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ever just feel like a complete failure?

Posted by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:03 PM
  • 15 Replies

Because I do. I do feel like a complete and utter failure. I've had five jobs in 2009... I've either been laid off or found the job so distasteful/stressful that I quit. And now we're behind in bills, struggling financially. Our family can eat, of course, and all our utilities are on right now. I'm just stressed. I haven't finished college and can't go back because my loans are in default. I love my husband with all my heart, but because of all the stress we're both under... we fight. Not big fights, of course. Just.. little fights. But he knows me so well, that when we do have a spat, he throws out the things that he knows will hurt me the most because he's angry and doesn't think. He always says he's sorry afterwards and it's genuine. I know he's sorry. But it doesn't stop the fact that I feel like a failure and when he's angry, he tells me that everything is my fault. And it probably is. My husband is a wonderful, amazing man.. absolutely wonderful. And he's rarely angry. In fact, I think he's just.. frustrated, because I'm having such difficulty keeping a job and getting us behind in bills. He provides so well for us. He treats me like a princess. If I were him, I'd be irritated at me, too. It just hurts to hear the person I love so much echo my deepest fears. I'm so sad.. and I'm so tired of being sad.

by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:03 PM
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Replies (1-10):
hisbabybat
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:06 PM

Oh hon :( I know exaactly what you mean! But you're not a failure, everyone has their struggles and especially with how things are economically- it doesn't make you a failure, it just makes you human. And like you said, he's just stressed and men especially have a habit of running their mouths before their brain can catch up, kwim?

As you yourself said, you have a hubby who adores you and treats you like a princess, you're a great mom and your family is comfortable....that's more than a lot of people can say.

I hope things turn up for you soon :)

snoopy21276
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:09 PM

Good luck in the new year! be glad 2009 is over and look forward to the positive! Will you get a good tax return?? that is always a huge highlight in this house to help with the financial stresses! 

SpiritFortress
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:10 PM

Every fuckin day

lyranightshade
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:10 PM

Thank you. I hate to know someone else has felt like this.. but it's kind of comforting, too, you know? I know I'm blessed. Which is why I can't figure out why I'm so sad.

Quoting hisbabybat:

Oh hon :( I know exaactly what you mean! But you're not a failure, everyone has their struggles and especially with how things are economically- it doesn't make you a failure, it just makes you human. And like you said, he's just stressed and men especially have a habit of running their mouths before their brain can catch up, kwim?

As you yourself said, you have a hubby who adores you and treats you like a princess, you're a great mom and your family is comfortable....that's more than a lot of people can say.

I hope things turn up for you soon :)


savedbygrace316
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:12 PM

You are just having a hard time right now.  I don't think you can be a failure until you're dead.  There is always time to change things.  Until you can get a job I would recommend trying to take as much stress off of DH as possible.  Do special things for him and make sure he realizes how much you appreciate him and what he does.  When you find a job even if it sucks try not to leave until you have another one lined up.  Don't worry mama it will get better.

hugs

     baby 1stholiday

abmm
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:13 PM

yep, same here. I lost my job a year ago and still have not been able to find a new one.

Quoting SpiritFortress:

Every fuckin day


cherieb10
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:14 PM

hugsHugs to you mama. I hope it gets better for ya! 

lyranightshade
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:15 PM

Thanks, guys. I think I just needed to vent about this, get my feelings out somehow. I'm going to go fold laundry and drown my sorrows in the scent of downy.

pattisayshello
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:15 PM

i understand 100%. i've started this new year with so much stress i just feel like crying. whatever you do to cope, send me some advice cause i feel like i'm losing it right now. :(

lilmama22806
by on Jan. 3, 2010 at 9:15 PM

hugsEveryone feels that way sometimes, don't be so hard on yourself. I'm sure you are a wonderful mommy, wife, and person:)

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