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Calling hours etiquette

Posted by on Feb. 16, 2010 at 8:02 AM
  • 4 Replies

Here's the story...

I used to work with a guy that I'll call John.  We were friends, he was friends with my husband when my husband still worked for this company, he helped us moved and was at our wedding.  John had a son I'll call Jimmy.  In January, John lost his job and then 2 weeks later, his wife left him.  Friday night, John shot and killed 7 year old Jimmy, and then turned the gun on himself.  Now, Jimmy's uncle (his mom's brother) also works here.  He and I are pretty good friends.  I've also met Jimmy's mom on a couple of occasions. 

Now for my questions...to whom do I address the sympathy card to?  Jimmy's uncle or mom?  Do I bring 2 cards with me, one for each?  Also, what exactly happens at calling hours?  What should I do or say?  I've never really been to any calling hours.  I will be going alone as my husband does not think he would be able to handle it.  I should mention that I did also know the child from a few company functions.

Thanks in advance for any answers!

by on Feb. 16, 2010 at 8:02 AM
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Replies (1-4):
raegansmom
by Cyndi on Feb. 16, 2010 at 8:07 AM

I would bring cards for both.  As for what to say, just keep it simple, "I am very sorry for your loss."

FDNYwife
by on Feb. 16, 2010 at 8:11 AM

I would bring 2 cards.  That would be the nicest thing.

If by calling hours, you mean the wake, Id say just say I am so very sorry. 

Sorry to hear the news.

mousesmommy81
by on Feb. 16, 2010 at 8:13 AM


Quoting raegansmom:

I would bring cards for both.  As for what to say, just keep it simple, "I am very sorry for your loss."


Agree!

wife.and.mommy
by on Feb. 16, 2010 at 8:13 AM

i would bring two cards, and at the wake just say i am very sorry for you loss

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