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Kindergarten to repeat next year or not.... ****update***2

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Hi I'm new to the group.

My son is turning six next month and is currently in kindergarten. The last conference they were suggesting that he just was not where some of the other class is with reading and writing. And that repeating next year would probably be best. He is a very easy, good mannered kid. Never in trouble, plays and listens well. But I think some things just are not clicking with him, we are looking at getting him a tutor for the remainder of the school year as well as the summer if it will help him catch up. I'm just not sure if the teacher is giving up, I asked a friend that is a Kindergarten teacher in a different district and she couldn't believe the conversation came up at this time of year. 

I think it would be upsetting for him to repeat kindergarten, he is excited to be a first grader next year. But I don't want him to not be ready either. Anyone have experience with this? I need some help! 


Can't believe all of your replies still working through reading them, truly appreciate all of your advice what a great group! 

Side note, he is very good at math and unbelievable at problem solving, he also had two previous years of preschool. We thought we were doing everything we could to get him ready for this year. I think that is part of why this is so hard to grasp. Coming into school he was ahead of most kids as far as what they would like them to know. 

***update 2***

My son is currently in full day kindergarten. I will be setting him up with a tutor for the remainder of the year and over the summer. We still work with him at home but I think professional help is the best for him. He does get assistance at school during the day to work on the reading etc. and we are going to look into the possibility of dyslexia or other possible learning difficulties. This is my little man and I'm going to do everything I can for him and try to make the best decision for his next year of school. 

by on Mar. 22, 2013 at 9:47 PM
Replies (131-139):
by Bronze Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 1:39 PM

How does he do with the problems in math that require him to read a little story. And that story is the math problem?

CafeMom Tickers
by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 2:34 PM

My son had to repeat kindergarten and while I hated it at the time it was the best thing for him.

Why exactly do they want to hold him back?  My kid had behavior issues that caused him to disruptive in class.

by Silver Member on Mar. 24, 2013 at 4:40 PM
1 mom liked this


First, if it is dyslexia, it is really too early to tell at this age and it is best for him to move on as more time with teh same method will not really help.  Second, yes, our teachers start laying groundwork for retention mid year, as they want parents to be prepared and they want to try as much intervention as possible before the end of the year.  I would meet with the teacher again and ask for specific interventions she is going to try between now and the end of the year.  Also ask for specific examples of where he is and what AT STANDARD is.  So not how he compares to others in the class, but how he compares to where and end of K kid needs to be. I know last year in DD's class, 1/2 of them came in reading at end of grade standard, so to parents whose kids were not reading, lookign at their reading and writing was really scary.  But in reality, most of the kids were right where they needed to be.  She should be able to give you really concrete information like the sight words that are the minimum to be reading (I have heard schools say 300, but 50-75 is really more what end of K is), what spelling shoudl look like, and the type of book he should be able to read independently with comprehension and fluency.  Then I would (as you said) get him outside help and talk to them about a summer plan.  Kids can gain a lot over 6 months time, so it may be he has a spurt at hte end of the year and you can capitalize on that over the summer with some work.  Good luck OP!

by on Mar. 24, 2013 at 11:47 PM

I agree with you about skipping a grade even if they are academically prepared.  Emotionally, they are still with that age.  Most often when you skip they will be younger than their peers and less mature.  That is why I have chosen to allow my daughter to wait for kindergarten because she has a late birthday anyway and I think it will be better for her later.  However, in regards to children being behind and all of them catching up later, that may be the case with a few but not with the majority.  Usually if a student is far behind in kindergarten and then promoted still being behind, they end up even further behind because it is difficult for them to catch up.  I would only suggest promotion with a student who is behind if they have intense remediation.  Otherwise the gap will become larger and by 3rd grade they are lost and unmotivated.  Since we are in a school system driven by test scores it is even more imperative that a student be on grade level. 

Tonya Simmons

by on Mar. 25, 2013 at 2:50 PM

A lot can change between now and the end of the school year.  If he isn't ready for first grade, pushing him ahead will do him more harm than good.  I have 6 year old twins, and there is a very strong possibility that my girl twin will need to repeat Kindergarten but I would rather her get 2 years and extra help now than struggle all next year.  Everything comes so easy for my son and nothing ever has for my girl.  For early on she was developmentally delayed, needing help with gross motor, fine motor, sensory processing, speech, you name it.  When she finally does get something she is very proud and her brother sings her praises and makes sure I do to.

by Member on Mar. 25, 2013 at 3:42 PM

I personally struggles with reading until I was in 3rd grade. I too was advanced in math. For me my Kindergarden and First grade teachers were at least part of my problem. They made me feel self consious and unsure of myself to were I didn't want to even try. Then halfway through first grade I changed schools (we moved to a new district) and my teachers were wonderful. They took the extra time needed and didn't look down on me for having trouble. But because of how my first 2 teachers delt with my problem it took me until 3rd grade to really get into reading. Personally if this was my child I wouldn't hold them back. I think holding them back would just put more of a negative spin on this problem in thier own mind.

by on Mar. 26, 2013 at 5:21 PM
I have been able to tell for a while now which kids won't be ready for 1st grade. The end of the year is approaching quickly. If June rolls around and he is not on track then I would hold him back.
by on Mar. 27, 2013 at 3:21 PM

 my daughter had to repeat kindergarten because it was a small school and all the other kids had went to daycare and I was a sahm she was behind from day 1 and they could never catch her up..she did pretty good the 2nd other 2 sons were able to go to headstart <not sure if they even have that program anymore cause this was late 80s> but they were able to work at the same level as the other kids

by on Mar. 28, 2013 at 1:49 PM
1 mom liked this

I think tutors can be an amazing thing. My daughters school tells me she has trouble with reading but at home she does great. I personally think the standards of todays schools stresses kids out to the point where the kids give up when it gets too hard. Also, as parents we don't like to hear our kids aren't doing so well when we think they are freaking geniuses. I know it is spirit crushing for a kid when they repeat a grade, and if it's just his reading he is having trouble with I don't see why they would hold him back. If he is getting extra help in school and at home I assure you he will do better before you know it. Keeping in touch with the teacher can also help. I don't see you giving up on this and that is good. Let your son know you are there to help him too.

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