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My daughter was a wonderful helpful sweet girl.  She did great through headstart,  was a "big helper" in Kindergarden....  Her behavoir took a giant nose dive this year for no apparent reason,  She started not wanting to go to school,   Telling lies, and being violent to her siblings,  She refuses to do homework no matter how I approch it.   She will tamtrum and scream about the work being "too hard"  and that we are "picking on her"   I found out just recently that she is doing this to her teacher also and has gotten three white slips in the office for definance and unrulling behavor as well as not listening and running off.  She seems to have taken a firm mind set that things will go "her way" or not happen at all.   I have exhausted the tools the school has given me to try and correct this,  I have sat and tryed to talk to her, (She slapped my face and screamed at me that "It's not HER fault,  that everyone is making fun of her")  the thing is NO ONE is making fun of her we are worried about her and want to help,  She just fights us and wont listen.  She has fallen behind in class now and isolated herself from friends with this behavor.  It breaks my heart because I truely don't know what to do.  Does anyone on here have any idea what could help or what might be going on??

UPDATE--- 2015

    I came to find out from a child in my daughters former class that the teacher was singaling my daughter out on some things.  Such as they had done a project in class and apparently my daughter had donr it in her "own" way.  The teacher had felt a need to point out what my child had done wrong.  Accourding to this other child and their mother whom had brought him to my home,  she had done this sevral times to my daughter.  =(     I removed my child from that class and finished the year with her on home school.  She seemed to calm down a lot after that.  But this year when I re enrolled her in school (Yes she made up all her work and got into the 2nd grade)  she was still very reclusive at first.  Her new teacher after talking to her about what happened she has done a great job in helping my daughter feel usful and smart and important even.  =)  I am very proud to report shes doing so much better and her temparment is improved 1000 fold.  Shes so much happier.  Thank you all for your advice and aide.    

by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 11:50 AM
Replies (51-60):
by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:06 PM

Look into Oppositional defiance disorder. You will need a therapist but it could help to know what it is.

by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:11 PM

SOMETHING is going on. 

How do you know she isn't being made fun of? Is it possible? Could she be being hurt somewhere?

by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:15 PM
2 moms liked this
Unfortunately, young children are being exposed to a lot of things we wouldn't deem appropriate and then taking it to school. Last year when my dd was in kinder, a classmate told her he was going to bring a gun to school and kill dd and our family. We're talking 5 year olds here.
Dd has picked up some backtalk and bad tones from school but we nip it in the bud fast. It's entirely possible for a child to learn behaviors from other kids at school.

Quoting mjande4:

Seriously!? Where do you live or what kind of environment do you find this normal. This is not something any kid I know would learn from another.

Quoting energygirl:

I would think she is either being bullied.....or the work is getting hard (maybe it was easier for her last year and now she is finally being challenged).  I wonder if there is the possibility of homeschooling for the rest of this year if it might help her catch up and feel less pressure.   If she "slapped your face" and never did that sort of behavior before...then she is learning it from other kids....

by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:26 PM
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Sorry if this was asked..How is she sleeping? Appetite?. Any changes other than a new grade? My first thought was sounds a little like Oppositional Defiance Disorder, or maybe hormonal imbalance but she's a little young for it to be hormones.

Quoting Mellacastray:

That is a consern.... Depression, Bi polar,  and schizafrinia all run heavy on both sides of the family.  Both her sisters my eldest and youngest have ADHD  to a point that dispite the sports, dance classes, and after school activities we have them all in they still runn circles around us like the energiser bunnies.  except my middle she gets tired and is done before Soccor is over she will come and sit with Dad or I and say shes tired and ready for bed.   Lately though she wont particapate at all says its all too hard and she dont want too.  =(  

by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:45 PM
2 moms liked this

Have some quiet, alone time with her when she's calm and ask questions, letting her feel comfortable with you, not grilled. The bathroom thing makes me suspicious. Abused children's behaviour radically changes. Absolutely get to a therapist.

by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:48 PM
That seriously sounds like she's getting bullied. Someone is really bothering her to a point were she feels like she needs to act out to get attention.
by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:52 PM
3 moms liked this
The bathroom thing screams sexual abuse to me,

Quoting Mellacastray:

She is 6 years old ,  I have had sevral PT confrences with the school about the work and home school wont help she flat refuses to do the work for me.  I try to make it as fun as possable breaking it down and doing it step by step.  But her teacher has said to me that in school on areas where "she knows the work" she is doing it wrong on purpose.  I dunno about all that because I am not there.  I had considered the whole bully thing as for a while she refused and was scared of the bath room  flatly refusing to use it and I had too walk to the school on many occations to bring her clothes because she chose to wet herself instead of go.  That stopped when they put her on the buddy program.  She never told us anything about that problem except that the bathroom was scary and she hated it.  It was chalked up to being a transional issue as the last class had a private bathroom inside of it where the teacher was near by.   I have asked her about bullies she pretty much believes anyone not doing her bidding is a bully so thats sorta a dead end.    

I will make a doctors appointment,  I can't believe I didnt think of that before.  It never occired to me it could be something they might be able to help with as it is not an illness or such,  At least I hope not.  

    In class they work in small groups so they can help one anther,  the teacher even accomidated her desire to sit with kids she claims as friends to try and help she however still proves to distract the other students and trys to get them to give her the anwsers instead of working it out for her self.  Her first really big out burst in school is when they removed her from her work group to sit at a solo station because she was behind the other kids (something she did herself by not doing the work)  they took away her fun friday so she can try to catch up on the homework she refuses to do.  =(  

by on Oct. 12, 2013 at 3:53 PM
What happened in the bathroom?
by Maria on Oct. 12, 2013 at 4:10 PM
Get her evaluated, talk with her pediatrician and seek counseling.
by Bronze Member on Oct. 12, 2013 at 4:23 PM

My first guess would be the kids she's hanging around in class.

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