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Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

I'm soo frustrated with my kids

Posted by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 3:42 PM
  • 7 Replies

Hello everyone! I am new to cafe mom. My mother was a member and she said it really helped her and thought the site could help me. This is my situation, I have 3 children 13, 11 and 7. For the most part my girls which are the two older ones are pretty good just a few minor issues but my son who is 7 is giving me a run for my money. I am so tired I don't know what else to do. He is acting out in school he just got suspended yesterday for stealing off the teacher's desk even though the item he took was his. I explained to him that even though it was his when she took it and put on her desk that it was on her property and that he can't take anything off her desk without her position. He is also very angry but he won't tell me why. Whenever I ask him to do something he always gets an attitude and back talks. He has been showing me no respect lately and he just acting out maybe a year ago. Before then he was fine. I have put him into counseling through the school which didn't work but now he is at another school and I enrolled him into their counseling program where he is talking to the man but at home its a whole other story. He lies all the time, he stays into it constantly with his sisters and I just don't know what to do anymore. I am so tired. I have tried everything, talking, punishment, taking his toys and books away, whooping everything and nothing seems to be working. If anybody has any advice for me please feel free to give it whether it is positive or negative. I really appreciate it.

by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 3:42 PM
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Replies (1-7):
amonkeymom
by Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 3:57 PM

Welcome!

I honestly think you might need to get a referral from his pediatrician for a behavioral specialist to take a look at him.  They might make a diagnosis or recommend specific counseling, etc.

Otherwise, be consistant with consequences.  But, also remember to point out to him and praise him when he does good things.

Quoting punkin5681:

Hello everyone! I am new to cafe mom. My mother was a member and she said it really helped her and thought the site could help me. This is my situation, I have 3 children 13, 11 and 7. For the most part my girls which are the two older ones are pretty good just a few minor issues but my son who is 7 is giving me a run for my money. I am so tired I don't know what else to do. He is acting out in school he just got suspended yesterday for stealing off the teacher's desk even though the item he took was his. I explained to him that even though it was his when she took it and put on her desk that it was on her property and that he can't take anything off her desk without her position. He is also very angry but he won't tell me why. Whenever I ask him to do something he always gets an attitude and back talks. He has been showing me no respect lately and he just acting out maybe a year ago. Before then he was fine. I have put him into counseling through the school which didn't work but now he is at another school and I enrolled him into their counseling program where he is talking to the man but at home its a whole other story. He lies all the time, he stays into it constantly with his sisters and I just don't know what to do anymore. I am so tired. I have tried everything, talking, punishment, taking his toys and books away, whooping everything and nothing seems to be working. If anybody has any advice for me please feel free to give it whether it is positive or negative. I really appreciate it.


soymujer
by Mikki on Mar. 1, 2013 at 4:41 PM

welcomeI agree with previous poster.

family in the van   Mom of four


Pukalani79
by Silver Member on Mar. 1, 2013 at 8:21 PM

 I was going to suggest having you do family therapy.  My daughter struggles with anger issues (which turns out to be part of a bigger problem).  We did family therapy for about a year I think.  We'd go in together and talk, then sometimes I would leave and let the counselor talk with her by herself. Other times we'd do phone conferences and it would be just me and the counselor.  It really helped me to learn how to deal with it and her to find ways of expressing herself and calming herself down, as well as to understand the root of the problem.

heathercm26
by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:26 PM
My ss "stole" a spider ring from school. He didnt get it. He told me he asked if the rings were for the kids. Their were dozens of them on the sensory table. The teacher told him yes. They were for all the kids to play with at school. He put one on and proudly wore it around school. The teaxher said he lied when she asked him if it was his. He was confused and told me the teacher told him they were for the kids. He said "I'm a kid so i got one". The teacher being a vollefe educated woman experienced with dealing with kids of this age refused to accept that he may have been confused. She wrote him up. She utilized the dreaded green slip which is used for the worst offenses such as vandalism, theft, threatening other students, bringing weapons to school. Etc.
He had no idea he was stealing. He thought his teacher was being nice to share her stash of spiders. He even said that their was enough for everyone. Things like this damage teachers in general for not using common sense. After all he wasnt being malicious. Imo she should have handled this.by having him return the ring to the table and explaining that they r for everyone to play with, but only at the table. Then stating that nothing should ever be taken from he table. Instead he was sent to the principles office.
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heathercm26
by on Mar. 1, 2013 at 9:28 PM
The point being that just because the teacher says he stole doesnt mean he meant to be sneaky. Also some kids xant handle being accused of things they didnt do. Its hard for them to reconcile being patronised or belittled.
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punkin5681
by on Mar. 2, 2013 at 11:26 AM

I am going to try that because right now he just sees a counselor at school

punkin5681
by on Mar. 2, 2013 at 11:27 AM
1 mom liked this

You are right about that because he doesn't believe that stole anything and to top it off him and his teacher do not get along at all. According to other faculty members at the school, it is very hard to please her  but at the same time I'm trying to teach my kids that whether they like an adult or not they have to respect them.

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