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life after babies

Posted by on Dec. 9, 2010 at 4:59 PM
  • 6 Replies

ok, me and my boyfriend have been together for 7 years and we have 3 children together 5 and under. the first year we were together we had kids. and he is just starting to be serious about marrying me. we met i was 18 he was 32. and now af ter the kids i feel like whats next i cant keep having kids to feel happy. so its like whats next for us. when i ask him what his plans are he says stuff about the kids. Im wondering was it ever about me . he says he loves me but when i think about life together w/him and not involving the kids (whats next)? is it that i need to leave to have someone be more about me more in to me ? what do u think ?

by on Dec. 9, 2010 at 4:59 PM
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Replies (1-6):
mna_823
by on Dec. 9, 2010 at 5:00 PM

 i think that you should tell him this and see what he says.

jillbailey26
by on Dec. 9, 2010 at 5:16 PM

Do you mean like a date night here and there or life after the kids are grown?


"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19


mommy2000
by on Dec. 9, 2010 at 5:21 PM


Quoting jillbailey26:

Do you mean like a date night here and there or life after the kids are grown?

I mean like what else is their to focus on besides having kids

jillbailey26
by on Dec. 9, 2010 at 5:29 PM


Quoting mommy2000:


Quoting jillbailey26:

Do you mean like a date night here and there or life after the kids are grown?

I mean like what else is their to focus on besides having kids

Well, my husband and I don't have a babysitter.  So we make sure our kids have a strict bedtime, lol.  After they go to bed that's when our "me" time starts.  We'll sit and watch TV together, we'll watch a movie or we'll do something separate.  I'll play on the computer and he'll play video games.  Whatever we choose.  We don't get out much without the kids when we're both together, but it's something we've gotten used to.  He will stay home with them while I go grocery shopping (or any other shopping) so I can go alone.  That's really nice, lol.


"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19


mommy2000
by on Dec. 9, 2010 at 6:08 PM


Quoting jillbailey26:


Quoting mommy2000:

 

Quoting jillbailey26:

Do you mean like a date night here and there or life after the kids are grown?

I mean like what else is their to focus on besides having kids

Well, my husband and I don't have a babysitter.  So we make sure our kids have a strict bedtime, lol.  After they go to bed that's when our "me" time starts.  We'll sit and watch TV together, we'll watch a movie or we'll do something separate.  I'll play on the computer and he'll play video games.  Whatever we choose.  We don't get out much without the kids when we're both together, but it's something we've gotten used to.  He will stay home with them while I go grocery shopping (or any other shopping) so I can go alone.  That's really nice, lol.

what about if when he comes home from work he dosent want to deal with me or the kids and he wants to always be byhimself.

jillbailey26
by on Dec. 9, 2010 at 6:37 PM


Quoting mommy2000:


Quoting jillbailey26:


Quoting mommy2000:


Quoting jillbailey26:

Do you mean like a date night here and there or life after the kids are grown?

I mean like what else is their to focus on besides having kids

Well, my husband and I don't have a babysitter.  So we make sure our kids have a strict bedtime, lol.  After they go to bed that's when our "me" time starts.  We'll sit and watch TV together, we'll watch a movie or we'll do something separate.  I'll play on the computer and he'll play video games.  Whatever we choose.  We don't get out much without the kids when we're both together, but it's something we've gotten used to.  He will stay home with them while I go grocery shopping (or any other shopping) so I can go alone.  That's really nice, lol.

what about if when he comes home from work he dosent want to deal with me or the kids and he wants to always be byhimself.

For us, I always just let him walk in the house, he'll say hi to everyone and just veg for a little bit.  Whether it be in our room or on the couch.  Once he has that 5-10-15-20 minutes to just decompress from the day, he comes and gets involved.  It's pretty stressful to come home and immediately be handed the reigns of the whole house.  On the other side, it's stressful to be home with kids all day and then he comes home and wants more time to himself.  You two just have to find a middle ground.  You have to be able to see it from the others' perspective.


"Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification"  Romans 14:19


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