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can i tell you a secret....im scared. *kind of long*

Posted by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:37 PM
  • 15 Replies

i dont feel like i can talk to my husband about this...so you im talking to you ladies. im scared. for those who dont know, my husband's deployment date got moved up two months. even though i knew it was coming, i feel so unprepared. *before anyone says anything-yes this is what we signed up for, but it doesnt make it any easier. anywho-on to the point of my post.

im scared. first of all, im all alone here. this isnt our first deployment (its our 2nd) but the last time, i went and stayed with family. im staying in my own house this time. i just moved to a new neighborhood, and i dont know ANYONE. i mean, its not like i am rolling in friends here anyway (i have...like 4) but i dont know anyone in this part of town. that kind of freaks me out a little. i have never been alone like this before.

im also afraid for my son. he is only 3 (turns 4 while daddy is gone) and he doesnt understand what is going on. last time my husband deployed, we stayed with family. he had lots of distraction between nonna, pawpaw, his aunt (age 11), cousins, etc. this time, he only has me (and preschool during the day). im afraid that im not going to be enough. i know he loves me. but he has a very strong bond with his dad (we have a strong bond but its different KWIM). probably because i have been the constant in his life where his dad has been gone some. what if im not enough when he misses his dad? it may seem silly but im really worried about that. if anyone has any tips, it would be appreciated.

ugh..im not looking forward to this. i am trying really really hard not to cry or at least trying to wait until im alone, but its so hard. im doing good so far today. i didnt cry too much. i did have to run to the bathroom a couple times. last night was horrible. keep in mind, we just found out yesterday that his deployment was moved up. i feel like there is still so much to do. we havent even been in this house a month yet.

anyway, if you wanna comment or ask questions, feel free. if i dont respond, its because im getting our son to sleep. thanks for reading.  (:

by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:37 PM
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Replies (1-10):
SThompson21
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:40 PM

BUMP!

Brianav
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:40 PM
Your strong. Heck, you HAVE to be strong to marry a military man. Good luck and may he come home safe.
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Daemons_mommy
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:42 PM

I'm sorry momma. I'm not a military wife so I have no advice for you and really no idea what you are going through. Just wanted to let you know that if you ever need and ear, please feel free to pm me. *Hugs* to you.  

SkroveMomma
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:43 PM

I'm a navy wifey and I have yet to do a deployment (while married) and I am scared too! My daughter will turn 3 about the time my DH leaves for deployment, (in 2 years, we are on shore duty currently) and I already am freaking out about being a single momma! Plus we are going to be ttc in a few months so I will have 2! I totally understand what it's like to have your man gone tho, as a navy g/f my husband was out to sea a lot but like you I always had distractions (college, roommates, etc). Just remember that you CAN do it, we ARE strong for our families, and if it ever gets to be too much your family is only a plane ride away! Hugs!

aprilmommy2007
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:44 PM

an idea for your son, do you have a video camera, maybe have your husband make him a little video for when he is gone so when your son wants to see daddy you can play the video. and maybe let your son pick a shirt that is your husbands to wear to bed when he is gone or to sleep with that will remind him of daddy. I never been thru it but im just thinking these might help a little

SpcCraftsWife
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:47 PM

 honey- i think all of those emotions are normal. especially the ones about your son. My DD is 2 and a complete daddy's girl. hes been gone for 6 months and she still asks every day about him. we recorded a video of him reading to her and singing to her and i let her watch a slideshow of pics of them together on my computer pretty often. im sure he'll still have meltdowns and theyll break your heart like its never been broken before- but you'll both make it through. good luck. stay busy is the best advice i can offer you!

creneep83
by Silver Member on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:49 PM

my sister is going through the same thing but this is her 4th time, her hubby, my BIL has been deployed for the 4th time! but all ladies who married into the military are strong women! i'm an Army brat so I have somewhat an idea. Just keep your head up, where are you station at?

3xangel
by Ruby Member on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:50 PM

 my dh is currently deployed, matter of fact this is his 2nd one (thank God he is coming home for good in a few more months). it is hard and scary at first but as the days go by you start to get into a routine. both times he deployed i stayed in our place, i think its silly to up and move just because he is gone kwim? dont worry you will get through this, show your ds a lot of pics of your dh and make sure you guys download skype on your laptops. focus on doing more things for yourself. go to school, work out at the gym on post, do something to keep yourself busy. im doing everything i suggested you do.

bensmum25
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:52 PM

 I'm not a army wife, but one of my friends is. When her husband left she had a picture of her husband, made into a stuffed toy/pillow, and had him record a few messages into one of those buttons that you can put in a stuffed toy. Whenever the kids missed dad they could hug it and it would say  "Always remember I love you" and cute things like that. It was good cuz the kids could hear his voice. HTH!!

arzelturner
by on Jun. 26, 2010 at 11:53 PM

BUMP!

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