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Hubby Issues

Posted by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 6:49 PM
  • 16 Replies

I don't know how to fix this. I love my husband dearly, but sometimes I just feel like he doesn't care about me the same way. For example, not acknowledging me on Mother's Day or my birthday. Little comments that are "just jokes" and such. My feelings are truly hurt. Everytime I tell him this, he just plays it off like oh well I do love you and you know that, blah blah. Well, NO I dont know that. I don't feel like you do. And it always comes down to him saying, well I do. Or, "what do you want me to do?" It's like a lose situation. I tell him how I feel and nothing gets resolved, but I don't tell him and I'm just an unhappy person. I love him to death, but I don't know if I'm just being the crazy one and believing what he says is enough or if saying it and not showing it is just as bad?? I don't know. I just don't know what to do. I want to talk to him but I know exactly what he's going to say and I'm going to walk away feeling the exact same way I did before we talked. :-/

natural_parenting.png picture by kwright9608


    Mommy of 2 Wonderful Boys!

by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 6:49 PM
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Replies (1-10):
Crazy-Steph
by Ruby Member on Jul. 12, 2010 at 6:51 PM
Look at how he treats you. What does be do that is good in your eyes? Your way of "loving" might be different Than his.
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MsDean
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 6:52 PM

 If words are not working then try to get throught o him with action. Do you cook for him? If so stop doing it. His laundry, his dishes, BJ's, anything you do for him needs to stop and when he notices tel him that unless he works this out with you he is on his own.

sarasloveable
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 6:54 PM
Agree


Quoting MsDean:

 If words are not working then try to get throught o him with action. Do you cook for him? If so stop doing it. His laundry, his dishes, BJ's, anything you do for him needs to stop and when he notices tel him that unless he works this out with you he is on his own.


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briansmommy7143
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 7:05 PM

Doesn't work. Just causes us to argue. It's not about me doing things for him either. I just feel like he's not attracted to me and could pretty much take it or leave it. He says it's not true, but for some reason, I just don't believe him. I don't know how to get across to him that him just telling me isn't good enough. Am I crazy??

Quoting MsDean:

 If words are not working then try to get throught o him with action. Do you cook for him? If so stop doing it. His laundry, his dishes, BJ's, anything you do for him needs to stop and when he notices tel him that unless he works this out with you he is on his own.


natural_parenting.png picture by kwright9608


    Mommy of 2 Wonderful Boys!

dusky_rose
by Sue on Jul. 12, 2010 at 7:07 PM

BUMP!

paralegalmommy
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 7:09 PM

 Have you ever read 5 love languages?  It could be that you and your husband speak different "languages".  It is a great book.

activitymode
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 7:09 PM

BUMP!

mereinhart28
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 7:10 PM

No I don't think you are sounding crazy. Those things can be hurtful. I don't really have any suggestions other than telling him how it hurts you. Which you have already done. Sometimes men can be pretty hard headed. Sorry Momma!

ShaunaYve
by on Jul. 12, 2010 at 7:11 PM
I know exactly how you feel... My husband is a great guy and husband but ubfortunately after years of being together he's no longer sympathetic or able to give me the emotional support he use to. I think that sometimes talking just makes things worse with guys who don't care to talk. Try treating him the way he treats you... I'm not saying stop being a good wife but show him how you feel.

Quoting briansmommy7143:

I don't know how to fix this. I love my husband dearly, but sometimes I just feel like he doesn't care about me the same way. For example, not acknowledging me on Mother's Day or my birthday. Little comments that are "just jokes" and such. My feelings are truly hurt. Everytime I tell him this, he just plays it off like oh well I do love you and you know that, blah blah. Well, NO I dont know that. I don't feel like you do. And it always comes down to him saying, well I do. Or, "what do you want me to do?" It's like a lose situation. I tell him how I feel and nothing gets resolved, but I don't tell him and I'm just an unhappy person. I love him to death, but I don't know if I'm just being the crazy one and believing what he says is enough or if saying it and not showing it is just as bad?? I don't know. I just don't know what to do. I want to talk to him but I know exactly what he's going to say and I'm going to walk away feeling the exact same way I did before we talked. :-/

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MommySwiggles
by Platinum Member on Jul. 12, 2010 at 7:13 PM

I don't know what to tell you but good luck!  My brother is the same way (I don't know how he is to his GF but to me anthing that bothers me and I try to bring it up, he was "just joking" and I need to "quit being so sensitive") And this is just my brother, not my hubby.  It hurts coming from him as it is, I couldn't imagine that coming from DH.  Good luck hun!

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