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Husband's girlfriend handling our divorce (and other things)?!!

Posted by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:01 PM
  • 164 Replies

Hi Ladies-

  My husband and I are getting a divorce.  We separated the end of May and my children, 3 and 2, and I moved back to WA.  He's in TX right now on leave until he leaves for Korea next month.  He's in the Army and will be gone for a year. 

  My husband just got back together with his ex-girlfriend.  His mom got them back together.  They dated on and off for 2-3 years before he joined the Army.  We met in basic training and have been together for 4 years, married for now 2 years.  Anyway here's my problem right here: he's getting his girlfriend involved in our divorce.  He just called me and was telling me  this stuff about custody, financial support, and other things which were not what we had discussed and agreed on before.  According to him he got the information from his gf and she's going with him to talk to a lawyer on Monday.  Idk if she's been married before or has children or if she works for a lawyer.  I heard her telling him something in the background.

  He also stated that when he goes to Korea he's going to give his gf power of attorney to handle all of his affairs while he's gone.  He told me send all papers and documents to his mother and she'll send them to his gf.  Gf will fill them out and sign them and send them back.  I asked him does that mean she can handle and sign our divorce papers.  He said she can as long as she has power of attorney to do so.  I'm so confused.  Everything has been civil so far and then this.  I have not spoken to his gf although he says I can.   I have no problem with him having a gf but I don't understand why she would need to get involved in any of this.  He said that she just wants to help out and make sure everything goes ok for everyone.  Honestly Idk if he's telling the truth about any of this.

  What should I do?  Has anyone else been in a similiar situation like this?  Can his gf handle and sign our divorce papers?

                                                         Thanks in advance ladies!!

by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:01 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Daemons_mommy
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:04 PM

 I really don't know about any of this. But, when I was reading your post the only thing I could think was that the GF is going to try and screw you. I could very well be wrong but just make sure you have a lawyer and read every document. Even the fine print. Hope everything works out great for you! *hugs*

butterflymom6
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:04 PM

i would think it would be a conflicted of interest... but idk so i would call an attorney....

CAMKsMom
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:05 PM

power of attorney can be given rights such as this.

Charweba
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:07 PM

yep I would get a lawyer to look over everything!!!

Quoting Daemons_mommy:

 I really don't know about any of this. But, when I was reading your post the only thing I could think was that the GF is going to try and screw you. I could very well be wrong but just make sure you have a lawyer and read every document. Even the fine print. Hope everything works out great for you! *hugs*


Jennifer63080
by Platinum Member on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:08 PM

 f-ing men......

TheresaC7
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:08 PM

I am not sure, but DO make sure that you stick to your guns in what you want. The GF is only looking out for her well being. I know I would be if I was in her position. Just make sure you are getting everything you and your kids will need. Good luck!

gwebkeijmmm
by Platinum Member on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:09 PM
I don`t know but I would be pissed. Sorry you have to deal with what sounds like a power-hungry gf on top of everything else. Just make sure you have a good lawyer to protect yourself.
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Mom2RJnVA
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:11 PM
I definitely would not feel comfortable in that situation. I would just let him know that you would be more comfortable with him handling things until he leaves. After he deploys, that's a different story. I'm sorry that you are in that situation. Hope it gets better and goes smoothly!
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audra1010
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:11 PM

 you need to consult a lawyer and only trust what they say.  go apply for legal aid in your state if you can't afford one.  she has no business getting involved in yours.  do not trust anyone else in this but your lawyer.  your dh and his gf will tell you anything to believe them.  even if she is a lawyer or aid or just doing research on the net.  i would tell your dh that this marriage/divorce only involves you and him.  not his g.f.  and if she is in fact his power of attorny, you want to see paperwork proving it. 

looks to me that they are trying to get legal advise from the net.

GL!

Momluv269
by Bronze Member on Jun. 26, 2010 at 3:20 PM

Do not just take his word; make sure this is all legal. Consult your lawyer who will contact his lawyer.

As far as his girlfriend handling your divorce/custody ....I do think its inappropriate and a conflict of interests at best; unethical and demeaning at worst. Having someone represent you in such critical matters as this, especially decisions concerning your children, should be a trusted family member , or longterm family friend at least. How long has he been with this girl?  

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