Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)

My little sister is getting terrorized in school

Posted by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:30 AM
  • 11 Replies

My sister who is 15 is having a hard time in school. Ill go ahead and post the story from the beginning.

 

 Back in December, my sister was hanging out with a friend alone at his house. He ended up raping her, and holding a pillow over her face. She told a friend the next Monday at school. She went with my sister to the counselor. Of course my mom was called, and it was a huge deal. The detectives stated they believed my sister, but because it had been on a Friday, and no one knew til Monday there probably would not be a lot of proof left.  They set strict rules on who she could talk to about this, and let the guy (we will call him C) know he can not be within 100 ft of her, but itd only last 30 days.. He goes to the same school she does, so she had to face him everyday in between classes, ect.

Ever since then there have been incidents atleast once a week where she calls my mom crying and ends up going home. A few incidents have included one of Cs friends gfs writing (sisters name here) is a whore, on the white board in class. My sister seen it, ran out and startedcrying, and she went home. Some girls have gained up on her and spit in her face in the bathroom. C has recently went and sat down by my sister at lunch taunting her.

My mom says shes irate, however she is not doing anything about it. She says she will go to the school and get it figured out but she hasnt yet. She just lets it keep happening. To me, thats insane. It should not have ever happened, and sure in the hell not more than one time.

If it were me. (and trust me if I didnt live 6 hours away I would be there) I would march my ass into the school. Demand the principal, counselor and maybe even the detectives and make it stop then. If it didnt, if it happened again, I would be claling media ect and asking them to help me however they could.

I just feel so sorry for my baby sister. I dont know what to do. I dont know how to help. I dont wanna make things worse for her. I just feel so bad.  I know since the school hasnt been told about the torment and taunting they are doing to her they cant do anything. I just dont know what to do. Any suggestions? thoughts? how would you handle it as your daughters mom?

by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:30 AM
Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Replies (1-10):
Veni.Vidi.Vici
by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:33 AM

As her sister you can call the school and speak to the administrators and the couselors and express your concern. If they happen to say they can't speak to you because of privacy issues, hey that's great because you will be the one doing all of the talking.


Veni.Vidi.Vici
by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:35 AM

My niece was struggling in school and went from honor roll to d's. I called the school and reached out to the couselors and a teacher she mentioned was her favorite. Since my call she now has 2 mentors and teachers that adore her looking out for her best interest.

Mommyof2n0308
by Platinum Member on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:35 AM


Quoting Veni.Vidi.Vici:

As her sister you can call the school and speak to the administrators and the couselors and express your concern. If they happen to say they can't speak to you because of privacy issues, hey that's great because you will be the one doing all of the talking.


But I am 6 hours away. I cant go in and talk to them, or else my ass would have marched up there in December and itd be taken care of. I have thought about emailing them, but I am not sure that would be nearly as affective, and I am afraid I would not be taken seriously. :(

Veni.Vidi.Vici
by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:36 AM


Quoting Mommyof2n0308:


Quoting Veni.Vidi.Vici:

As her sister you can call the school and speak to the administrators and the couselors and express your concern. If they happen to say they can't speak to you because of privacy issues, hey that's great because you will be the one doing all of the talking.


But I am 6 hours away. I cant go in and talk to them, or else my ass would have marched up there in December and itd be taken care of. I have thought about emailing them, but I am not sure that would be nearly as affective, and I am afraid I would not be taken seriously. :(

You won't know until you try. I mentioned you should call.

snowpeasmom
by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:38 AM
Your sister needs to get in therapy. Look up rain.org I believe they have a free 800 number that your sister can call anytime day or night. They can even give free sessions. And she needs to go to a different school or homeschool.

If that isn't possible at lease call the school and give them a heads up
Posted on CafeMom Mobile
kgsharber
by Gold Member on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:38 AM

 You should make the Pincipal & Councelor's life hell. Tell them you will call the media if they don't get it handled. There is no reason they need to know you are 6 hours away ;0)

kgsharber
by Gold Member on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:39 AM

 Also, have you talked to HIS parents?? DO they have any idea what he is doing? If it were my son, his whole world would change (I have 3 ds)

Mommyof2n0308
by Platinum Member on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:41 AM


Quoting Veni.Vidi.Vici:


Quoting Mommyof2n0308:

 

Quoting Veni.Vidi.Vici:

As her sister you can call the school and speak to the administrators and the couselors and express your concern. If they happen to say they can't speak to you because of privacy issues, hey that's great because you will be the one doing all of the talking.


But I am 6 hours away. I cant go in and talk to them, or else my ass would have marched up there in December and itd be taken care of. I have thought about emailing them, but I am not sure that would be nearly as affective, and I am afraid I would not be taken seriously. :(

You won't know until you try. I mentioned you should call.

Thanks. My mom supposedly is going up there tomorrow, but shes been saying that for months. If she does not, I just found my old counselors email address and she is still at the school. I think I will call or email her and let her know what is going on. She really helped me when I went there and was pregnant with my DD. So I think I will reach out to her, if my mom doesnt stick to her guns this time.


 

Mommyof2n0308
by Platinum Member on Mar. 28, 2011 at 12:47 AM


Quoting kgsharber:

 Also, have you talked to HIS parents?? DO they have any idea what he is doing? If it were my son, his whole world would change (I have 3 ds)


My mom has been looking at different schools. I dont know why she isnt in a different school yet. I would have pulled her out long ago. I guess she just doesnt want to feel "defeated" or "chased" out of the school she is very involved in. She is on the ladies soccer team, and even the coach as been a bitch to her lately. She is in counseling/support group for other girls who have been through similar situations. Which is why the soccer coach is being a bitch. She cant miss any practiced or she cant play in the next game. Well she has to miss Wed. practices for her support group/therapy. Her coach has not been told the situation, which is probably why shes not excusing it. My mom refuses to tell her. I hope I never go through what my mom is going through or my DD going through what my sister is, but I can not imagine handling it the way my mom is, if i ever did.

Talking to his parents is apparently not an option. The detectives said no contact what so ever between any of his family or mine. But you have to look at it at their point of view. Im not sure Id be defending my son who was being accused of rape to when there was no proof. Its not something Id be able to accept unless tehre was solid proof. However I would make life a bit more hard on him, Id keep better track of him. He would not ever be alone in my house with a girl, or alone in my house period. ect ect.

hanniwrencher
by on Mar. 28, 2011 at 1:42 AM

i can relate... (except i was 'gang raped')  by 5 athletes in the hs i went to... p.m. me if you want to talk, or need some ideas. i've been through what your sister is going through. sorry she's going through this... but, suggest to your mom to take her to a counselor, and or a therapy group, so she can deal with this...

Add your quick reply below:
You must be a member to reply to this post.
Join the Meeting Place for Moms!
Talk to other moms, share advice, and have fun!

(minimum 6 characters)