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Would you be upset if dh didnt consult you on a $700 purchase?

Posted by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:00 AM
  • 133 Replies

My dh got paid yesterday by a client in cash.  He was suppose to bring the cash to the bank. I offered but since he was going out with the "guys' to celebrate his B-day and he was going to be next to the bank he decied he would go.  Before he left he specifically said we can't just waste $$ we have to go easy and bank most of it.  So he goes out and comes home and he never made it to the bank.  He stopped off at the computer store and bought a new hard drive and a software he needed $200.  I knew he needed to buy that but he said he was going to wait until i got paid today. the client that owes me money has a habbit of waiting a bit to pay me so he said we should wait till we have my pay.  Then while he was out  his uncle mentions he has a camera he wants to sell he paid $1400 for about 2 years ago.  He was thinking of selling it on Ebay for $800-$900. Dh decides he wants the camera and asks his uncle how much he would sell it to him for.  uncle decides $500.  So with cash burning a whole in his pocet he decides he'll buy it.  He gave uncle $200 and owes him $300.  I can't stand to owe anyone anything so we have to give it to him right away.  Oweing is bad.  lol

The Kicker --- I was a bit upset  No screaming, NO yelling --  I said Hun don't you think you should of talked to me first so we could of decided on $700 purchases together.  His response-- "I dont have to call and ask for permission on whether or not i can spend my money"  "its my money i'll do what i want"     this is a man who calls me before he buys his lunch to make sure it fits in the budget. But because he was with "the guys" who none of which are married or even in a half decent relationship"  calling me was a bad idea.   And of course now he's upset and wishes he hadnt spent the $$. 

***EDITED TO SAY*****  this was not a huge blown out fight or even a real argument. He realzied pretty quickly what he said was wrong and he did apologise,as well as apologised for the purchase without a phone call.    Other than the debate factor its all but over with.

by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:00 AM
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Replies (1-10):
paigesmommy5264
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:02 AM

 since you didnt have the money to spend, yes I would be upset! He can return the hard drive...

orcadarwin
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:03 AM

If my husband spent that much on something without talking with me first, I don't think I would be upset, as long as all the bills were paid and we had groceries.  If it was just spending money, then I would be okay with it.  

Now, if we still had bills to pay and needed food, then yeah, I would be a bit upset.

massteria
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:04 AM

We normally discuss large purchases before making them, no matter who is doing the actual purchasing.  However, there have been times when he has bought something without talking to me first.  Being that he is the head of this household, I will express my displeasure about it and leave it alone.  If we come up short, he sees that he screwed up and it is on him to figure out where to get the money to cover the shortage. 

mommymelissa76
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:04 AM

I would be LIVID. He would be sleeping in the doghouse with his precious hard drive and camera to keep him warm...

ddhb2007
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:06 AM

No, but $700 is a pittance in our budget.  If we were broke, it would probably bother me.

Gr8AZMom
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:06 AM

My DH and I often make purchases without discussing with each other except for large items, then we discuss it.

However, if your DH couldn't do as he normally does because he was with his friends; well, now he can enjoy his camera and hard drive while he is upset for spending the money.

Sorry, but Men will be Men,

southern_momof2
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:08 AM
Yes I would be upset. I handle all the money in our home, but we always talk about big purchases. I even talk to him about which bill to pay and when to pay it.
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childofthesun
by on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:08 AM

I'd say, ''Oh thank you for the camera honey! I love it!"

Crazy-Steph
by Ruby Member on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:09 AM

 I would have handled it like you did.  It bothers me more that he pulled the whole "my money" thing.

Barronbaby
by Gold Member on Mar. 2, 2011 at 9:09 AM
I'd be upset... It's not dh's money it's our money meaning big purchaces have to be talked about.... I even had my dh put his 2 cents into which breast pump to buy.
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