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Would you attend this baby shower.

Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:24 AM by Amberwavessss
posted to The CafeMom Newcomers Club

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Question: Attend the shower or not?

Total Votes: 283

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There's a young woman in my family, I guess you'd call her my step-sister in law, who is pregnant. We're not close, never exchange gifts at birthdays or holidays, but since she's pregnant she expects gifts from everyone. She's unemployed she thinks the shower will provide her with all the diapers and supplies she'll ever need. The thing is she does drugs and smokes and drinks (yes, during pregnancy too) and is just a general low-life. MIL is all excited about the shower and the baby and is counting on me to be there. It's in December and if I don't go it could cause tension at holiday gatherings. They family all ignores her druggie ways and pretends she's an angel.

Do I stick to my ethics and not "support" this trainwreck mom-to be? Or do I put on my fakey-face and by her some pink fluff off the registry?

PS If I don't go I'd still give the BABY a gift after she's born. Probably a handmade blanket.

Written by Amberwavessss on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:24 AM Send Message

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	by Mamaz on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:27 AM i'd go for the sake of the baby. (\__/) This is bunny. Copy and paste (='.'=) bunny into your signature to (")_(") help him gain world domination
	by ninipanini on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:28 AM I'd send a gift & my regrets. ninipanini
	by quickdraw on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:28 AM I personally would not go. I don't care how my family would feel, that's just me. Don't ever lower your standards becuase of what someone might say or think. We have standards for a reason. If you feel that strongly about it then don't go. Don't support her addictions and habits, because by everyone just ignoring it, she won't stop. She needs to know that not everyone is going to bow down just becasue they don't want to make waves. Who cares. It is your life, do what you think is best not what others believe or want. JMO.
	by amber_ledford08 on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:28 AM I say stick to your guns, and I do agree with the handmade blanket. Granted I wasn't working when I had my first (19yo) but my SO did. I don't believe in druggie moms at all. It is a disgrace to people that really need help, when there are druggie moms. Anyway, handmade blanket is awesome idea.
	by mrsal on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:28 AM LOL...i dont mean to laugh,but if she thinks ONE baby shower will supply her with all of the diapers,etc that she's gonna need....she's on better drugs than i've ever heard of... 2nd,i think maybe get her something small,but dont go to the shower...the baby didnt do anything wrong,u know?? so,yeah,if you decide to get anything,do it for the baby,not her...i wouldnt want to encourage her behavior any either... Make a pregnancy ticker
	by SCmommy106 on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:28 AM Although I am in no way condoning the lifestyle she is chhosing for herself, you should go just so you don't end up looking like the bad guy. It would be awful to have everyone mad at you around the holidays.
	by ChristinaR on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:28 AM I would call and say i was sick that day.. Btw, i voted dont go....
	by altavt on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:29 AM Not the babies fault and it soiunds like she will need some help. Quoting Mamaz: i'd go for the sake of the baby.
	by rarara11 on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:30 AM Quoting Mamaz: i'd go for the sake of the baby.
	by tvlandmom59 on Nov. 22, 2008 at 8:33 AM Her family needs to do an intervention on this girl and somehow get her into rehab asap! I woudn't go to the shower. I think I'd send her information on how to get help for her drug problems.