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Posted by on Sep. 16, 2007 at 7:54 PM
  • 11 Replies

Anyone have any suggestions on how to deal with coaches that side line kids (we're talking 5th grade here) who don't have the right "name"?????

How are we supposed to teach these kids to join teams, and support their friends, when grown men sideline them?????  He is at every practice, gets awesome grades and only played 5 plays in the entire game...

He asks me on the way home if he stinks at football? 

They play their own kids or friends kids on offense and defense and leave the same 4 boys standing on the sidelines

Am I over reacting or is there a problem? and if so, what do I do about it"???

any suggestions???

by on Sep. 16, 2007 at 7:54 PM
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by on Sep. 16, 2007 at 8:05 PM
At that age I think everyone should get an equal chance to play regardless of their skill level.  This is a time when they are supposed to be learning how to play the game and work as a team.  They will never so that if they aren't playing.  I would call the coach and encourage the parents of the other three to do the same.  And if nothing changes go to whoever is in charge of the League.
by on Sep. 16, 2007 at 8:17 PM
I agree, I would talk to the coach and ask the other parents to join you for support and on behalf of their children. Every child has a strength and it is up to the coach to find that strength and utilize it. My son plays soccer...his heart is totally in the game and he has fantastic effort. Although he struggles as defence....he is an excellent goalie (no ball has yet to pass him!) His coach puts him as goalie for most of the game but still has him do some defence so he can improve on it..
My point is that his coach sees his strengths & weaknesses and is utilizing one while trying to improve on the other. Every child should have equal field time & bench time! Kids don't know how to speak up for themselves at this age because we the parents have taught them to just do as their teacher or coach has told them without arguing about is up to you to advocate for him.
by on Sep. 16, 2007 at 9:45 PM
I hate to say it but at that age and if it isnt a basic learning level the coaches play by strength.

I know in soccer the coaches will play the stronger players in offense and hold the less stronger kids in defense or play them less. WIth soccer her in town they ahve intown soccer (starting in k-5th) or you try out ofr a traveling team starting in  3rd grade. By 5th grade you have been on the same team and the coach knows strengths of a child and thier weakness.

I would talk to the coach and see why he isnt playing your child more and if he explains find out how you can help to improve his skills.

It isnt fair but unfortunately it's how it is.


by on Sep. 16, 2007 at 10:03 PM
That is so sad,I would talk to the coach too.
by on Sep. 17, 2007 at 1:52 AM
Oh my gosh Deb...thought I was the only one dealing with this. My son is in 4th grade and playing his 1st year of football. This is a "pay to play" peewee leauge because our school doesn't support youth football. He gets (maybe) 10 mins of play in the game. The kids who get to play are the ones who are in the "clique". THEY ARE NINE FOR GOD SAKES!!!! I am married to one of the elementary school teacher's ex husbands which makes me the outcast (which doesn't bother me) but affects my kids unbelievably! And what do we do?????? It makes me sad that my kid practices his heart out all week then on game day stands on the sidelines!!!! Don't aren't alone on this one!
by on Sep. 17, 2007 at 10:45 AM
Does your son play for school or a league?  If it is a school, they are usually going to only play the stronger players, unless your team is up by a lot.  If not, well than I would talk with the coach and ask what you can do to help your son improve so he can have more play time.

My youngest(7) son plays football, basketball and baseball.  He loves sports, he eats breaths and sleeps sports.  He does his school work and all of his chores, otherwise he practices out in the yard all the time.  He is just naturally talented when it comes to physical sports.  He gets a lot of playing time, but he also works very hard in practices and at home with his free time.

Now my oldest son(12) plays baseball.  He enjoys it and goes to all practices and games, but he is not good.  He does not get a lot of playing time and when he does he plays left field (not much action out there).  But, he does not put in any effort with his free time, so he's not going to really improve much.  This is his choice, but we have told him if you do not dedicate yourself and work to improve you're probably not going to get as much playing time as the players who are very dedicated.  He understands this, but doesn't seem to mind. 

Football is a very difficult sport, for any age.  There are not only a lot of rules, but a lot of plays you need to learn.  Some kids get and some kids don't.  I'm not saying your child doesn't get it, but he does have to take the time to learn everything.  If everyone is not blocking who needs to be blocked then of course your QB is going to get tackled.  Or, if you're not tackling then they're QB is going to get by and they have a touchdown.

I feel for you and I wish you the best of luck.  Hopefully, talking to the coach will get you somewhere.
by on Sep. 17, 2007 at 11:20 AM
My oldest palys Pee Wee football. He gets alot of playing itme becaus ehe is a big kids o they have him in onthe Line. WE have a really big team 28kids. SO Alot of the kids on our team are sitting on the sidelines through most of the game and only get a couple mintues of play time. I know it sucks. You could talk to the coaches but If they are like our it won't help much.    


SAHM to Cooper, Alexander and Sophia

Elem Education Major hoping to graduate in 2010 with my AA!

by on Sep. 17, 2007 at 5:59 PM
He is in school league.  But the same 4 sit out each game...
by on Sep. 17, 2007 at 6:01 PM
Thanks for your replies Ladies!!!  I truly appreciate it!
by on Sep. 17, 2007 at 6:07 PM
This isn't the NFL, NHL, NBA, etc, these are kids! I hate sports for this reason! I am going to encourage my children to participate in sports, maybe try all of them, because I regret not getting into it - but it is rediculous the stuff that comes along with it. If you aren't fast enough, popular enough, good looking enough, whatever - skill doesn't matter! And then, how are you supposed to gain skill if you don't ever get to play?! I would demand that the coaches be fair! And then make sure your kid gets a strong backbone because life just sucks sometimes and you can't do anything about it!
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