I Am Tired of Being Treated Like a Second Class Citizen
I am tired of people giving me eating tips. I am tired of people staring at me like I have three heads when I walk into a room. I am tired of all the weird questions people ask me. I am tired of people telling me what is best for me.
Why do people do this? Because I am morbidly obese. In October I weighed my heaviest at 310 pounds and I am only 5 foot 1. Some of you may think I am overreacting, but let me tell you what a normal day in the life of a morbidly obese person is like (or at least like for me).
Today I woke up and went to work. While at work I decided to rearrange my office. One of the members of my congregation (I am a minister) decided to help. While moving my desk, he kept saying "Does that give you enough room back there". There was Clearly "Enough room"! But he kept on asking. Then I sat in my new office chair and made a comment about how it did not wheel as easy as my old chair. His response, "Well I am sure the weight has something to do with it, but the extra energy it will take to wheel it, will be beneficial".
Then when i got off work I came home and DH and I (along with our two kids) went grocery shopping. I was picking through the oranges and overheard someone say "If she buys them they will probably all go bad before she eats them." I guess because I am fat that means I never eat anything healthy.
We have a strict meal plan and grocery list and buy for two weeks. By the time we are done the cart is full. Family of 4 for 2 weeks, I would be worried if it was not full. Well close to the end of the store when the cart was very full we passed an elderly couple. The man said something to his wife that was not intended for us to hear but they were old so he talked loud. He said "I wonder how many days it will take them to eat all that." Then the woman laughed and said "probably not many".
We have a rule while we are grocery shopping that everyone gets to pick one thing that they want. it can be junk or whatever, but only one thing. My 3 and a half year old wanted a doughnut. Fine. it is only one and who doesn't eat one unhealthy thing every two weeks. So we were standing at the doughnuts and a really skinny woman comes over while I am asking my daughter which doughnut she wants. This lady was getting a muffin. She proceeded to tell my daughter "You shouldn't eat that and your mom should be a better example." I was about to pipe in and tell her the muffin was probably worse than the darn doughnut, but my sweet innocent 3 year old said "my mommy is a good example. She is getting healthy for herself and for me." The woman had the nerve to say "Doesn't look like it" and gave me a full body scan.
But my daughter is right. I am getting healthy for me, and for my family. I am not doing it because of these jerks. I am doing it for me. I have lost 51 pounds since October. I am just tired of it. Truthfully it is not normally as bad as it was today, but I get crap like this all the time. Why is it so unnacceptable for me to be fat? Does it harm you in anyway? No, so why do you have to say and do such rediculous things to me and about me. I am just tired of it. I am human, treat me like one.
Ok vent done.
First of all, GOOD FOR YOU!
You've obviously seen improvement, as you mentioned you have lost weight. I can't imagine how this must make you feel, because I've never been there. I will say, though, that it simply takes trying. Sometimes it takes trying for a long time. But you keep at it, because number one, if these people really liked themselves, they wouldn't be saying this stuff to YOU, and number two, while you may not be happy with your weight right now, you are doing something about it. They cannot make a personality adjustment. Hugs Mama! I'm proud of you!
P.S. I would have TOTALLY ripped ALL those people a new one.
Hugs!
Kris in a nutshell: Love to read*TTC for six years now*Training dogs for almost 15 years*Proud stepmom*
Kudos to your daughter for sticking up for you! That there shows how awesome of a person you are!
I'm sorry people treat you so poorly. It's the old saying "Walk a mile in another's shoes"....Just remember, people who say stupid shit like that have no idea what your daily life is like.
:( im sorry people treat you like that you don't deserve it. i am also trying to lose weight good luck!
I wish you would have ran the muffin lady over with your buggy! How uncalled for and even more so that it was in front of your little girl! Bitch much? WOW! I am so sorry momma! All that matters is you are doing what YOU feel you need to do for yourself. Keep up the good work with the weight loss hun!
Let me start out by saying....What A**holes. Who do they think they are anyway? Just so you know though I am considered underweight. I eat like a freaking horse this is just how I am but I also get rude comments and looks. I once had a psych. professor in college spend the whole class standing over me, right in my face the whole time he was lecturing. The topic....Anorexia...Yea, real nice.
Im sorry other people give you such a hard time. Good job losing weight and keep at it! Your kids could be another big motivator for you... if you dont show them the right way to eat, they could have health problems later on and as a mom I know you dont want that... that's how I do my diet/lifestyle change. I know my son will pick up on good habits. So kudos to you for being proactive!
I'm a vaxing, circing, disposable diaper using, bf switched to ff, CIO sometimes, pushed 1hr before a c-section (and don't regret it), college graduate, loving my son, can't wait to have another baby, trust your own judgement, kind of mom.
I know what you are going through. As So am I. I have ppl constantly telling me I am going to make my kids fat because I let them have tv dinners. I have 3 girls under 3 sometimes, that is all I have energy for. But it isn't 3 times a day so its okay. they eat lots of fruit. anyway I'm sorry that that happens to you. I only gained 25 lbs this time around with my pregnancy adn I lost it all...3 weeks later I gained it all back and I am breastfeeding...wth? I am frusterated but I have to try harder thats all. You should be and most likely are proud of your daughter. I'm sure you are a great mother as you can see it in your daughter. Good job mommy!
You seem like such a sweet lady! So let me be a b***h for you! F those people! I'd tell them right where to stick it! ugh i dislike people like that who think they have the right to talk about someone else because their looks are different! Hugs to you mama! Congrats on the weight loss!!!
Ashley's Husband Made it Home From a Deployment in Iraq - And Then Tragedy Struck
- mandy716
on Feb. 9, 2010 at 1:26 AM