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I had decided to do this, and now I don't know. Opinions please!

Posted by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:11 PM
  • 24 Replies

 

Poll

Question: Invite them?

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Yes

No

Other


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Total Votes: 37

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 My ILs suck.  Every year the kids birthdays are all about their drama and this year is no different.  MIL is fighting with StepMIL's son and his wife (long story) and one will not come if the other comes.  FIL and StepMIL didn't show up to DD's 1st birthday last year b/c "DH didn't acknowledge me on father's day or my birthday."  Yeah b/c DD's birthday is all about you, right?  UGH jerk.  I could go on and on.  So even though we are currently "talking" to them (his family fights and cuts eachother off on a regular basis) DH and I talked and decided not to invite any of them.  We are taking DD to a bounce and play place and DS to a arcade the Saturdays before their birthdays and then doing a dinner with my family on Sunday with cake and presents and all.  My kids are 4 and 2 so not old enough to have a whole lot of school friends yet.  My ILs have nothing to do with my kids what so ever and they haven't called or seen them since Christmas.  So what do you think?  Is this b*tchy?  I had decided, and now I am kind of going back on it. 

 

by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:11 PM
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Replies (1-10):
MommytoNandA
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:16 PM

BUMP!

iainsmommy
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:18 PM

Nope with attitudes like that I wouldn't invite them either!

DigiScrapperMom
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:19 PM

I wouldn't want to invite them either.

MommytoNandA
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:21 PM

 Thanks ladies now I don't feel like such a b*tch!   DH is fine with it, I just have a really close family and it is hard for me to just cut people off, KWIM?  That's how his family is, they can't talk w/o fighting.

threeeunder3
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:21 PM

I said yes, invite them, because that way neither can start shit that you didn't invite them, and if they don't come then oh well! they can decide for themselves whether or not they want to come, and sounds like neither will come.

MommytoNandA
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:25 PM

 This was my point in inviting them, DH says he will deal with it if they do start crap, but I know I will be the one they go after, so IDK.  I think there will be drama no matter what I do.

Quoting threeeunder3:

I said yes, invite them, because that way neither can start shit that you didn't invite them, and if they don't come then oh well! they can decide for themselves whether or not they want to come, and sounds like neither will come.

 

alexa_n_mommy
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:25 PM

My DDs dad didn't even call her on her birthday so I know what it's like.

iamcafemom83
by Rah-Rah on May. 26, 2010 at 4:25 PM

 it is bitchy!! i would still extend the invite. its their decision if they are going to let other family members ruin their time w/ the grandkids.

i am going through something similiar w/ my mom & her sisters. family gatherings have been tense when they all show up, that is IF they show up!

i just think it would cause more trouble for you if they were to find out. you don't want more drama, do you?? lol

Newtons06
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:28 PM

My DS first birthday we weren't speaking to my ILs and so we did not invite them to his birthday party and now 2 years later I feel really bad about it.  My MIL and I get along very well now and she's like my second mother so I still feel bad about it.  But that doesn't mean we don't have our issues, she and my FIL fight constantly and then blame my hubby for it, she loves drama and is a pathological liar about EVERYTHING.  So believe me, I know how the drama is. 

If it were me, I would remind them that her birthday is coming up and just ask them if they'd like to go out to eat or have a smallish party with just them or something like that, that way everyone is seperate.

Mommy2One881
by on May. 26, 2010 at 4:28 PM

If there will be drama anyways leave them out of you kids special day. People who always need all the attention on them are quite draining. At least you will be able to enjoy the kids parties, without their drama, even though you will have to deal with it later anyways.

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