I have 2 boys (son and SS) that are in 2 different grades at 2 different schools. We have the complete opposite problem going on with both of them and it seems neither school is stepping up and working to resolve the issues. At this point, I don't need advice (YET) I think I just need to vent before I have a mental breakdown. Between buying a house, wedding planning and the problems with the schools I want to break down and cry. I think I'll only explain the issue with my youngest now, otherwise it will seem like a freaking novel and I'm sure no one will read it!
My Son is 7 and in 1st grade. His issue involves another little boy in his class. This little boy tries to "Fight" my son almost daily. Throwing punches and acting like a karate kid. They have been in class together since Kindergarten and it's happened on and off since then, but lately it's been getting worse.
In the beginning of the year he shoved my son into his locker and my son had to write a paper on "proper hallway behavior". The teacher wouldn't even give him a chance to explain himself. Last week he tackled my son at recess and smashed his face into the snow. He's thrown ice chunks at him during recess. I *Think* he does it out of play, but my Son says he's "afraid of getting hurt and in trouble and he's nervous to go to school because he doesn't want J to do it again".
My son has taken some Karate self defense classes and knows how to block the punches and I've told him to say "No, J", block anything that gets thrown his way and walk away. He's been doing that for about 2 weeks now and almost daily comes home saying they got in trouble for fighting. He swears he did exactly what I told him to do, but he's still getting in trouble. Getting in trouble for defending himself!
We met with the teacher about it last week. The teacher was flaky about the whole thing and kept changing the subject to my son being easily distracted while doing worksheets. After about 30 min of us bringing the focus back to the subject of the "bullying", the teacher said that he would make sure they are separated in line, aren't sitting near each other, have a talk with both boys and pay closer attention to them. Well, yesterday it happened again. In line. They weren't separated and the boy turned around and started throwing punches. Dawson blocked them and yelled "No, J". They both got yelled at and sent to the back of the line...together.
I'm pissed that this is continuing. Why is nothing happening to this boy that is THROWING PUNCHES at my son?! Why is my Son getting in trouble for defending himself? Why is the teacher not following through with what he said he was going to do?? We are supposedly a "No tolerance" school, but this has been tolerated since the beginning of the year and it's getting old. Even if it is out of play, no child should be allowed to throw punches at another child, repeatedly.
I'm to the point that I just want to tell my son to punch this kid. If he's going to get in trouble, might as well get in trouble for actually doing something and maybe punching him will get this kid to stop messing with him.
I've mostly been dealing with it in the past because my DF (son's Dad) has been pretty pissed off about it and I'm better at the initial approach. Well now Daddy Bear has stepped in and has sent an email to the teacher and has a draft email written up to send to the principal if the teacher still won't do anything about it. Sigh.
If you've made it this far, thank you! I know it's a long read but I feel much better getting it out!