Blended Family Holidays - How are you spending yours?
What are your plans with your blended family this Thanksgiving?
"Blended family" includes spending it with your step parents, or step siblings, or step children :)
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As a stepmom with a DH who has a contentious divorce from his ex-wife, the holidays always prove to be pretty stressful. Although I have to say that the holidays in the beginning of DH's remarriage to me were MUCH MUCH MUCH worse than they are now. The early years were very high stress, and now - ten years into it, it's just annoying.
This year my SD17 is going to be with her mother and SS12 is going to be with us. Technically it's our year to have the skids for Thanksgiving, but since we have custody of SD right now we think it's highly appropriate for her to be with her mother - her mother has had a roller-coaster battle with cancer since Thanksgiving 2007 when she was diagnosed and had a toe amputated (acral lentigious melanoma) - This is SD's last "custodial" holiday season and her mother's first Thanksgiving cancer free since her diagnosis exactly two years ago this week.
AND, frankly, SD has been kind of a pain in the arse lately with her attitude, so I am happy that she chose to be with her mom. That leaves us with SS12 - he also has a really negative attitude, but he has been living with his mom and dealing with her cancer for the last two years, so the more time he has here in a "normal" setting, the better off for him.
we were gonna have ours this sunday( tomorrow) but I changed it b/c dh is getting his son On thanksgiving, plus I have a test to study hard for. my ex, don't care, lol
xmas- we are getting ss on the eve and five days after and my ex is having his early b/c his mom is going to florida early. worked out really well this year!
We've been a blended family for many years. Our family is NOTHING at all like the typical blendeds. My ex hubby, SM, my DH and myself all get along. We don't fight. We live only a few housews away from each other. We are a rare find.
This year dad and SM are doing Thanksgiving with SM's family today because her dad is going in for surgery Wednesday. It's my weekend with the kids, but they are going to the dinner. I have no issues. Starting tomorrow it's dads week so Thanksgiving is with them. They are having a big dinner with dads family. DH and I will be attending as well.
Christmas last year we did a few days late because DH's son couldn't get here until the day after Christmas.
We never really plan anything, we just go with whatever we get. I did have my kids last year because it was our first Thanksgiving with DH's son. Ex hubby and his wife came over too.
Like I said we are not the typical blended family.
With DH's son we have the court order set in stone how the holidays go. BM is a wretched woman and doesn't care about anybody but herself. She tries to pull stupid crap wach year, but because we have learned so much from being the blended family that we are, we know how to accomidate everbody.
Thanksgiving-
- Dinner with my mom Wednesday evening
- Lunch with my dad Thursday at lunch (also lunch at maternal gma's,but not attending that one this year)
- Dinner with DH's family Thursday evening
- Friday going with my mom's family to TN for the weekend
Christmas-
- Christmas Eve is split with DH's parents and my mom's family
- Christmas Lunch with my mom
- Christmas evening with DH's family
- Day after Christmas is spent with my dad (he gets the whole day, sometimes 2 days)
This year is actually calmer. We are not going to be able to make it to 3 events (2 of them being DH's maternal gma's). I also used to go to my step-parents' families events, but it got to be too much when I got married. Everyone lives 1-2 hours away from the other. We live 5 hours away from that, so we spend as much time traveling as we do visiting :/
This was the kind of blended family *I* had growing up and this is the kind of blended family I expected to have when I married DH - I actually had NO IDEA that there were biomoms out there that wouldn't want to have at least a coordial and respectful relationship with the stepmom - It's just not how I was raised...BOY was it a shocker when BM started with her drama and malicious court filings - oh, and the kidnapping...It's all settled down now since she got cancer and has sort of had an epiphany of how much time she wasted "hating" - but she still treats us badly.
Quoting Christy644:We've been a blended family for many years. Our family is NOTHING at all like the typical blendeds. My ex hubby, SM, my DH and myself all get along. We don't fight. We live only a few housews away from each other. We are a rare find.
This year dad and SM are doing Thanksgiving with SM's family today because her dad is going in for surgery Wednesday. It's my weekend with the kids, but they are going to the dinner. I have no issues. Starting tomorrow it's dads week so Thanksgiving is with them. They are having a big dinner with dads family. DH and I will be attending as well.
Christmas last year we did a few days late because DH's son couldn't get here until the day after Christmas.
We never really plan anything, we just go with whatever we get. I did have my kids last year because it was our first Thanksgiving with DH's son. Ex hubby and his wife came over too.
Like I said we are not the typical blended family.
With DH's son we have the court order set in stone how the holidays go. BM is a wretched woman and doesn't care about anybody but herself. She tries to pull stupid crap wach year, but because we have learned so much from being the blended family that we are, we know how to accomidate everbody.
The holidays have gotten easier this year for me! lol No stepfather and stepsister to have to deal with, no husband this year and avoiding my mom's side of the family at all cost. All I have is my father's side. It sounds terrible, but if you only knew the trouble it was over the last 7 years...
Thanksgiving we are spending it at home...which we wont have anyone but me..dh..and dd. But christmas...it'll be his family and my family together...Well maybe his...My family is a HUGE blended family...My all my step brothers and sisters have different mothers...and im not related to any of them...except through marriage. lol we all head to wyoming to visit with my grandpa...for xmas I sooooo can't wait
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- texassahm
on Nov. 21, 2009 at 10:15 AM