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Is there a polite, non-confrontational way to tell my neighbor to learn some f***ing manners?

Posted by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:33 PM
  • 17 Replies

So, my kids are playing in the backyard while I get some cleaning done in the kitchen (the sliding glass door is pretty much directly in front of me and I can see them the entire time.) The gate is locked. DD(3) comes and asks if one of the neighbor girls can come back and play. I say no, because I've got some things to do. Now, my main reason for keeping the gate locked is my 6 year old DS is mentally about 2, 2 1/2 years old and if the gate isn't locked he'll walk right out and go god knows where.

It seems the neighbor kids have figured out if you push REALLY hard on the gate it'll open, even locked. DD comes in and says, "She came in anyway!", I ask how she got back there since the gate is locked, "Her mom let her in.". You have GOT to be kidding me. It seems I look away for a minute and this girls mom just pushed her way on in and invited HER kid into MY yard. Mind you, I heard DD tell the little girl she couldn't come back, and from a seperate window I could see the girls mom standing there when DD told her.

I go back there and the little girl had left. I grab the key and RElock the gate. I go in to finish my dishes and wouldn't ya know, the girls mom fucking did it AGAIN! (Pardon the language, I'm pretty livid)

I'm not confrontational. In all honesty, any kind of confrontation scares the shit out of me. So, looks like I'm going out to buy a chain to go with this lock. Should I tell my landlord? Or just get the chain and leave it at that?

by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:33 PM
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Replies (1-10):
candygirl1030
by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:39 PM

Talk to the other Mom about calling you directly to arrange for the kids to play.  Explain why there is a lock on the gate and that you would really apprecitate if the gate was not opened from the outside because of your children's safety.  Tell her that you don't mind having her child(ren) over as long as you are aware beforehand for supervision reasons and if your schedule allows.

KyliesMom5
by Platinum Member on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:41 PM

I would just get the chain.   I have one on my gate with a masters lock on it because of problems we had with the older neighborhood kids a few years ago.   I don't like confrontations myself but i think you need to have a word with this girls mom especially if she heard you and did it anyway.

Luv_my_hubby
by Nikki on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:43 PM


Quoting candygirl1030:

Talk to the other Mom about calling you directly to arrange for the kids to play.  Explain why there is a lock on the gate and that you would really apprecitate if the gate was not opened from the outside because of your children's safety.  Tell her that you don't mind having her child(ren) over as long as you are aware beforehand for supervision reasons and if your schedule allows.


I would do the same as above



Tazz2
by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:44 PM

try explaining to her that you have the lock on there for your son's safety and then if she does it again, punch her in the face. 

nemiller
by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:44 PM

i'm not really scared of confrontation, especially when i've made myself clear at least once, so i'd be on that mom's porch having a little chit-chat with her about her lack of decency.  however, since you don't want to confront her, i think locking the gate with a chain might work just as well.


 

beadingmom17
by Rachel on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:46 PM

THIS

Quoting nemiller:

i'm not really scared of confrontation, especially when i've made myself clear at least once, so i'd be on that mom's porch having a little chit-chat with her about her lack of decency.  however, since you don't want to confront her, i think locking the gate with a chain might work just as well.


yourgie
by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:48 PM

Take your kids over to her house, walk inside, tell them to play nice, yell THANKS!, and walk out. 

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inspain
by Ruby Member on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:49 PM


Chain it shut or, better yet, go over and tell her to keep her kid out of your yard unless she's asked you for permission and you've said, "yes".  The only remedy for someone with no manners or common sense is confrontation.  Believe me, if she has no sense now, you're not going to be able to instill any. 

Mrs_Ron
by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:49 PM

I would just fix the gate and leave it at that.I mean,that will pretty much say it all right?Not to mention,you could go to her and be the nicest most reasonable person in the world and her flip out.You can never be sure with people.

gabe11-14
by on Oct. 12, 2009 at 5:50 PM

I would just explain to her that there is a safty reason for the lock in the first place, and ask that in the future she please call in advance before opening it or allowing her daughter to open your gate.




*There are only so many "Good Guys" in this world, I got lucky and was blessed with 2 of the best.

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