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Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

What do you call your child's teacher?

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For instance if the teacher's name is Jane Smith, do you call her Jane or Ms. Smith?

When I am speaking in a one on one situation or via email I call her Jane but if I am talking to her in front of my daughter or any other children I call her Ms. Smith. My dd tends to mimic a lot of what I do so I don't want her to stand up in class and say, "excuse me, Jane, I have a question." lol I was just wondering how other moms refer to the teacher.

by on Mar. 29, 2013 at 5:25 PM
Replies (41-50):
Ms_mom_81
by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 3:06 PM

it just depends. I know my kid's use their teachers first name.

MomVsBoys
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:17 PM

 Like you, Jane to her or to other adults, in front of sons it is always Mrs. Smith.

MsLogansMommy
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:29 PM

 I agree with most of this except the authority figure part. I agree that regardless of the teachers age they should still be respected as a professional and if one parent calls another teacher Mrs. so and so but calls her by her first name than that is showing a lack of respect. If I had other teachers I was addressing by Mr. so and so then I would address all teachers in that manner. The authority part I agree the teacher is an authority figure to my child but the teacher is not an authority figure to me.

 *I am talking about my childrens teacher this post is strictly about elementary school not a college professor that is a different type of relationship and fwiw I do refer to some of my instructors as Mr. or Mrs. but they kind of set the pace for that on the first day of clas kwim

Quoting maxswolfsuit:


Quoting SaraBethKY:

I work at a small, private school and everyone is pretty close. Most of my parents call me by my first name. I am younger than they are so I still refer to them by their last names usually. Five of them are co-workers so I always call them by their first names unless it is front of their classes. 

I think this is really important. You are younger than them, but they should view you as an authority. Do they call older teachers by their first names? 

Unless they call all the teachers by their first names I don't think your age should matter. If they do always call parents be first names I think you should do the same to them. They shouldn't be treating you differently because you're younger. You're still a professional. 

 

 

lalasmama2007
by on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:33 PM

She told us to call her by her first name.  If I speak about her to my dd, I call her Mrs. W_____.

MsLogansMommy
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:40 PM

I don't feel like it is an act of disrespect in every situation calling a teacher by their first name if any of you have read any of my other previous posts then you already know that I have the utmost respect for my dd teacher we love her and tell her every chance we get how much we appreciate her. I am older than her but that doesn't change how I feel. I think of her as a professional I respect her opinion and I generally like her as a person. My dd originally scheduled teacher for 1st grade died suddenly and the teacher dd has now only had 2 weeks to prepare that is incredibly impressive to me that she was able to turn out the type of environment and atmosphere in such a short period of time and we just cant praise her enough.

My instructors in college some are casual and laid back and they will say call me Jane, or Ms. Smith, or Ms. J or whatever you like. I usually use Mr. or Mrs. unless they say otherwise and usually given the choice I will use Mr. or Mrs. but last semester there was an English teacher and she said call her whatever and her name is Jennifer I ended up calling her Jen we all did and I have to say it didn't change a thing about how I felt towards her (and she was also younger than me) she was the best teacher I have ever had, she made me really think and step outside my comfort zone. She made me actually enjoy writing and even consider changing my major. Even though she was so casual and laid back she also commanded respect just by her presence and I do not know how to fully describe it but she is the kind of teacher that you really want to get praise from you work hard to impress her. She is what I think every teacher should be she is respectful to the class not a hard ass not a "my way or highway" teacher and she admits if she is wrong she is humorous but still doesnt take any shit. Hands down best teacher I have ever had.

maxswolfsuit
by Max on Mar. 30, 2013 at 4:55 PM

The way I look at it I wouldn't call my child's doctor by his first name. I wouldn't call a lawyer by his first name. 

I honestly don't see why a college professor is any different than an elementary school teacher. I had one professor who requested we call him by his first name. All the others were Dr. ____. I don't see why elementary school teachers wouldn't get the same courtesy. But like I said there are regional differences in how people interact with each other. 

Quoting MsLogansMommy:

 I agree with most of this except the authority figure part. I agree that regardless of the teachers age they should still be respected as a professional and if one parent calls another teacher Mrs. so and so but calls her by her first name than that is showing a lack of respect. If I had other teachers I was addressing by Mr. so and so then I would address all teachers in that manner. The authority part I agree the teacher is an authority figure to my child but the teacher is not an authority figure to me.

 *I am talking about my childrens teacher this post is strictly about elementary school not a college professor that is a different type of relationship and fwiw I do refer to some of my instructors as Mr. or Mrs. but they kind of set the pace for that on the first day of clas kwim

Quoting maxswolfsuit:


Quoting SaraBethKY:

I work at a small, private school and everyone is pretty close. Most of my parents call me by my first name. I am younger than they are so I still refer to them by their last names usually. Five of them are co-workers so I always call them by their first names unless it is front of their classes. 

I think this is really important. You are younger than them, but they should view you as an authority. Do they call older teachers by their first names? 

Unless they call all the teachers by their first names I don't think your age should matter. If they do always call parents be first names I think you should do the same to them. They shouldn't be treating you differently because you're younger. You're still a professional. 




MsLogansMommy
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 5:03 PM

 

I think you misunderstood what I meant by saying that it's a different type of relationship. The relationship between my professor and me is different than the relationship between my daughters teacher and me do you see what I mean now? My professor has (for lack of a better way to phrase it) "control" over my grade or my passing a class, whereas my dd teacher has no "control" over "me" only my child sorry if I am not describing what I mean and I hope you arent taking offense by this because that is not the way I am meaning it. I respect my childs teacher but if there is a problem or in the future with any other of my kids teacher then the teacher and I will discuss it adult to adult. If I have a problem with one of my professors I will also speak up because I am not one to keep my feelings to myself if I believe they are valid but in the end the professor has "authority" over my grade. Does that make more sense?

Quoting maxswolfsuit:

The way I look at it I wouldn't call my child's doctor by his first name. I wouldn't call a lawyer by his first name. 

I honestly don't see why a college professor is any different than an elementary school teacher. I had one professor who requested we call him by his first name. All the others were Dr. ____. I don't see why elementary school teachers wouldn't get the same courtesy. But like I said there are regional differences in how people interact with each other. 

Quoting MsLogansMommy:

 I agree with most of this except the authority figure part. I agree that regardless of the teachers age they should still be respected as a professional and if one parent calls another teacher Mrs. so and so but calls her by her first name than that is showing a lack of respect. If I had other teachers I was addressing by Mr. so and so then I would address all teachers in that manner. The authority part I agree the teacher is an authority figure to my child but the teacher is not an authority figure to me.

 *I am talking about my childrens teacher this post is strictly about elementary school not a college professor that is a different type of relationship and fwiw I do refer to some of my instructors as Mr. or Mrs. but they kind of set the pace for that on the first day of clas kwim

Quoting maxswolfsuit:


Quoting SaraBethKY:

I work at a small, private school and everyone is pretty close. Most of my parents call me by my first name. I am younger than they are so I still refer to them by their last names usually. Five of them are co-workers so I always call them by their first names unless it is front of their classes. 

I think this is really important. You are younger than them, but they should view you as an authority. Do they call older teachers by their first names? 

Unless they call all the teachers by their first names I don't think your age should matter. If they do always call parents be first names I think you should do the same to them. They shouldn't be treating you differently because you're younger. You're still a professional. 

 

 



 

maxswolfsuit
by Max on Mar. 30, 2013 at 5:10 PM

I do see what you're saying. 

I guess to me it's not really about being an authority figure to the parent. It's about being treated as a professional. Using formal names helps make the line between teacher and pal clear. When teachers and parents gets too chummy it can make things difficult. It's hard for teachers to be effective if parents feel like they have a personal relationship with them. 

Honestly, I work hard to make sure my relationships with parents are professional. Blurring that line can be really bad. 

I just ran into one of my former professors the other day. I still addressed her formally. She no longer has control over me or my grades. But that's the relationship we have so I will continue to address her that way. 

If your child's teacher told you to call her by her first name obviously she doesn't agree with me. But I will say it is a little offensive when parents assume that's OK. Like I said before would you call your doctor by his first name?

Quoting MsLogansMommy:


I think you misunderstood what I meant by saying that it's a different type of relationship. The relationship between my professor and me is different than the relationship between my daughters teacher and me do you see what I mean now? My professor has (for lack of a better way to phrase it) "control" over my grade or my passing a class, whereas my dd teacher has no "control" over "me" only my child sorry if I am not describing what I mean and I hope you arent taking offense by this because that is not the way I am meaning it. I respect my childs teacher but if there is a problem or in the future with any other of my kids teacher then the teacher and I will discuss it adult to adult. If I have a problem with one of my professors I will also speak up because I am not one to keep my feelings to myself if I believe they are valid but in the end the professor has "authority" over my grade. Does that make more sense?

Quoting maxswolfsuit:

The way I look at it I wouldn't call my child's doctor by his first name. I wouldn't call a lawyer by his first name. 

I honestly don't see why a college professor is any different than an elementary school teacher. I had one professor who requested we call him by his first name. All the others were Dr. ____. I don't see why elementary school teachers wouldn't get the same courtesy. But like I said there are regional differences in how people interact with each other. 

Quoting MsLogansMommy:

 I agree with most of this except the authority figure part. I agree that regardless of the teachers age they should still be respected as a professional and if one parent calls another teacher Mrs. so and so but calls her by her first name than that is showing a lack of respect. If I had other teachers I was addressing by Mr. so and so then I would address all teachers in that manner. The authority part I agree the teacher is an authority figure to my child but the teacher is not an authority figure to me.

 *I am talking about my childrens teacher this post is strictly about elementary school not a college professor that is a different type of relationship and fwiw I do refer to some of my instructors as Mr. or Mrs. but they kind of set the pace for that on the first day of clas kwim

Quoting maxswolfsuit:


Quoting SaraBethKY:

I work at a small, private school and everyone is pretty close. Most of my parents call me by my first name. I am younger than they are so I still refer to them by their last names usually. Five of them are co-workers so I always call them by their first names unless it is front of their classes. 

I think this is really important. You are younger than them, but they should view you as an authority. Do they call older teachers by their first names? 

Unless they call all the teachers by their first names I don't think your age should matter. If they do always call parents be first names I think you should do the same to them. They shouldn't be treating you differently because you're younger. You're still a professional. 







MsLogansMommy
by Bronze Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 7:31 PM

 

I also see where you are coming from as well, although I don't think a teacher and a doctor is a fair comparison. I agree with you if a parent and a teacher get too chummy it could make things difficult. My dd teacher and I speak regularly but it is always regarding dd or small talk before or after discussing dd. I am usually considerate of all the other factors that this teacher deals with and I see the big picture when I am making requests and such. I take into consideration the fact she has other students and I also take into consideration that my dd isn't a "precious little snowflake" I am not one of those mother's that thinks dd can do know wrong I absolutely know who my child is and I applaud this teacher for her patience and effort she makes in the current and future successes of my child.

Having said that, I am not the type of person who sees a title (i.e. Dr. or lawyer or professer etc.) and immediately assumes that person is competent because they have that title. I am a critical thinker and see everyone as human with the ability to make mistakes. I also don't feel that just because someone has a title they deserve my respect. I "treat" people with respect but that doesn't mean that I "feel" respect for them it just means that I respect myself enough to act with class. My "feelings" of respect have to be earned. When I first meet a person that is going to be a caregiver to my child in any form whether it be a teacher or a day care worker I try to start off on a good note but I'm not going to blindly give someone my trust and respect with the most important person in my life, I am going to background check and ask around and question my child everyday as to how things are going etc. I have been accused of thinking too much but I feel that is better than the opposite.  

Quoting maxswolfsuit:

I do see what you're saying. 

I guess to me it's not really about being an authority figure to the parent. It's about being treated as a professional. Using formal names helps make the line between teacher and pal clear. When teachers and parents gets too chummy it can make things difficult. It's hard for teachers to be effective if parents feel like they have a personal relationship with them. 

Honestly, I work hard to make sure my relationships with parents are professional. Blurring that line can be really bad. 

I just ran into one of my former professors the other day. I still addressed her formally. She no longer has control over me or my grades. But that's the relationship we have so I will continue to address her that way. 

If your child's teacher told you to call her by her first name obviously she doesn't agree with me. But I will say it is a little offensive when parents assume that's OK. Like I said before would you call your doctor by his first name?

Quoting MsLogansMommy:

 

I think you misunderstood what I meant by saying that it's a different type of relationship. The relationship between my professor and me is different than the relationship between my daughters teacher and me do you see what I mean now? My professor has (for lack of a better way to phrase it) "control" over my grade or my passing a class, whereas my dd teacher has no "control" over "me" only my child sorry if I am not describing what I mean and I hope you arent taking offense by this because that is not the way I am meaning it. I respect my childs teacher but if there is a problem or in the future with any other of my kids teacher then the teacher and I will discuss it adult to adult. If I have a problem with one of my professors I will also speak up because I am not one to keep my feelings to myself if I believe they are valid but in the end the professor has "authority" over my grade. Does that make more sense?

Quoting maxswolfsuit:

The way I look at it I wouldn't call my child's doctor by his first name. I wouldn't call a lawyer by his first name. 

I honestly don't see why a college professor is any different than an elementary school teacher. I had one professor who requested we call him by his first name. All the others were Dr. ____. I don't see why elementary school teachers wouldn't get the same courtesy. But like I said there are regional differences in how people interact with each other. 

Quoting MsLogansMommy:

 I agree with most of this except the authority figure part. I agree that regardless of the teachers age they should still be respected as a professional and if one parent calls another teacher Mrs. so and so but calls her by her first name than that is showing a lack of respect. If I had other teachers I was addressing by Mr. so and so then I would address all teachers in that manner. The authority part I agree the teacher is an authority figure to my child but the teacher is not an authority figure to me.

 *I am talking about my childrens teacher this post is strictly about elementary school not a college professor that is a different type of relationship and fwiw I do refer to some of my instructors as Mr. or Mrs. but they kind of set the pace for that on the first day of clas kwim

Quoting maxswolfsuit:


Quoting SaraBethKY:

I work at a small, private school and everyone is pretty close. Most of my parents call me by my first name. I am younger than they are so I still refer to them by their last names usually. Five of them are co-workers so I always call them by their first names unless it is front of their classes. 

I think this is really important. You are younger than them, but they should view you as an authority. Do they call older teachers by their first names? 

Unless they call all the teachers by their first names I don't think your age should matter. If they do always call parents be first names I think you should do the same to them. They shouldn't be treating you differently because you're younger. You're still a professional. 

 

 


 

 



 

Peachy34500
by Member on Mar. 30, 2013 at 7:32 PM
Same here


Quoting Mommynwife26:

I call them Mrs. ____.


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