRL, I have never seen a parent confront a teacher like moms here claim to. I live in an awesome district with amazing teachers. We didn't like DS's teacher at all but I will say, she did work with us. Not effectively but she did try.

On CM, so many moms believe their kids are perfect because they are perfect moms so how could their kids not be? It MUST be the teacher's fault.

I don't get it either.
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