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mommys who have done Adoptions

Posted by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 11:01 PM
  • 3 Replies

we have a 14month old son and it took us 7 years of trying naturally to have him and so we are wantting to adopt a little girl we know we want to adopt from a orphanage. and we personally have no age range open to all ages any advice. ect?

by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 11:01 PM
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by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 11:09 PM

Our son was adopted via surrogate. Sorry, I don't have any info but here's a bump for ya!

by on Nov. 9, 2009 at 11:21 PM


by Gold Member on Nov. 10, 2009 at 8:28 AM

There are several different avenues for adoption. You want to adopt from an orphanage? The odds of this are slim to none domestically. Honestly, unless you are wishing to adopt a child that is truly in need your options are limited to 2 options: foster-adopt or international.

Domestic Infant: Typically done through an agency or attorney. This process is usually done by an expectant mother picking the prospective parents. It can take weeks or years for a placement. Cost is usually $10K-$25K....Every state has different laws, so it is necessary to educate yourself about the varying laws.

Foster-adopt: This is done through the county or state. Infants are available contrary to popular belief. No cost....usually a subsidy attached to the child until they are 18. Most states require you to become a licensed foster parent before adopting. You have to understand that most children in the system are not available for adoption and may never be available. TPR( termination of parental rights) must be signed before a child is legally released for adoption. This is done by the parents willingly or by the state. The foster system was designed specifically for the reunification of the family. It is not designed for adoption.

International: Done through an have to deal with several different layers of government as well. It can take months to complete your homestudy and dossier. Getting a referral can take a very short period of time depending on the chosen country program, however, it could take a year before you travel and finalize the adoption. With IA, you have to be prepared for the unexpected... the program could close at any time for restructuring or just close for good. Some countries are no longer accepting dossiers, such as Guatemala. Some countries will escort the child here to the US, and some require several weeks of travel. China requires at least 2 weeks and in some provinces they require 3 weeks. The cost is anywhere from $10K- $45K depending on the country program. Some SN children have grants attached to them. There are grants available as well as the adoption tax credit, although that is set to expire next year.

I would suggest that you do a ton of research on agencies, attachment, bonding, RAD, SPD, SID, etc... it is vital to any child that you adopt that you are fully informed before proceeding.

Adoption is not all rainbows and ponies. It is rife with grief. The first mom has to deal with the grief of relinquishing their child, the child then deals with the separation and the adoptive family then must help that child deal with their grief.

I am the adoptive mommy to a litle girl from China. We began the process in 3/05 and brought her home on 41/4/07. If you have any questions, let me know.



" I can do all things through Him who strengthens me." Phillipians 4:13

Admin- International Adoption
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