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Weddings and children

Posted by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 12:41 PM
  • 26 Replies

My sister in law is getting married in June in South Carolina. The rest of the family all lives in South Dakota. My other sister in law and I are bridesmaids along with one of her friends. My husband (their brother) and I have 1 daughter age 9, my SIL that is the other bridesmaid has a 17 yr old boy and 6 yr old girl.

None of the children are a part of the wedding. The original plan was for us all to go the Wed before the wedding and return the Wed after the wedding so that we could have a couple days at the beach and take the kids to see the ocean. Now my inlaws changed it to just the Thursday before the wedding and returning the following Monday. All the events surrounding the wedding are geared towards adults (fancy dinner Thursday night to meet the groom's family), rehearsal and rehearsal dinner Friday, Saturday wedding prep and wedding at night, Sunday brunch/open gifts and BBQ in the evening. Fly out early Monday.

I said well we can at least swim at the hotel pool and go see Wonder Woman. Well there's not going to be time for that since we have to get to know the groom's family.  The girls will like going to get nails done. Oh well we'll have to see about bringing the girls.  Are there other kids to play with? Crickets.... What is there for the kids to do? Oh there's lots of toys at the house that the groom's teenage boy doesn't play with anymore.

I'm not asking her to cater to the kids but seriously they are going to BORED! And we are flying across the country.  Spending a lot of money. So something has to give! I'm temped to leave my kiddo with my sister at home so at least she'll have her cousins to play with, go swimming, etc.

UPDATE IN THE COMMENTS


by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 12:41 PM
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Replies (1-10):
anotherandree
by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 1:00 PM
4 moms liked this
I would leave them home. You're right that they will be bored and it might be nice to have some grown up time.
Ritata
by Bronze Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 1:10 PM

That's what I'm thinking. 

Quoting anotherandree: I would leave them home. You're right that they will be bored and it might be nice to have some grown up time.


KenneMaw
by Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 1:14 PM

I think your DD should stay home.    This is not a kid friendly event.  This way you and DH can have some adult time.

Ritata
by Bronze Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 1:29 PM

I might let my daughter be the one to choose.  She saw me on travel websites and asked me where we're flying.  And she got excited because she's never been on a plane before. 

Quoting KenneMaw:

I think your DD should stay home.    This is not a kid friendly event.  This way you and DH can have some adult time.


ljmom24
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 1:29 PM

So will your SIL kids be there duirng times you are trying to keep her occupied? Might be something to plan with SIL. Brides tend to be selfish and not looking at larger picture. When family has to travel, while she shouldnt have to cater to your kids, she does need to understand while she may be the center or her world, your child is you priority as is your SIL kids. Yah you could keep her home but does that put SIL in a bind. Are your kids close can they keep each other company.

Honestly I probably would put an apperance in at events but that schedule seems like overkill. Do you really have to watch her open her wedding gifts????

RaeMarie
by Bronze Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 3:10 PM
1 mom liked this

IF it weren't a family thing I would leave the kiddos home. However it is family, and even if there aren't other kids, I would catch hell for not having my kids there so auntie and uncle can see them. 

My other question is why do you have to adhere to your inlaws travel plans? Can you and your family not fly early and stay later? That is exactly what I would do and if someone didn't like it they could go scratch. 

Sydel
by Gold Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 3:10 PM

Leave them at home. Promise to do a family outing at a different time. Enjoy your adult time.

Mommy2_two
by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 3:11 PM
1 mom liked this

Why cant you and your husband stick to the original plan with your daughter (go a couple days early to go to the beach)? That way your daughter gets a fun trip too.

wife-4-life
by on Jan. 13, 2017 at 3:15 PM
We only bring kids if the invitation says Mr & Mrs and family. We brought our kids to a summer wedding it was fine because they were invited. We didn't bring them to a winter wedding because there was no mention of the family. We left them with my parents.

In your case, it may be better to leave them with your sister. Then you won't have to stress about wedding stuff AND entertaining bored kids. Weddings really aren't that fun for kids anyway.
coolmommy2x
by Platinum Member on Jan. 13, 2017 at 5:05 PM
I would do what makes sense for your family. Having brunch the next day is fine but I wouldn't stick around for the BBQ unless you can go off on your own between events and have some fun.
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