MOMMA OF FOUR

[luvintaters]

Hello everyone, i'm a momma of four, 3 boys and a girl, ages 10 months, 7,9, and 10 years old. I'm 28 years old from st charles, mo. I'm smilin everyday no matter how crazy it gets around here, i'm looking for good ole advice, and maybe make a few friends along the way!

[theRonimal]

This was posted in here earlier:

 

 

How to spot a mother of four
1) She sometimes neglects to wipe the snot off of her kids' noses. What? It's just coming back. That crusty stuff serves as a barrier diversion for further leakage.

2) She fills up her baby's bottle at a public water fountain. Sterilization is overrated. I mean that.

3) She sits on her butt at preschool, watching, as her two-year-old pulls a small basketball hoop over on himself. He's learning about gravity. It's like a science experiment. When the horrified mom closest to him apologizes for not stopping the crash, she shocks her further by saying, without thinking, "not your fault, I watched it happen, I should have gotten off my butt sooner."

4) After being up from 1:00 a.m. until 6:00 a.m. Saturday morning with a feverish two-year-old screaming about pain in his ear, she feeds everyone, puts them in front of a movie and showers before heading to urgent care. Because she's dirty. And ear infections do not constitute a crisis. In fact, anything less than broken bones, copious bleeding or difficulty breathing does not constitute a crisis. She also takes all four of her children to urgent care with her, despite kind offers by friends to keep a few (making her FANTASTICALLY easy to spot at urgent care). WTH, urgent care is the ninth level of hell anyway, what's a few more whiny children.

5) She catches her four-year-old son licking every single piece of mushroom he just sliced for dinner and throws them in the pot anyway because Oh My Holy Hell she is not going back to the store with all four children.

6) If you see her at Starbucks with only her nine-month-old son, you can identify her because hers is the only baby sitting on the floor gnawing on someone else's discarded Starbucks cup.

7) She lets her ear-infected, horrifically snotty two-year-old help put the cheese on the top of the pasta bake. I mean, really, his brother already licked every mushroom and the whole family is exposed to his snot smears all over the house anyway.

8) Her nine-month-old's first solid foods were chocolate chip mint ice cream, rice cereal, bananas, with a spoon from the banana, frosting, frozen blueberries and refried beans. In that order. Her first three children had only one of those things before their first birthdays.

9) She lets aforementioned disgustingly snotty two-year-old play with every single piece of Tupperware in the Tupperware cupboard because how else is she ever going to manage to throw together even the easiest of dinners? And then, after dinner, she puts the leftovers into one of said Tupperware containers without washing it. What's the point? See above re: licking of mushrooms and snotting on cheese.

10) She does not invite people over for dinner. For obvious reasons.

11) If you spied her through her broad front windows having dinner with her children in her dining room on Easter, the seventh day in a row that her husband worked a ten hour shift, you might see a glass of wine at her place. Can you blame her?

12) If you happen to run into her on a rare and much coveted outing on her own, you will know her by the spring in her step, the frantic way she stops every few minutes as if she's forgotten something and then remembers and continues on, and the slightly crusty something, we are hoping not snot, on the shoulder of her shirt. Or in her hair.

13) She might, occasionally, let the new puppy sleep on the baby. Because he's so quiet when he's sleeping. Not anymore. At eleven weeks, the new puppy officially weighs more than Nate.


14) She's deep down, peace in her soul happy. She laughs a lot. She's too busy to sweat the small stuff. Most days. Unless the small stuff is whining and then she sweats them quite a bit. (Couldn't resist, fourteen is my favorite number.)

Maybe I should have titled this, "confessions of a mother of four." Anyone have a good one? It's quite liberating.


OK -- my favorite reply:

I'd add:

She picks up the grapes (apple slice, hot dog, whatever) from the floor and puts it back on the paper plate to be served for her child's lunch. That is, if the baby hasn't gotten to it first. 

Or:

When the baby has dumped out an entire box of cereal onto the floor, she lets the kids eat what they can before sweeping up the rest.

And:

She may or may not have scooped up some of the dumped out cereal with her hands and put in back in the cereal box and returned it to the cabinet.

It is possible for a child to survive on nothing but: Hot dogs, chicken nuggets, kool-aid, and cheerieos.