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please...tell me what would you have done? tough situation

Posted by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 9:58 AM
  • 73 Replies

I had my cousins 17 yr old  step sister,  watching our children. I asked her to go away with my husband and i for the weekend to baby sit our kids so we could enjoy ourselves. She agreed to do so and we were going to be paying her 100 dollars. We had a convention to go to so she was going to stay at the hotel with the kids and take them swimming and stuff one night, and the next night watch them at the hotel while we went to dinner. One of the days while we were having a picnic they kept throwing food at each other and laughing and having fun, ye they weren't including me in the "food fight" or making me any party of the laughter. It annoyed me but whatever she can tend to be childish and annoying anyway. Back at the hotel i was talking a shower and when i opened the BR door and in the mirror i saw that my husband was on the floor kneeling over her like they had been kissing. she is 17 my so was29 in-case you are wondering. I asked him to come in the BR and i told him what i saw in the mirror reflection. he said he was looking for something on the floor and that nothing was going on.bullshit.I was about to flip at them and make the girl find her own way home, but instead i decided to wait til we got home to deal with this. I talked to him about it a lot and he kept denying anything was going on. a few days later i was out with friends and i got a text from my husband and it said " how far would you let me go?" i knew instantly that this was not for me. i went home and he lied sating he meant how far would i let him push the baby in is stroller where it was dark out. liar i am not stupid!! I told him i was not dealing with this shit and he better tell me what was going on or i would call the girl myself. i did  just that and i found out everything. that she had a crush on him for a while and that she had never had a boyfriend or don't anything sexual with a boy so cause no one wanted her in her school.she said she had a crush on him and when he was the only 1 who had ever paid attn to her she liked him more. i found out she has been at my house 3 or 4 times when i wasn't home and that they had kissed more than once. Noting went father and i know this for sure, however even after a yr of them not talking and a year of my husband being in counseling, it is still hard to trust him. He has given me no reason not to trust him now for almost a yr, and things are gong great. but sometimes i worry that it will happen again and he will be unfaithful.would any of you have stayed??

by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 9:58 AM
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Replies (1-10):
marvelousmandy
by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:02 AM

bump

sunfreezeinmi
by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:05 AM

BUMP!

klespeedy0205
by Silver Member on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:05 AM

 I would have had a fit and threw them both out.  Then he would have had to go.  I dont think I could get over cheating.  Matter a fact I know I couldnt.  I dealt with that with an ex and that is why we are no longer together.  On a good side I did end up with a good man.

crazymama2kids
by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:06 AM
wow sorry you are going through that :(
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emt088
by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:07 AM

sorry- i know it always easierto say what you would do when youre not in a situation, but NO- i would NOT have stayed in that case.

CMatyk
by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:07 AM

He was cheating on you.. with a minor.. And yes, kissing to me is just as bad as going all the way!! Sick..

marvelousmandy
by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:08 AM


Quoting CMatyk:

He was cheating on you.. with a minor.. And yes, kissing to me is just as bad as going all the way!! Sick..


That is how i felt too, unfortunately although she was technically a minor 16 is the legal age and she was 17 so it was legal.

MLozano
by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:09 AM

no, to sum it up, once a cheater always a cheater.  i have stayed with my husband through some bad things that made me lose trust, now i realize he is never gonna care who he hurts.  if i keep on staying, he gets his cake and eats it too.  i am now leaving him but i stayed way too long.

Lanie_momofone
by on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:10 AM

 oh honey...i dont have any advice for you! but i hope that you can get through this, all i can say is listen to your gut.

Mamie_85
by Ruby Member on Jun. 13, 2010 at 10:10 AM

i am so sorry, i dont think i could stay around after that. good luck

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