HE HIT ME FOR CHEWING!!! EDITED AND UPDATED

[dumdscreenname]

 

 ok so my husband got home frm work the house was clean as usual, and the laundry basket was empty. he says hi talks to me for like five mins. and then goes to take a nap. i am currently not working because i'm 7 months pregnant and have had no contact with the outside world for over 8 hours today, just me and my one year old daughter, all alone all day. he wakes up about 7:30pm and i'm sitting on the couch crossstiching, he watches tv for a while asks me what i want for dinner and then goes to make it. i'm still crossstiching, he's cooking were kinda talking nothing serious just chatter, he makes asparagus,  fried chicken and mashed potatoes, brings it to the table and i bite in to an asparagus spear, he turns and tells me very rudly to "stop that crap" i'm like what? "chewing quit chewing like that!"  he turns back to look at the tv i continue eating, then he starts making very loud exagerated chewing sounds i'm like "what the hell are you doing?" he yells " thats the way you chew" then i push my plate away crying. he tells my daughter "oh now your mommy's crying big baby" then asks me if i'm going to eat and picks up the food to throw it in the trash. i stop him he brings it back, continues to berate me about the way i chew, i am crying my daughter is staring at us so i get up to leave and he still won't stop at this point i'm crying and telling him " shut up, just shut up, you stupid ass, you are yelling at me for chewing f*&%ing chewing!!" he gets up hits me and then grabs my shirt like he's tryin to choke me, i get away and am now in the bedroom he's out there playing with my daughter like nothing happened. this is the way it is with him we only fight like 2 or 3 times a year we've been together for 5, but the bad fights they come out of nowhere and he's violent. the last time we fought i was ready to leave his dumb ass then i found out i was pregnant. so i've wanted to leave him for a while even before that but now i just don't know what to do. i have one child (almost two) and i'm 7 months pregnant, my family lives hours away, i have no money, no job and no place to go. how do i raise 2 children on my own? i don't want to be with this ass but what the hell am i suppposed to do now?  what do i do? i'm tired of this crap, it keeps getting worse everytime it happens. what do i do?

by the way i chew with my mouth closed and no one else has ever said anything about my chewing.

 

 

ok so just so you all know i am ok! thanks for all the responses and support!

but let me explain why i stay and what makes it so hard to leave..

i grew up in a very abusive household it was daily crap getting told how fat and ugly and dumb i am how i'd never achive anything. watching my mom get beat daily. we were homesvhooled because my dad didn't want us going to school, we were not allowed to check the mail, or talk on the phone, or check the mail, or listen to music until my dad approved it, or watch tv, my dad did not allow us to see my mother's mom our grandma, kept us apart from all our family. so we had no one.

for the longest time i thought it was ok, normal, then as i got older and got a job and got out of the house i relized it wasn't. i spent nights dreming about how i'd kill my father and free my mom and sisters from him. but i never did.

at 18 i met a guy 32 years old i know, i know, but he was so nice and so diffrent, then one day my dad was going to punish me for talking back so he told me to go get the extension cord ( so he could beat me with it) i packed a bag instead and escaped after he beat me and i swear almost killed me i was so scared i peed on my self while he was beating me. that was the last time. i left and after my grandma died and my boyfriend the 32 year old broke up with me i was alone and homeless sleeping under bridges.

i met another guy he was also nice helped me get staered in school, helped me get an apartment, and then broke up with me, so i met another guy ( my husband)  super sweet, dated him all through school never said one negative thing to me, never hit me, moved in and sometime after the arguments started still not violent just loud. then he hit me one day i was going to leave him making plans, when i found out i was pregnant, lol i now have an associates degree and a baby haha, so i stayed and he reamined his sweet nice self except now the  yelling became violent, he started hitting me and i sure as hell hit back, that m**(&^&*%F(&*(^(ER got as good as he gave, then next day he'd bring flowers and apologies and everything will be ok. i guareentee you after last night it will be at least another 4 or5 months until we fight again. he'll probably bring flowers today.

so thats the whole pathetic story, 2 or 3 times a year out of nowhere, my husband is a monster.  but thats all its nowhere near what was going on at my dads, i do what i want when i want, i go where i please. 

except now i don't want to be here i have no one to give me anything, no freinds, no family (thats worth anything to me) no money, no job, nothing so i endure, i put up with this crap because it's not as bad, not as mean not as scary, i don't want  to take my daughter and end up under a bridge again, i can't do that.  i know i have to leave i don't want my daughter growing up watching this crap, i don't want her becoming me, i just am stuck, and scared and don't know what to do.

 

to alll those who wanted a response from me he came in the room and i had to get off the computer. none of this is fake. i wasn't making fun of anyone, sorry i couldn't respond.

[BlessedToBMommy]

lady you need to leave him if you cant do that you cant do what you should do for your children

[BlessedToBMommy]

Then you find a shelter in no time he'll hit your kids too

[lifehappy]

Abuse is abuse is abuse, whether it's 2-3 times a year or every day. I feel for you, Mama, but you are scapegoating. If you stay and your DD is raised in that environment, you're only allowing the cycle to continue. You can leave and make a better life for yourself and your child...it will be hard, but don't you think she's worth it?

[BlessedToBMommy]

omg you went through it as a kid? your doing the same to your dd, and she will have a man beat her if you dont leave now.

[CeeLee85]

I'm glad you are back on I was wondering about you.  You have to break the cycle though, if you don't your daughter is going to grow up to be you:( go to a womans shelter.  Just leave him:( Good luck

[carterscutie85]

 

"for the longest time i thought it was ok, normal, then as i got older and got a job and got out of the house i relized it wasn't. i spent nights dreming about how i'd kill my father and free my mom and sisters from him. but i never did."

Your daughter is going to think and feel the same way. Your hubs needs some serious counseling or u need to leave. Violence especially against a pregnant woman is never OK nor justified. If u keep letting it happen it will only get worse.

[mommywife06]

 You leave. You know its wrong. You cant change him, we cant give you the advice to change him. The only advice we can give is either leave him or stay. So theres your 2 options. Im not trying to be bitchy about it but seriously you know its wrong and you know its not right and your still there?

[crwspringer]

he is bipolar and needs help.  You need to leave.

[gulfcoastmom4]

You leave thats what you do, wuit making excuses and just go.

[mikiemom]

Find a woman's shelter. you have internet google it if you have to.