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Signs of Sexual Abuse in a toddler?

Posted by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 7:20 PM
  • 3 Replies

To make a long story short.

My aunt who keeps my daughter while i work, told me to come over as soon as i got off work.

I made it there and she said have a seat, i need to tell you something, so i am like ok, well she goes ive been noticing that sarah, my dd, has been playing with her "coo coo" and i tell her to stop . She does it while in the tub. I was like, ok. I asked her has anyone touched her coo coo, and she said boys at daddy reds.  My dd calls my house daddy reds because of her dad of course and red, our dog. Anyways, so i then proceeded to ask her, Sarah who touched your coo coo? She said daddy. I then asked her if he did it like changing her diaper. She ignored me.

My heart started beating fast, lump grew in my throat. I panicked.

So i left it alone for a little while, and i asked her again. She said moe moe, which is my aunts dog, which now i dont believe that. then i asked again later, and she said her 3 yr old cousin, which they see  each other once a week and both are adult supervised, and i highly doubt that.

Sarah is two & 1/2 almost 3. She talks very well and will tell you anything you need to know.

But, i dont know if this is something my aunt wants to "stir" up. I was not "touched or molested" as a child but some of my friends were and  i will NOT have this happen.

I just need to know the signs, or something i need to look for? I am gonna set an appt with the dr tomorrow.

by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 7:20 PM
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by Ruby Member on Jan. 3, 2010 at 7:26 PM

I can't remember for sure but I think around that age is when they become aware of something down there and touch it out of curiosity.  If her father is changing her diapers, then of course he is touching her and she's telling you the truth, just not in a way that is helpful.

I know one of the signs is masterbating, like if she sitting on a chair, does she move back and forth?  

I would talk to the pediatrician.  Have you noticed any blood in her diaper/underwear?  That would also be a sign. 

by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 7:27 PM

Warning Signs in Children and Adolescents of Possible Child Sexual Abuse

Any one sign doesn't mean that a child was sexually abused, but the presence of several suggests that you begin asking questions and consider seeking help. Keep in mind that some of these signs can emerge at other times of stress such as:

  • During a divorce
  • Death of a family member or pet
  • Problems at school or with friends
  • Other anxiety-inducing or traumatic events

Behavior you may see in a child or adolescent

  • Has nightmares or other sleep problems without an explanation
  • Seems distracted or distant at odd times
  • Has a sudden change in eating habits
    • Refuses to eat
    • Loses or drastically increases appetite
    •  Has trouble swallowing.
  • Sudden mood swings: rage, fear, insecurity or withdrawal
  • Leaves "clues" that seem likely to provoke a discussion about sexual issues
  • Writes, draws, plays or dreams of sexual or frightening images
  • Develops new or unusual fear of certain people or places
  • Refuses to talk about a secret shared with an adult or older child
  • Talks about a new older friend
  • Suddenly has money, toys or other gifts without reason
  • Thinks of self or body as repulsive, dirty or bad
  • Exhibits adult-like sexual behaviors, language and knowledge

Signs more typical of younger children

  • An older child behaving like a younger child (such as bed-wetting or thumb sucking)
  • Has new words for private body parts
  • Resists removing clothes when appropriate times (bath, bed, toileting, diapering)
  • Asks other children to behave sexually or play sexual games
  • Mimics adult-like sexual behaviors with toys or stuffed animal
  • Wetting and soiling accidents unrelated to toilet training
  • Signs more typical in adolescents

  • Self-injury (cutting, burning)
  • Inadequate personal hygiene
  • Drug and alcohol abuse
  • Sexual promiscuity
  • Running away from home
  • Depression, anxiety
  • Suicide attempts
  • Fear of intimacy or closeness
  • Compulsive eating or dieting

Physical warning signs

Physical signs of sexual abuse are rare.  If you see these signs, bring your child to a doctor.   Your doctor can help you understand what may be happening and test for sexually transmitted diseases.

  • Pain, discoloration, bleeding or discharges in genitals, anus or mouth
  • Persistent or recurring pain during urination and bowel movements
  • Wetting and soiling accidents unrelated to toilet training

What You Can Do If You See Warning Signs

Remember, the most effective prevention takes place before there's a child victim to heal or an offender to punish.

by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 7:30 PM

Have her interviewed or talked with by an adult who is trained in these interviews. She is really young and it will not be easy. I would also recommend getting her in play therapy with a qualified counselor to do so. It might take some time calling around and finding someone, but if something is on-going that is the most reliable way to get answers

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