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How To Deal With The Holidays Coming Up........

Posted by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 12:45 PM
  • 10 Replies

Well Thanksgiving is almost here and then X-Mas is around the corner. :0( Im not looking forward to neither.... My brother just passed six months ago and Im taking it very hard... And now that that Holidays are coming it makes it that much worse.. We always spent the holidays at his house and this yr dont know whats going to happen..... Can any1 give me advise on what to do and how to make things feel better????

by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 12:45 PM
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Replies (1-10):
KT9105
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 12:49 PM

Try to enjoy the time with your family.  Holidays are horrid for me as well - my daughter passed 12 before Christmas in 2007.  This will be the first time we'll be back at my parents' house since it happened but I'm hoping seeing everyone again will make it easier.

rocknmom85
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 12:53 PM

 I am sorry for your lose, my father also died right before the holidays a few years ago and it did put a little damper on things. Anyway, I have since then come to enjoy the holidays again and not focus on the my sadness but instead on the happy memories. You need to make new traditions that you can carry on through the years and that are enjoyable and honor your brothers memory. It will not be easy this year but as time goes by you will be happy you didn't decide to just keep to yourself and go into depression. Good luck to you I will pray for your family this holiday season!

snowmommy0406
by Gold Member on Nov. 16, 2009 at 12:59 PM

I am sorry, we have a hard time at holidays too.  My grandma who was the glue that held our family together died 2 days after christmas (this will be 5 years and still hard) she was fine one day and in the hospital the next.  Her body finally gave out and only machines kept her alive.  This one Dr. really wanted my mom to turn off the machines on christmas because it was "cruel" as he said to keep her body alive.  Mom mom was soo distraught but my grandma's sisters and 2 of my mom's 3 brother's all flew into town (my grandma had lived with my family for the last 15 years of her life) and they made that dr. wait a few days because they were not going to let her die on christmas.  Point is that the first year is the hardest, each year you do better but will always remember your lost loved ones and christmas really brings it home.  I am wishing you and your family the best.

roses14
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 1:15 PM


Quoting KT9105:

Try to enjoy the time with your family.  Holidays are horrid for me as well - my daughter passed 12 before Christmas in 2007.  This will be the first time we'll be back at my parents' house since it happened but I'm hoping seeing everyone again will make it easier.


im sorry for ur loss as well. i hope seeing ur loved ones will make it that much easier.. and i hope as the yrs go by it gets that much easier for me and for u and ur family... thanks somuch for ur reply.. u and ur family have a save a happy holidays!!!!!!!!

roses14
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 1:26 PM


Quoting rocknmom85:

 I am sorry for your lose, my father also died right before the holidays a few years ago and it did put a little damper on things. Anyway, I have since then come to enjoy the holidays again and not focus on the my sadness but instead on the happy memories. You need to make new traditions that you can carry on through the years and that are enjoyable and honor your brothers memory. It will not be easy this year but as time goes by you will be happy you didn't decide to just keep to yourself and go into depression. Good luck to you I will pray for your family this holiday season!

im sorry for ur loss to... as for making a tradition in honor of my brother, that is really sumthing i never thought about thank u so much for that...  it really means alot to me that theirs people out there that can relate... may u and ur family have a save and happy holiday season!!!!

LuvmySFSGT
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 1:28 PM

I wish I had the answers for you...I am going to be a mess without my husband here this holiday season...

All I can give you is a virtual HUG!

mama2mycuties
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 1:32 PM

I'm sorry for your loss, I agree with the other posters, try to keep your traditions up and make new memories in honor of your brother. Maybe make some type of donation in his name, anything to honor him. Our dd died in Jan. of 2007 so holidays are tough for us also, we try to donate a toy in her name to a child who is around the same age she would have been, we also have a stocking for her and each family member writes her a message to put in it. Some friends of dh and I lost their son in a car accident last year, it will be a year on the 22nd this month and they are organizing a fundraiser to raise money for children for xmas in his name.

I'll keep your family in my thoughts! The first year is def. the hardest!

roses14
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 1:33 PM


Quoting snowmommy0406:

I am sorry, we have a hard time at holidays too.  My grandma who was the glue that held our family together died 2 days after christmas (this will be 5 years and still hard) she was fine one day and in the hospital the next.  Her body finally gave out and only machines kept her alive.  This one Dr. really wanted my mom to turn off the machines on christmas because it was "cruel" as he said to keep her body alive.  Mom mom was soo distraught but my grandma's sisters and 2 of my mom's 3 brother's all flew into town (my grandma had lived with my family for the last 15 years of her life) and they made that dr. wait a few days because they were not going to let her die on christmas.  Point is that the first year is the hardest, each year you do better but will always remember your lost loved ones and christmas really brings it home.  I am wishing you and your family the best.

soryy for ur loss... i hope it gets easier as the days and yrs go by.... ty for repling, it really helps.. u and ur family have a safe and happy holiday season!!!!

mom_love07
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 1:35 PM

i know it might be hard, esp since his house is where you spent the time. but enjoy the time you have with the family you have. i'm sure your brother wouldn't want everyone being all depressed just because he isn't around anymore.

he would want you all having a nice holiday season. just take things slowly.

my fiance, his grandmother passed away in 2008, then his grandfather just passed away this past may, i think it was. so this is the first holiday season without either of them being here. but as his mom said, his grandma wouldn't want us sitting around, being sad about her not being there. she would want us to have a good time.

     *Stefan Salvatore is my Edward Cullen.*


                     

randmmom05
by on Nov. 16, 2009 at 1:36 PM

My mother passed away 2 weeks before Christmas almost 5 years ago.  I haven't looked forward to a Christmas in years.  I told myself this year though I will not sit around moping, my mother would want me to enjoy the holidays and spoil her grand children.

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