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going to his first birthday party

Posted by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 2:12 PM
  • 16 Replies

SS5 is so excited, because tomorrow is his close friend’s birthday. He’s been invited to a few birthday parties, but it was just an ‘I have to invite you, because you’re also in my class invite’. This will be his first time celebrating his friend’s birthday.


Anyways, we’re going after school today to find the ‘perfect birthday present’. SS has been talking about how he wants to get his friend an expensive monster truck, but I’ve been trying to explain to him that we don’t have enough money to buy something too expensive. He seems to understand that we can’t buy him (SS) toys all the time, but he doesn’t get why we can’t buy an expensive toy for his ‘second best friend’s birthday!’


He’s also expressed a concern about DH and I leaving him at the birthday party. I know he’s excited and will be surrounded with his classmates, but he kept asking DH and I about staying at the party too.


Here are my questions for you guys – How much do you usually spend on a classmate’s birthday gift? Do you usually get a gift, or just a card? Do you usually stay for the party, or leave and come back at the pickup time (the invitation only has a starting time)? If the entire class is invited, do your kids go the party? Or do they just go to their close friend’s party?

by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 2:12 PM
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by Emerald Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 2:51 PM

I normally spend $20-$25 on a gift.  If we know what the child really likes or wants, then I will buy that, otherwise I get a gift card.  Target has a lot of monster trucks (matchbox size) and accessories that are reasonably priced, so that could be an option if the friend is really into that.

When the kids are that young, a lot of the parents do stick around at the party.  So if SS is more comfortable with that, I would stay.

by Barbara on Mar. 1, 2013 at 4:26 PM

I usually spend $20 on the gift. Either we'll buy a cheap card (like for a $1) or my son will make a card.

I would usually keep my schedule free during the party time. When dropping him off, I would see if the parents needed any help. If they did not, I would leave and enjoy the break.

by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 4:30 PM

We've done 2 parties for classmates so far, and both times I stayed because it was an activity thing. First was mini-golf and a lot of parents left, I stayed because the mom could use the help. The second one was a museum thing and the parents had to stay.

by Platinum Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 4:37 PM
I usually spend about $15...I go to Michael's and use their 40% coupon) unless it's a good friend, then I'll spend more. At 5 I think I still stayed, DD is 8 now so I don't. Only 2 parents stayed for DD's party...the mom of her friend with Downs and a dad who is friends with us and I think had nothing else to do.
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by Gold Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 5:16 PM

We spend $15-25. Toys have become so expensive.

We drop of child off at the party and come back at the end to pick up. If there is no time specified, ask for one.

My children usually want to go to the party if they receive and invite. The only time we say no is if we have something else going on, or my child doesn't want to go, which is rare, or I feel uncomfortable either with the venue or the parental supervision.

by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 5:28 PM

I spend no more than 20 on the gift. I usually just put money cause we are unsure of what the child likes unless I know. My daughter is going to a party tomorrow and my son has one sunday. I usually let them go to every party they are invited too unless we have something else planned. I take it party by party. THe one for my daughter (shes 12). She will be left. they are going out to the movies and cicis. My son will probably be left too just depending on how comfortable i feel with the parents. if I leave them or not just depends on the parents and how i feel with it.

by Silver Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 5:57 PM

My daughter's in first grade.  I do not drop off and leave my daughter with people I don't know.  She loves to go to parties so if we're available, she goes wheher its her closest friend or one of the "I invited my whole class' types.  I spend about $20 on a present.  I usually get a card at the dollar store.

by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 6:03 PM

My dd has never gone to a party other than close friend's kids and family and I'm always there. On a classmate, I would spend between $25- $30. I wouldn't leave my 5 year old alone at a party. 

by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 6:13 PM
She goes if it's someone she likes and she wants to go and we don't have anything else planned. We usually spend around $25-$40 on a present. If we know the person really well and know that they would love a particular present, we'll get that regardless of price. Otherwise our daughter picks the present, the card and the wrapping paper or gift bag/tissue. We want her to be proud to give it. I generally stay with her, but we left her once. Parents do either at that age. In your situation, I would respect his wishes so that he can enoy himself.
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by Ruby Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 8:00 PM

 I try to keep gift cost to $15 and get a card as well.

Whether I stay or not depends on whether my child wants me to, usually. Dd went to one recently where we were told that due to space constaints, parents could not stay. Dd and I were fine w/ that. You could always ask the parents if it's ok for you to stay since your ss wants you to.






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