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I dont understand why some see this as a sign of abuse...

Posted by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:17 PM
  • 24 Replies

 I've seen so many times that a mother will say that she thinks her child is being abused by her ex, or that it's a sign of abuse when mother and father exchange a child (whenever the mother gives the child to her father for visitation). My husband loves our children and does NOT abuse them but sometimes my kids freak out if I leave them to go to the car, so I imagine if we were to split up and I had to give my children to their father for visitation that they would freak out also. Not because their father abuses them but because they are seperating from the mother.

Am I the only one who feels this way? I mean I just do get why a mother things her kids are being abused and a "sign" of this is when the kid doesn't want to leave the mother? IDK what do you all think?


by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:17 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Susan0805
by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:21 PM

 bump

Susan0805
by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:24 PM

 noone has an opinion on this?

maynaysmom
by Silver Member on May. 2, 2010 at 7:25 PM

 I can definitely see what you are saying but on the other hand it can be a clue to abuse as well.  When something is going on I am sure there are other signs as well.

Mamie_85
by Ruby Member on May. 2, 2010 at 7:26 PM

i would never see that as a sign of abuse. but then my 3 and 4 year old run to their dad's car happily too so idk.

Mamie_85
by Ruby Member on May. 2, 2010 at 7:26 PM


Quoting MysticalRaven:

its abuse..and its wrong!


go away troll.

unclemomma
by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:27 PM

yeah but there is a difference in the cries that are given when they are scared and when they just want you

candy79556
by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:27 PM

my son used to really freak out when I left him at school I guess that I could have just assumed that his teacher was abusing him but instead I just assumed that most kids do freak out when their parent leaves them.   I agree with you this doesn't always mean that the other parent is doing something to them but it could just as well mean that they are. I would have to see other signs of abuse.

smurfbitebug
by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:27 PM

 yes, it can be a "sign" yet there would have to be other signs as well for it to add up to anything at all. like you said, some children are just attached to their mother more than their father.

caljones
by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:27 PM

it depends on how the kids are with others. if they will leave the mother rather happily then comes time to go see dad, they freak. that's what the sign is. if it's just leaving mom, then separation anxiaty. once my son started school, the only time he gets upset when i'm gone is when he's just waking up from a nap.

BlessedToBMommy
by on May. 2, 2010 at 7:27 PM

well when a normally happy vchild begins to scream in fear whjen being transfered to someone, its irresponsible not to check it out.

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