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Elementary School Kids Elementary School Kids

He does what?!

Posted by on Jul. 21, 2014 at 5:17 PM
  • 17 Replies
My son is going to be 8 years old and he'll be in 2nd grade. Lately, it seems like he doesn't want to do things for himself. He wants others to do his work for him. He is in 4H, but he doesn't want to do any of the projects. He has chores to do, but he waits for someone else to do them. If you have advice, I'd love to hear it. Thank you.
by on Jul. 21, 2014 at 5:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
lanceandhailey
by Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 5:18 PM

Just make him do what he is supposed to do, parents make the rules. If he doesn't want to do the 4H projects, I'd pull him out.

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GwenMB
by Gwen on Jul. 21, 2014 at 5:21 PM

Does he want to participate in 4H? I'd be inclined to say that if he isn't doing what 4H asks that he doesn't get to participate.  My 7 yo (going into 2nd) would be dropping Cub Scouts if he wasn't willing to do the projects.  (Luckily for DH, who wants him to get his Eagle Scout because he'd be part of 5 generations of DH's family doing so, DS is willing to do the work.)

As for chores, there are consequences for not doing chores.  Toys are taken away, priviledges are removed, fun activities don't happen etc.

GwenMB
by Gwen on Jul. 21, 2014 at 5:24 PM
1 mom liked this

I heard a parenting speaker say that she told her kids that she would only prepare lunch after they were done with their chores.  She told them once or twice that first Saturday morning that she wouldn't make lunch until they were done with chores.  Kids played all morning, got hungry, she said "I prepare lunch for kids who have done their chores."  The hungry kids quick ran around doing their chores, then she made lunch for them, and the kids had learned their lesson.

Andrewsmom70
by Gold Member on Jul. 21, 2014 at 6:33 PM

Not doing chores is something he should be punished for. 

As for 4-H, if it's something he said he wants to do, he would be required to do it as well or he would be punished. And if he didn't complete it by the deadline, he would again be punished and wouldn't participate in 4-H the next go round.


soymujer
by Mikki on Jul. 21, 2014 at 8:54 PM

My 8 year old does the same thing.  We tell him to do something and he says he doesn't want to do it or that he can't.  We then tell him the consequences if he doesn't do them. 

family in the van   Mom of four


Barabell
by Barbara on Jul. 21, 2014 at 10:48 PM
1 mom liked this

Why is someone else doing HIS chores or 4H project? Shouldn't those things be left for him to do?

cpmommy
by Member on Jul. 22, 2014 at 7:21 AM
1 mom liked this

This.  My older DS (9) was in Cub Scouts, but wasn't willing to do the projects.  Turns out, he liked it just for the "social" aspects.  Which is fine, but not worth us putting out the funds if all he wants to do is play with friends.  

As for the chores....  If he sees that, if he waits long enough, someone else will do the work for him, then of course he's not going to do them!  In our house, when chores don't get done, priviledges get taken away -- no TV, video games, etc., whatever is his "thing" -- until the chores are done.

Quoting GwenMB:

Does he want to participate in 4H? I'd be inclined to say that if he isn't doing what 4H asks that he doesn't get to participate.  My 7 yo (going into 2nd) would be dropping Cub Scouts if he wasn't willing to do the projects.  (Luckily for DH, who wants him to get his Eagle Scout because he'd be part of 5 generations of DH's family doing so, DS is willing to do the work.)

As for chores, there are consequences for not doing chores.  Toys are taken away, priviledges are removed, fun activities don't happen etc.


theresaphilly
by Silver Member on Jul. 22, 2014 at 8:33 AM


Quoting lanceandhailey:

Just make him do what he is supposed to do, parents make the rules. If he doesn't want to do the 4H projects, I'd pull him out.


maxswolfsuit
by Max on Jul. 22, 2014 at 7:39 PM

I agree that if he won't do the work, he shouldn't do 4H.

 

nayeli.c
by on Jul. 22, 2014 at 8:06 PM

Punish him when he doesn't do his chores.

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