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WHY COULDN'T HE JUST LOVE ME???!! long vent

Posted by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:23 AM
  • 12 Replies

hello everyone, i had been seeing this guy for almost a year and i just keep asking myself why couldn't he just love me? he said that he did but his actions said different, he was never around when i needed him, whenever things were bad for me he would disappear and reappear when all was well, one time my son was sick and had to be taken by ambulance to the hospital and when we were done i needed a ride home so i called him after all he was my boyfriend and his response was i just took some cold medicine and i don't drive after i take medicine which is kinda understandable but the hospital was a five minute drive from his house and i offered to drive home but he said can't you find someone else to drive you home, on another occasion i needed someone to go to store and get me some milk and diapers because my kids were sick and i didin't want to take them out in rain so i asked him to please go for me and he said no i don't feel like it, another time i told him i want to drop by your house but i can't come up because i have the kids with me the kids aren't allowed at his place and he said no i don't want to go outside today wtf? another time my toilet over flowed, i unclogged it cleaned up the mess and called him to please come over and comfort me and his response was what do you want me to do help you clean up the mess? i told him no i already did i just need a shoulder to cry on and someone to tell me its gonna be ok he said maria its gonna be ok i'm tired and  i'm going to bed, tired of what he dosen't even have a job he lives off an inheritance that his mom left him plus he only lives 5 minutes away so its not like he has to drive a long time, he has a car but he wants me to take him to apply at jobs that are far and that i said i wanted to apply at too, the point i'm trying to make his that i feel that he wants to save his gas and just use me whenever he can, we never go anywhere, no movies dinner nothing all we do is stay home and watch movies that i rent because he says he dosen't trust the redbox places but hey its ok for me to rent movies from there, he never says i love you or you look pretty he does absolutely nothing to make me feel loved but i was lonely wanted someone anyone so i took his crap but finally the whole toilet over flowing thing was the final straw for me so i ended it but damnit why couldn't he just love me?? what is wrong with me and what is wrong with him? sorry if its long and i'm rambling but i'm still hurt over this

by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:23 AM
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Replies (1-10):
LizzieAnnesMom
by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:28 AM

 IMO he doesnt give a damn about you. He is just there for the sex (if you give him any). He needs to grow up. Boot him out the door.

Proudbirthmom06
by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:29 AM

I tell you what you need to do honey-Tell him point blank "If you can't be there for me when I need you, I'm done doing things for you period" Don't take his calls, don't run his errands, don't LET him use you. You seem like a level headed person but you are letting yourself be his doormat. I understand it hurts that he doesn't feel the way you want him to feel but honey show him he can't have it like that. Show him that if he wants you, he's going to have to treat you with the respect you deserve.  Let him go and find someone who will do those things for you!

Lvlyshawn
by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:33 AM

Don't worry about him loving you...you need to love yourself enough know that you deserve to be treated so much better. Consider it a blessing that he showed you his true colors now rather than 5 years into a marriage. Kudos for you for ending it even though you might be lonely. You just made room for your prince charming to step into your life.

amylovesnick07
by Bronze Member on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:33 AM

I'm sorry your going through such a hard time right now :(  In my opinion he doesn't sound like a real man. When my husband and I were in the dating stage he would drive 3 hours one way every weekend to see me. I think you deserve way better and should boot this guy. he seems pretty worthless. Goodluck and I hope you find someone better.  (hugs)

mmtosam06
by Platinum Member on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:36 AM


Quoting Lvlyshawn:

Don't worry about him loving you...you need to love yourself enough know that you deserve to be treated so much better. Consider it a blessing that he showed you his true colors now rather than 5 years into a marriage. Kudos for you for ending it even though you might be lonely. You just made room for your prince charming to step into your life.


Photobucket stephanie/cloth diapering/full term bfing/extended harnessing mama

jojomommy
by Gold Member on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:36 AM

Good for you 

refinada_20
by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:37 AM

I totally agree with this.  Very well put!

Quoting Lvlyshawn:

Don't worry about him loving you...you need to love yourself enough know that you deserve to be treated so much better. Consider it a blessing that he showed you his true colors now rather than 5 years into a marriage. Kudos for you for ending it even though you might be lonely. You just made room for your prince charming to step into your life.


mrs.salinas.10
by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:39 AM

Hes a loser who isn't ready to grow up. You can do much better. Move on!

a_and_j_momma
by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 12:44 AM
I'm sorry you're hurting. You deserve someone who cares about you. I think you probably aren't the only one he was with based on the above. Or, you may have overwhelmed him with the kid thing. In the future try not introducing the man to your kids til you feel for sure it is a lasting thing. Don't ask a guy you're dating to buy things for your children. Good luck and I hope you find something meaningful
Sahm.I.am
by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 1:00 AM

Sweetie, you and your kids deserve better.  Trust me, I've been there and it hurts like hell but you have to know it's not your fault.  Once I realized that it wasn't going anywhere and he couldn't give me the love I needed, I dropped him and almost a year later he came back saying all the things I had wanted to hear before...problem was I had moved on.  I was still single at that time but had had an epiphany that I wouldn't settle for less!  Thank God I got him (and others since) out of my life clearing the way for my stbdh, who is everything that I wrote down and asked God for + more!!!

hugs&  feel betterfor you

Quoting Lvlyshawn:

Don't worry about him loving you...you need to love yourself enough know that you deserve to be treated so much better. Consider it a blessing that he showed you his true colors now rather than 5 years into a marriage. Kudos for you for ending it even though you might be lonely. You just made room for your prince charming to step into your life.


May the Truth spread like a pandemic @ www.youtube.com/Eyes2seeEars2hear

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