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Advice Needed: Healthy versus Lose weight

Posted by on Dec. 31, 2014 at 12:14 AM
  • 23 Replies

How can I explain to my 11 year old step daughter that i want her to change her diet to make her healthy and has nothing to do with her "being fat"?

Thanks,

Arwen

by on Dec. 31, 2014 at 12:14 AM
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Replies (1-10):
Andrewsmom70
by Gold Member on Dec. 31, 2014 at 1:22 AM
1 mom liked this
Ask her what she knows about a healthy diet, the food groups, good and bad days, etc. Correct misinformation and fill in the missing stuff. Then ask how she thinks she's doing with her food choices. Then ask where she thinks she can improve. It will help if you share how you feel you're doing, changes you'll make, etc.

Don't even mention weight loss or anything like that.
canadianmom1974
by Silver Member on Dec. 31, 2014 at 1:41 AM
2 moms liked this
I don't think you can single her out. Just make a change for the whole family without making about her. Say 'we need to be healthier as a family' if she or anyone else asks about the change.
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Marie207
by on Dec. 31, 2014 at 1:45 AM

If she is fat, you can not.  Why would she not think that is what you are talking about?  When you cook, automatically cook healthy food and have her eat, but don't talk about it.  Dont say I cooked this just for you and thing like that.  Change your cooking habit and automatically her diet will change without discussion.

ArRow13
by on Dec. 31, 2014 at 1:46 AM

I feel bad because I have to tell her to stop eating. she does it so mindlessly.

shes 11 now, and is 5'2'' and weighs 180!!!  I understand some is genetics of her mother and father (my soon to be hubby is a big guy). But i know a lot has to do with her eating habits. she sat down in her room the oher day and ate 2 sandwiches, a yougurt cup, and a WHOLE jar of pickles!!! I had to snatch a bag of chips out of her hand one day because she wasnt even paying attention to her eating and had single handedly eaten half the bag herself.

angel mini*Arwen Rose* 

ArRow13
by on Dec. 31, 2014 at 1:48 AM

any time i have used the words "we all need to change our diet and eat healthier", she asumes i am calling her fat... and come to find out its because kids at school tease her about her weight

Quoting Marie207:

If she is fat, you can not.  Why would she not think that is what you are talking about?  When you cook, automatically cook healthy food and have her eat, but don't talk about it.  Dont say I cooked this just for you and thing like that.  Change your cooking habit and automatically her diet will change without discussion.


angel mini*Arwen Rose* 

Marie207
by on Dec. 31, 2014 at 1:50 AM

I know any overweight person would feel that, that's why I said don't talk about it, just cook differently. 

Quoting ArRow13:

any time i have used the words "we all need to change our diet and eat healthier", she asumes i am calling her fat... and come to find out its because kids at school tease her about her weight

Quoting Marie207:

If she is fat, you can not.  Why would she not think that is what you are talking about?  When you cook, automatically cook healthy food and have her eat, but don't talk about it.  Dont say I cooked this just for you and thing like that.  Change your cooking habit and automatically her diet will change without discussion.

 

 

ShowMustGoOn86
by on Dec. 31, 2014 at 1:51 AM
If she is overweight, be honest and explain that she does need to lose weight to be healthy.
If she's simply eating too much junk food, explain the dangers of obesity, of vitamin deficiencies, diabetes, and how hard it is to recover from being unhealthy.
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Andrewsmom70
by Gold Member on Dec. 31, 2014 at 3:19 AM
1 mom liked this
Keep the junk out of the house and that's part of the battle.

Change rules and have food only at the dinner table with no entertainment (no TV, video games, technology, nothing else). Mindless eating happens when we are eating while doing other things.

Also, is she in any sort of counseling? Overeating is a coping mechanism.
mom22tumblebugs
by Gold Member on Dec. 31, 2014 at 8:50 AM
Start meal planning with her and teaching her how to cook.
chinosruca
by Gold Member on Dec. 31, 2014 at 9:13 AM
Don't talk about it, just do it. My 11 year old has been mindless eating and put on some weight in the last month. My grocery list eliminated the things that she was munching on mindlessly (chips, cookies, sugary yogurts). She will eat what we eat.
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