Question for people who hate SAHM's that are on PA?

[Momof2Stepof3]

So if there is a SAHM who is on PA is she always lazy? Is there any reason why you think this?

Am I lazy because I am a SAHM and we're a pay check away from collecting PA? Do you know why I am a SAHM? Do you know that I have LUPUS? Do you know that I look normal from the out side but I'm always in pain and due to the fact they didn't catch my Lupus on a timely matter that Lupus has already attacked my heart, liver and kidneys. I home school my kids to fill my days so no I'm not one bit lazy. I do what I can to run my house hold. I bake 3 days a week and make every meal from scratch 7 days a week.

Yes, my husband is in the military but he is about to retire yes there are jobs out there but nothing is 100% certain. He'll get retirement which will cover our house payment. He'll get disability sense he got hurt on the job. Problem is if you have been fallowing the news military retirement and military disability is being messed with just like GM and Ford.

So unless you know for sure what a persons story is try not to judge because guess what you could be in my shoes or some one elses that is so close to needing PA.

I am thankful that my kids are almost to that age that if I had to push myself to work I could leave them home a few hours but then again what is more important my health or not ending up on PA? As I see it if my health gets any worse there is a chance my kids would be left with one parent to raise them then you'd all be up in arms because you see this healthy looking man working 3 jobs and taking care of 2 kids alone.

Jenn

[prego7386]

i think it pisses me off that sooo many military families are on assistance >:(

[Momof2Stepof3]

Yes, it is sad and you see it more lately. Up here were we are its really bad. Thankfully we have kept our heads above water. We have shut off cable. We have phone and intertnet. A for kids to go to school with and for DH when I am down he can do some work from home on his work lap top. I am thankful his command gavehim a work lap top because just in the last 2 weeks DH has been needed home a lot.

Quoting prego7386:

i think it pisses me off that sooo many military families are on assistance >:(

[twinmamaof3]

Just to let you know while I was active duty my good friend had/has lupus.  But hers was not severe?  IDK she said she got an all clear?  All I know is she can not deploy,, I ve seen the flare ups, its def not anything that is easy to deal with!  I am sorry you are going through that.  I am a sahm, to my three kids (3,2 and 2) I also go to school full time in the evenings and online we recieve wic and we are sturggling!  My husband is in the Army (sgt) Sometimes I wish I had never gotten out of the Army (I was a sgt) but it was better for me to stay home and not worry aout who was going to take care of my children  (health issues)

[AJmum]

 I will be real and tell you my issue with it. We struggled for a while, we lived paycheck to paycheck I even *gasp* collected WIC when my son was small. Of course I wanted to be home with my babies, but ya know what? I couldn't. I had to work to support our family and I did. Life is not always fair. I have no issue if you have a medical reason, or your child does ( I have a friend who's daughter has a disability and I realize how hard it is to get child care for them ) BUT I did not become a SAHM until we could afford me to be. Just like I didn't buy a new car until we could afford to. It is a luxary, not everyone can do it. I don't think anyone would accept someone on PA running out and buying a 20,000 vehicle right? So how is staying home any different? If you can't afford it you can't afford it.

[cowboygal]

Yea that sucks. We are not a military family but protecting the country is a tough job and should be better appreciated. 

Quoting prego7386:

i think it pisses me off that sooo many military families are on assistance >:(

[iheartmyshaman]

Don't waste your time justifying yourself to people you don't know.  They'll just rip you apart because they are pathetic and think it is fun.

I was on foodstamps/medicaid and I worked my ass off.  I am now on my feet again, no longer on those programs, but if you got a problem with me, get to know me and say it to my face - don't use the internet to be an asshole.  (Not OP, 'you' is used generally here.)

[tam84]

You dont owe anyone an explanation for anything and I wouldnt be giving them one.

[sent4u5041]

I will also be honest. I am a SAHM but my dh makes decent money Thank God, and I go to school. We have never had any assistance but if it came to where we would need it, you can bet my life that I would be getting a job, even if the only job I got paid me 6 bucks an hour to clean toilets at McDonalds. I see many SAHM on here who are on assistance who think it is their "right' to stay home AND collect PA while they are an able bodied American who can go to work. It is NOT your right to stay home but it IS your right to raise YOUR kids, even is it means "gasp* getting a job. I have not always been a SAHM. I worked while my Dh was deployed,,,alot of days 12 hr days to make our ends meet and make sure our dd had everything se needed and more. I quit work to go to school and just got my Associates in Oct and start back in Jan for my Bachlors. But if we couldn't afford food and shelfter I would quit school in a heartbeat to go to work. Not many SAHM would.

[Momof2Stepof3]

I am suprized she was able to stay in the military because Lupus never goes away. Flares can happen once and never happen again but it never goes away. After doing some research we are pretty sure I have had Lupus sense I was 13 years old but no one ran a certain test. I am still in a bit of shock as we just found out on Friday and I get to meet a team of doctors which will be interesting sense we don't live near a military hosiptal.

Quoting twinmamaof3:

Just to let you know while I was active duty my good friend had/has lupus.  But hers was not severe?  IDK she said she got an all clear?  All I know is she can not deploy,, I ve seen the flare ups, its def not anything that is easy to deal with!  I am sorry you are going through that.  I am a sahm, to my three kids (3,2 and 2) I also go to school full time in the evenings and online we recieve wic and we are sturggling!  My husband is in the Army (sgt) Sometimes I wish I had never gotten out of the Army (I was a sgt) but it was better for me to stay home and not worry aout who was going to take care of my children  (health issues)

[Swtmama62205]

I just got diagnosed with lupus too.  I totally understand where you are coming from