FOSTER CARE POLL! What should I do? What would you do?
I asked this question a week ago and got many great answers. THANK YOU TOO EVERYONE WHO ANSWERED. Now, I'm hoping to get some more input from people who haven't seen the question yet. thank you.
My niece & nephew are in foster care because their parents can't care for them right now and nobody else in the family can either. They are 12 and 13 years old. I just talked to their social worker and he said they are with a "very nice" family in a "Very loving" home.
They are in Texas. I am in NC. The social worker said the family has adopted several children already, are fostering my niece & nephew plus more. I asked him exactly how many children were in the home..but he didn't know exactly..but he *thinks* 8 or 9 children. Then he said again it's a "very nice home" He even said it's not like some "horror story" you hear about on the news.
I was a BIG part of my nieces and nephew life when they were younger..but now I haven't seen them in 3 years. They have been in foster care for 2 months.
I told the social worker that I don't know what I want to do...I don't know if I want to be in their life from afar..emails/letters/phone OR if I want to fly them here to live with me.
I am a single mother, with little money, in a very small house...I can't afford them nor do I have room for them. The social worker said that if I decide to take them...the state will financially help me take care of them but it will be VERY LITTLE money because I am their blood relative ---not a foster parent. I don't even have a big enough car for them. My truck has only 2 seats. . I just don't know what to do. I hate that they are in foster care..but I dont know If I can go through with taking them. I'm only 26 and taking care of myself, my daughter, and 2 more children just seems overwhelming. WHAT WOULD YOU DO?????
ALSO LET ME ADD- since I was 12 years old..and 13...15...I always told myself that when I get older, I will adopt them. Because I saw their home life and I knew that they deserved better. Now i feel like it's my time to step in--but don't know if I can.
THANK YOU!
Quoting obrn4u:
Family is very important. I would definitely take them in.
THIS MUST BE SO HARD FOR YOU BUT IMO I THINK I WOULD TRY TO TAKE THEM IT WILL BE A LITTLE BIT HARDER AND YOU MAY STRUGGLE A LITTLE BIT MORE BUT AT THE END OF THE NIGHT YOU CAN LAY YOUR HEAD DOWN AND KNOW THAT THEIR SAFE AND SOUND AND NO ONE WILL EVER HURT THEM AGAIN. BUT GOOD LUCK IN WHAT EVER YOU DO KEEP US POSTED
Really you should ask the kids what they want. They are old enough to give their opinions. If they want to live with you then make it work, move, get another car, whatever you have to do. Where there is a will there's a way. Don't forget that you'll also qualify for assistance (like food stamps and such)
I would talk to the kids to find out if they are really happy. I have had a lot of experience with the social workers in TX and some are really great. Others not so much and it is really hard to know who is telling the truth. If the kids are happy, then yes I would leave them where they are at. If not, then I would make some effort to have them come with you. If you can't afford them, there are several options to help you.
"Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?" -Epicurus
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