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which would you go to?

Posted by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:39 PM
  • 10 Replies

 

Poll

Question: a family member's funeral who has been sick/dying for a long time, or be the maid of honor in your best friend's wedding?

Options:

wedding

funeral


Only group members can vote in this poll.

Total Votes: 17

View Results

by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:39 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Ali84Shorty
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:42 PM

funeral..family comes first

exceptalilfish
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:43 PM

what if you are closer to the friend than the family member? just wondering...

Quoting Ali84Shorty:

funeral..family comes first


pyrateprincess
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:46 PM

this is hard..but i would say wedding. why you ask? because funerals are depressing. You go to a church look at the damn casket that the person is in and just cry. whats the point? a man that i considered to be my father recently died. it was my best friends dad. they decided not to do a funeral but a month later did a "celebration of life" instead. If it was the celebration of life thing instead of a yuckie funereal then i would attend that. going to this celebration of life has changed my views on if i even want a funeral when i die. although my family would flip since they're all catholics...

Ali84Shorty
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:48 PM


Quoting exceptalilfish:

what if you are closer to the friend than the family member? just wondering...

Quoting Ali84Shorty:

funeral..family comes first

 

me personally even if i was closer to my friend then that family member I would still go in respect of my family and thats just how i am lol but like i said thats just me sorry i cant be anymore help

exceptalilfish
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:48 PM

i like that idea too, the celebration of life. it is sweet =)

Quoting pyrateprincess:

this is hard..but i would say wedding. why you ask? because funerals are depressing. You go to a church look at the damn casket that the person is in and just cry. whats the point? a man that i considered to be my father recently died. it was my best friends dad. they decided not to do a funeral but a month later did a "celebration of life" instead. If it was the celebration of life thing instead of a yuckie funereal then i would attend that. going to this celebration of life has changed my views on if i even want a funeral when i die. although my family would flip since they're all catholics...


exceptalilfish
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:49 PM

oh it's okay, your input is help enough, thanks for replying!

Quoting Ali84Shorty:


Quoting exceptalilfish:

what if you are closer to the friend than the family member? just wondering...

Quoting Ali84Shorty:

funeral..family comes first


me personally even if i was closer to my friend then that family member I would still go in respect of my family and thats just how i am lol but like i said thats just me sorry i cant be anymore help


areid1023
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:51 PM

i think its up to you. i cant pick because i don't know how i would feel not being in that situation. good luck. my view of funerals, unless its there to support another living person, is that it is for the living to say goodbye to that person if they feel the need. if you don't, you don't, it doesn't make you a bad person, it means you've said goodbye in your own way. once again tho, your relationship with the living members of the family is important in this situation, but don't feel guilty about not going FOR the dead family member,

exceptalilfish
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:54 PM

thanks. i asked my whole family and they all want me to go to the wedding. they say that is what he wanted. but my SIL is trying to convince people not to go to my wedding in sept. since i may not go to the funeral. i am the maid of honor/only bridesmaid she is having. she would have no one up there with her and she is like my sister, been friends 14 years. i just feel bad.

Quoting areid1023:

i think its up to you. i cant pick because i don't know how i would feel not being in that situation. good luck. my view of funerals, unless its there to support another living person, is that it is for the living to say goodbye to that person if they feel the need. if you don't, you don't, it doesn't make you a bad person, it means you've said goodbye in your own way. once again tho, your relationship with the living members of the family is important in this situation, but don't feel guilty about not going FOR the dead family member,


areid1023
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:54 PM

i didn't go to one of my old best friend's little sister's funeral but i did go to her little sister's bday party the year after she died. it was also a celebration of life and it was a continuation of her memory as we were still celebrating her bday and it was very wonderful. :).

Quoting pyrateprincess:

this is hard..but i would say wedding. why you ask? because funerals are depressing. You go to a church look at the damn casket that the person is in and just cry. whats the point? a man that i considered to be my father recently died. it was my best friends dad. they decided not to do a funeral but a month later did a "celebration of life" instead. If it was the celebration of life thing instead of a yuckie funereal then i would attend that. going to this celebration of life has changed my views on if i even want a funeral when i die. although my family would flip since they're all catholics...


 my little bug! 11-29-08

areid1023
by on Jun. 27, 2010 at 8:58 PM

well there is your answer. go to the wedding. :). your loved one (i assume you loved the deceased but lord knows family doesn't guanrantee good feelings or love) is being put to rest and you being there would be important if it was for YOU and you alone. don't let anyone guilt trip you, thats their issue, not yours. :). your SIL sounds like a total biatch...no offense.

Quoting exceptalilfish:

thanks. i asked my whole family and they all want me to go to the wedding. they say that is what he wanted. but my SIL is trying to convince people not to go to my wedding in sept. since i may not go to the funeral. i am the maid of honor/only bridesmaid she is having. she would have no one up there with her and she is like my sister, been friends 14 years. i just feel bad.

Quoting areid1023:

i think its up to you. i cant pick because i don't know how i would feel not being in that situation. good luck. my view of funerals, unless its there to support another living person, is that it is for the living to say goodbye to that person if they feel the need. if you don't, you don't, it doesn't make you a bad person, it means you've said goodbye in your own way. once again tho, your relationship with the living members of the family is important in this situation, but don't feel guilty about not going FOR the dead family member,

 


 my little bug! 11-29-08

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