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Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

Stop blaming the teacher

Posted by on Dec. 16, 2013 at 2:50 AM
  • 25 Replies
1 mom liked this

I don't understand why parents always want to blame the teacher for their child's misbehavior. I've been on both sides- teacher and mom- and I can't stand hearing parents saying that their child isn't at fault because they act up in class and that the teacher needs to pay more attention to what's going on in the class. The teacher is doing the best he/she can in a classroom of 30 (now-a-days over-crowded)! I don't think any parent could understand how difficult it can get trying to conduct classroom management unless they've been in the classroom themselves- alone! I give it up to teachers for all their hard work, patience, and dedication! It doesn't make things any better when there's that one child who chooses to not listen and acts up because he/she knows the parent will blame the teacher! Who's side are you really on?

by on Dec. 16, 2013 at 2:50 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Jinx-Troublex3
by Platinum Member on Dec. 16, 2013 at 2:54 AM
3 moms liked this
Oh for goodness sake @@ Sometimes it IS the teacher!

I am very aware of my children and their attitudes and behaviors. I will 100% admit my kids can and do cause problems.

However, once you have seen your child bullied and abused by a teacher, you know it goes both ways!
frndlyfn
by Gold Member on Dec. 16, 2013 at 2:54 AM

I am on everyone's side.  I do my best to keep the responsibility on my child since she knows the expectations of all the adults she comes into contact with.  There have been a few bad choices at school but only got a notice about one.  My dd is at the phase where if we let her, everything would be someone else's fault when it went wrong.

momtoBrenna
by Silver Member on Dec. 16, 2013 at 6:46 AM

I have been on the side of my ds being bullied by a teacher. It can be the teacher sometimes. This teacher would talk very negatively to ds and never had anything nice to say. One day, I was waiting at the doors for pickup (this was preschool we picked up and dropped off at the door but had to wait down the hall) and I looked through the glass and saw the teacher with ds. Well, she told him to go and get his coat but she was blocking most of the doorway so, in order to comply with getting his coat, he had to brush against her. She then berated him for brushing against her when he had no choice if he was going to get his coat like she told him to. 


There were other incidents but that one was the final straw and we pulled him shortly thereafter. Now, I know that he wasn't perfectly behaved but, it was his first experience with being away from home and in a school setting and he was just barely 4. He spent more time sick and in and out of the hospital than he did in class and she was always telling me, in front of the entire class, that he couldn't do x or y, etc. He could and did do all of them for me at home. 

coolmommy2x
by Gold Member on Dec. 16, 2013 at 7:26 AM
3 moms liked this
I have to say, only on CM do I see this problem. I live in a great district with amazing teachers so the level of respect is pretty high. Even when people complain, I haven't heard complaints that blame teachers for kids' behavior. Even the year I didn't like DS's teacher, I still had respect for her as a teacher (she just wasn't a good fit for DS) and I know DS wasn't the easiest student in elementary school (but he loves middle school).

Not all teachers were cut out to be teachers just as not all parents were cut out to be parents.
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mom2ljh
by on Dec. 16, 2013 at 7:28 AM
I'm glad we don't have behavior problems, and that my son is in a class of 12. I agree, it's not the teacher's fault. (S)He is doing the best they can with the situation (usually).
mjande4
by Platinum Member on Dec. 16, 2013 at 7:56 AM
2 moms liked this

I agree with everything stated here.  There are some pretty big drama queens on this site and it's no wonder their spawn have issues.  There's also a HUGE discrepency in education levels by moms on the internet, where as in my kids' school 92% of both parents are college educated.  I think this plays a huge part in how people solve problems.  As you stated, however, not everyone is cut out for everything.

Quoting coolmommy2x: I have to say, only on CM do I see this problem. I live in a great district with amazing teachers so the level of respect is pretty high. Even when people complain, I haven't heard complaints that blame teachers for kids' behavior. Even the year I didn't like DS's teacher, I still had respect for her as a teacher (she just wasn't a good fit for DS) and I know DS wasn't the easiest student in elementary school (but he loves middle school).

Not all teachers were cut out to be teachers just as not all parents were cut out to be parents.


Dodie702
by Doriane on Dec. 16, 2013 at 1:45 PM
I think that the teacher has a lot to do with the classroom management. If they have no skills,its likely that the kids will have more behavior problems. On the other hand, the parents need to be on top of the kids too. It takes everyone working together.
KairisMama
by Bronze Member on Dec. 16, 2013 at 6:32 PM
2 moms liked this

 In some cases it is the teacher, in others it is the parent. I've dealt with parents who coddle the hell out of their misbehaved kids and think they do no wrong. I've dealt with teachers who have no classroom management as well.

mommy053008
by Maria on Dec. 16, 2013 at 8:35 PM

I've seen it both ways first hand. Yes my child can be somewhat of a brat, but when she is 4 and has an accident there is NO reason to put her in time out sometimes you just don't make it to the bathroom on time she was at recess and she WAS 4! 

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Jennyanne322
by Member on Dec. 16, 2013 at 8:37 PM
It isn't always the teacher, but sometimes it is. DS teacher last year was awful, unorginized, ditzy. She had zero control over her classroom and it showed. This year his teacher is a dream.
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