abusive relationship is finally over, but why don't i feel any better?

[wonder00woman]

I was finally able to get out of the worst relationship I've ever had in my life. But instead of feeling empowered, I'm miserable... why? can anyone help? are there any websites or places I can go to figure this out. I just want my happiness back. I want my life to feel normal again.

[KatherineM]

It will get better. Most woman feel guilty for leaving. But you must think of the positive that will come out of you leaving and the better life that you will have. It will be tough but you can get through this. And we are here if you need to talk. Hugs hun.

[MyspaceMummy]

 It's goingto take time. I was in an abusive relationship for 9 years and when I finally got out I was miserable for  months. I started going out with friends more and spending time doing things at home that I had put off forever It will get better just takes a little time.

[happytexasCM]

Change can be stressful, even positive change.

[mommyziegler]

It's going to take time. You need to be with your friends alot and your parents and just get out and do stuff and don't think about the relationship and just be happy that your out of it. I've been there in your situation. I even had my ex lay behind my car tires so i couldn't leave and then he tried to bash my car windows in. Thankfully i got away and got like 10 state troopers and got a restraining order and got away and it did take some time to heal. Deep down inside i still loved him even though he put me through so much hell and hurt me physically and emotionally. But after about 6 months i met a really good man who is now my husband and i couldn't be happier. Just keep your head up and think positive!

[wonder00woman]

Quoting MyspaceMummy:

 It's goingto take time. I was in an abusive relationship for 9 years and when I finally got out I was miserable for  months. I started going out with friends more and spending time doing things at home that I had put off forever It will get better just takes a little time.

yeah, that time thing sucks :/ we have a 1 year old together, now i'm debating on whether or not i should cut him out of his life too, i'm scared he'll become abusive towards him in the future

[wonder00woman]

Quoting mommyziegler:

It's going to take time. You need to be with your friends alot and your parents and just get out and do stuff and don't think about the relationship and just be happy that your out of it. I've been there in your situation. I even had my ex lay behind my car tires so i couldn't leave and then he tried to bash my car windows in. Thankfully i got away and got like 10 state troopers and got a restraining order and got away and it did take some time to heal. Deep down inside i still loved him even though he put me through so much hell and hurt me physically and emotionally. But after about 6 months i met a really good man who is now my husband and i couldn't be happier. Just keep your head up and think positive!

that's so strange to me how i can still love him.  i want to hate him, but i just can't. i've left before, but i always went back... and i didn't understand  why

[mommyziegler]

It's SOO hard to stop loving someone even when they've hurt you so badly.. I remember when i finally left for good all i could think about was the FEW good times and then i would stop myself and make myself think about all the HORRIBLE, ABUSIVE times and all the stress he put me through, all the money i had to waste, just all the hell to put it bluntly. It's going to be a very hard thing to get over but you will get over it. Your not going to love him forever. One of these days your going to find a man who treats you like gold and your going to stop and think back to the abusive relationship and wonder what the hell you were even doing with him. Your going to find happiness i promise.

Quoting wonder00woman:

Quoting mommyziegler:

It's going to take time. You need to be with your friends alot and your parents and just get out and do stuff and don't think about the relationship and just be happy that your out of it. I've been there in your situation. I even had my ex lay behind my car tires so i couldn't leave and then he tried to bash my car windows in. Thankfully i got away and got like 10 state troopers and got a restraining order and got away and it did take some time to heal. Deep down inside i still loved him even though he put me through so much hell and hurt me physically and emotionally. But after about 6 months i met a really good man who is now my husband and i couldn't be happier. Just keep your head up and think positive!

that's so strange to me how i can still love him.  i want to hate him, but i just can't. i've left before, but i always went back... and i didn't understand  why

[eeyoreplus4]

Your feelings are completely normal.Feel free to PM me if you want someone to talk to who has been there.

I have also sent you a PM.