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Issue With 5y/o Teacher's Discipline

Posted by on Oct. 29, 2015 at 9:41 PM
  • 33 Replies

I was hoping to get some other mom my advice over how to handle a situation with my daughter's teacher.

At my daughter's school, the kindergarten children eat lunch very early (11 AM), but do not get home until close to 4 PM.  In an effort to make the children more comfortable and reduce acting out from hunger, the teacher allows them to bring a snack of their choosing from home to eat around 1:30.  I naturally always send my daughter a snack to school.  This morning I forgot to place her snack in her backpack ( I was out of coffee, not my best day).  So I got myself and my 3y/o dressed and ran her a snack and dropped it off at the office. 

When my daughter got off the bus this afternoon I asked her if she got her snack.  She began to cry and telling me she wasn't allowed to eat it.  According to my daughter, she and 2 other children while seated in a circle waiting to be called to get their snack were crawling over to one another and playing "tag game".   I preface this saying I understand she was not following instructions, but was doing nothing more than being a 5 y/o.  She and the 2 other children were then told because they were "showing off" they were not getting a snack.  All three were made to stand in a corner while all the other children ate their snack.  Afterward, while lining up to use the restroom, my daughter made known her intent to eat her snack upon arriving home, the aid told her no, and then had my child go to her cubby, take out her snack, and place it on the aid's desk. 

I've been fuming mad since my child got home.  I don't feel hunger is an appropriate punishment for acting as a child is wont to act.  I'm just wondering how other mom's would handle this situation as this is my first go at dealing with what I perceive as a serious issue. 

Thank you in advance. 

by on Oct. 29, 2015 at 9:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Gardeningmom4
by Bronze Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 9:45 PM
3 moms liked this

I would have a serious discussion with the principal.She had no right to take away a snack she was going to eat at home much less make them go without a snack.They could have made them eat alone or sit in time out but taking food away from them is a big hell no.

mjande4
by Platinum Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:00 PM
4 moms liked this

Your child isn't going to starve from missing one snack. If the punishment happens repeatedly, then contact the teacher. For a one time occurrence I would have a serious discussion with my child about appropriate behavior and move on.

steelcrazy
by Emerald Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:01 PM

I would have a discussion with my child about following classroom rules.  Missing one snack will not harm your child and she just may learn a lesson in the process.

2babymomma
by Bronze Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:12 PM
So she wasn't allowed to bring it home? I would be very mad about that.
momguiltrealnes
by on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:19 PM
3 moms liked this

Ok, just as a second preface, a lot child psychologists and pediatricians agree using food as punishment is unhealthy (even just a snack).  Foster families here in MD are not even supposed to withhold dessert if everyone else is eating because it is a shunning and emotionally abusive tactic.  It isn't about her being starved (though she did come home starving and wanted to eat half my kitchen), it is about a teacher and aid feeling it appropriate to use food as a form of punishment and deciding that punishment should extend home.  By all means, give a consequence, but food is not to be a part of it.   Stick her in time-out and make her eat alone or flip a card (their consequence system that deducts recess time the next day).  I did speak with her about waiting patiently and listening to instructions.  

steelcrazy
by Emerald Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:24 PM
4 moms liked this

Seriously, instead of making excuses, teach your child to follow the rules.  

lenashark
by Bronze Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:29 PM
2 moms liked this

It was a snack, not a meal, going from lunch until 4pm without eating isn't going to harm the child. She wasn't behaving so she lost the privaledge. 5 year olds knows better than that. I didn't tolerate that in my preschool class and they learned very quickly how to behave when sitting on the rug waiting to be called. If she had been listening and behaving instead of messing around, she would have been called to get her snack. I would tell my child that that is a lesson learned, want privaledges, follow the rules. 

momguiltrealnes
by on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:34 PM

It isn't about making excuses.  My child has not had ANY issues at school before this one and was even praised for being helpful on her progress report.  According to state law food is not to be used as punishment or reward in school at any time.  I'm not asking for your parenting advice, but rather opinions on how to approach the school. 

coolmommy2x
by Platinum Member on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:37 PM
1 mom liked this
Did you talk to the teacher to ger her side of the story? Kids don't always get the stories straight and there usually 3 sides to every story.
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momguiltrealnes
by on Oct. 29, 2015 at 10:42 PM

That was my intent for the morning.  I would like to speak to her and intend on going in to do so.  My child admitted to the wrong doing but did not understand being made to go hungry. 

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