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Does anyone's husband do this????

Posted by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:23 AM
  • 12 Replies

We are married for 9 yrs now. We hardly talk anymore unless we are screaming at each other. Here lately he is annoying the heck out of me!!! He will not help with house work!! Nothing at all. He won't take trash out or nothing. He tells me it mine turn. Who in the hell takes turns taking trash out or helping with house work?! If it needs done then freaking do it!!!!!!!!!

He says the reason why is because when he cleans then I don't pick up after myself or after the kids. I'm in school full time and work full time. I help when I can. But here is an example of what he does: I'm reading a school book and eating cereal. When I'm finish with the bowl I put it on the computer desk and continue to finish chapter. ( i have every intention of getting the bowl down to the kitchen when done with ch.) but hubby here thinks it needs to go down NOW. So he picks it up and is taking it down while bitching about it.  I just roll my eyes and shrug.

Now, I had couple of weeks off  from school so I got in a cleaning mood. CLeaned everything. Now I start back tomorrow and the house it a total mess. Toys every where, laundry every where, trash everywhere, etc etc. HE will not help since I didn't help. I'm trying to get everything done today before school starts back up.

He is acting like a child!!! Now, I'm acting like a child because of it. Oh, and who's husband say well I'm not giving you any hugs or kisses because you haven't given me any for 3 weeks now. I now have to give the first kiss or he won't kiss me?!?!? Who cares who gives the kiss first!!!!!

Am I being rude or is this normal in any relationship? My parents were never like this. IF it needed done, one of them would do it. Not saying oh it's your turn or it's a womans job. I'm just fed up with his childish behaviors!!!!!!!! And the sad thing is... I'm becoming childish. I know it's childish, but I feel like I'm hitting a wall. He told me yesterday, that he is only doing his laundry only. WTH?????

Oh, and he is right the all time. I could be having a conversation with someone and when I tell him about it he says you never said that. UH HELLO WERE YOU THERE?! NO!!! SO WHY SAY THAT TO MEE!!!!!! How can you talk to someone who is always "right"?

I'm a little ticked as you can tell. I have already told him all this but of course I'm wrong and the yelling continues. I hate fighting and we are doing it in front of the kids.

I get yelled at for ignoring him because I don't want to start anything or I get yelled at for speaking my mind. Can't win....

Sorry if I offended anyone. Never my intention.

I feel a little better...well not really. I like to punch a punching bag right now or scream!!!


by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:23 AM
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Replies (1-10):
by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:25 AM

you're not the only one going through that,  Not the only one.   

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 11:29 AM

It really sounds like the two of you need to sit down and have a really good heart to heart.  Or maybe it might be easier to write letters to each other, so there's no yelling.  I hope things get better.

by Gold Member on Jan. 18, 2010 at 12:30 PM

I think you should look into getting some marriage counseling.

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 12:48 PM

is he a sahd? bc that could be why he is acting like this

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 12:51 PM

I think counseling sounds like a good idea. You two sound like you may need someone to mediate between the both of you (not trying to sound rude. that's just how it sounds... referee anyone?? lol) i wouldn't suggest talking to him because it doesn't seem like he would listen.... and the letter writing might be a good idea. IF he agrees to do it, too. that's a rocky situation. im sorry hun.

Quoting mom2acutiepie:

I think you should look into getting some marriage counseling.

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 12:52 PM

Ha, I wish I could help, but we are going through the same things. And dh is deploying again soon, so I'm just hoping our marriage survives another deployment.

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 12:56 PM

My fiance' and I are going thru something like this too. I finally sat him down and said how things needed to change and we both need to be a team. I told hiom he needs to prove himself and that I dont want our son being in an environment like this because he could grow up to think its ok. Its been a few days and things feel a lot better between us and I'm noticing some changes.

Loving fiance of Jason <3-Proud mommy of  DoNoVaN♥ 10.16.19 @ 9:49am*4lbs 11oz*18in

by Silver Member on Jan. 18, 2010 at 12:58 PM

Join the club!

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 1:01 PM

I have been married 20 years and there has been quite a bit of stress in  marriage has endured. It sometimes gets in the way of marriage. Arguing,etc...I know. Try to hang in there...I am:-)

by on Jan. 18, 2010 at 1:10 PM

It seems like the stress level is high.  There is never enough time.  Remind him what is taking so much of your time is going to benefit your family in the end.  Sounds like you need to find each other again and remember why you are together.  Now why men act like such big babies when it comes to having to helping out I don't know.  But when it comes to housework and he says it is your turn then kindly remind him that woman have been doing all the house work since the begining of time so it is going to be his turn for a while!  Cheer up!

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